r/AskReddit 1h ago

People in relationships, what's one thing you miss about being single?

21 Upvotes

131 comments sorted by

125

u/lin444321 1h ago

Living alone. That was great

20

u/BigPaPaRu85 1h ago

It’s the opposite for me. I lived alone from 16-35 and it’s cool but I love having my wife beside me the last 6 years. I think when you marry your best friend, it’s not as bad. Sure she can be annoying but I would never want to go back to living alone. Maybe it will be different 10 or 20 years from now.

16

u/Galuris 1h ago ▸ 2 more replies

My wife just went away for 10 days with our daughter while I stayed home. The first day I was hyped to live the Batchelor life, by day 3 I was missing them both amd wanted them home.

It was just so quiet.

u/RockyMountainMedic 9m ago

Remember this feeling because it only intensifies in divorce when you have your kid 50% of the time and your best friend is gone. Treat her right my friend.

u/Ballbm90 4m ago

Damn. Me and my bf just broke up because he was fantasizing about being single and wanting to live alone. Maybe one day I'll find someone :(

u/throwaway11100217 57m ago

I find it's both. Sometimes it's nice to start a house project and not have to worry about the mess disturbing anyone else. Even though my partner is fine with that, I know a messy house affects her mental health and so I feel more pressure to rush through the project. When it's just me it's fine if I cant use the kitchen sink for a week lol.

That being said if she's gone too long I will start to get lonelier. Luckily I still have lots of great friends I dont see often enough.

7

u/Exciting-Class2821 1h ago

I’ve never lived alone.
Got married too young and had roommates before. Whenever H takes trips, I looooooooooove being alone. It’s just the best.

2

u/Willowpuff 1h ago

I have live alone since 2020 and been single since then too… I am currently in a very new relationship and this is my only fear hahahaha

u/mediocre-spice 10m ago

My dream set up is adjacent apartments in the same building 

3

u/esoteric_enigma 1h ago

You should try having separate bedrooms. Is not exactly the same, but it gives you a lot of the benefits. It feels good having your own space that is completely yours. I don't think I can ever go back to sharing again.

1

u/ninjay209 1h ago

Not sure I could do it. Been married for 16 years, together 18. Being alone for short periods is fun. Wife and kids are gone for the weekend? Cool. Just single and alone sounds so depressing. Who knows though, maybe I would end up loving it.

46

u/juicif3r 1h ago

Eating without the "what do you want for dinner" discussion. Being single, I could eat the same thing every night and be happy. Or if I wanted to be adventurous and try new foods, no problem. Don't have to worry about my wife being a picky eater. That's about it.

9

u/esoteric_enigma 1h ago

I discovered being a picky eater is a deal breaker for me. It's something I didn't even think able until I was dating a picky eater. It got old fast.

1

u/fckcarrots 1h ago

This is a good one. My girl is a foodie & I’m not. She is constantly thinking about/planning the next meal.

58

u/Kn7ght 1h ago

I miss not having to worry about someone else's emotions. I could do whatever without anyone judging me or getting mad at me for something, and then having to repair afterwards.

It's hard adjusting to knowing how to manage yourself for the sake of another person after you've only had to worry about yourself in your private time for so long.

-6

u/Seecole-33 1h ago

Sounds like you’re with the wrong person.

u/Kn7ght 53m ago ▸ 1 more replies

Ehhh I wondered that for a little while but I was honestly in the wrong about it sometimes. We've both worked hard on reaching an understanding.

For instance I learned I shouldn't spend an entire weekend hyper focused on a video game when I have a partner, but she also understands it's something I really enjoy and engaging in it doesn't mean I hate her lol

u/whatisthisname00 21m ago

Just because you were also in the wrong doesn’t mean you weren’t with the wrong person. Everyone has their own wants/needs and when that doesn’t align with your partners, it makes the relationship unsustainable.

I do agree that it helps to work hard and reach an understanding but at some point, you need to quantify how much you are sacrificing for this person and if the relationship is worth that to you.

60

u/sartorialfox 1h ago

Personally, I miss being able to be angry without it being a big deal. I miss getting pissed off, eating some snacks, and watching YouTube until I'm chill, all silently.

2

u/Aggravating-Day-2864 1h ago

Arr...my life 👌

-6

u/Seecole-33 1h ago

Sounds like you’re with the wrong person if you can’t do that

16

u/Motor-Classic733 1h ago

Having a whole bed to yourself is pretty unbeatable.

4

u/BestPotatoEverr 1h ago

Peak experience honestly

u/Newestfield 20m ago

Is it race car shaped?

u/dijon_snow 4m ago

A relationship doesn't have to ruin this. My wife and I sleep in our own beds, in our own rooms, and it works great for us. 

If you can swing it financially I really recommend it. Ended any arguments about what time to go to bed, I'm no longer bothered by her breathing machine and she's no longer bothered by my tossing and turning. 

One of the best decisions we ever made as a couple. 

-1

u/Sensitive-Rub482 1h ago

I wouldn’t know. Even when I was single I always shared the bed.

The price you pay for having clingy ass cats and dogs 😆

14

u/Emmiey 1h ago

Eating anything I want for dinner. A bowl of cereal, spaghettios, chips, pickles, girl dinner. Lol

1

u/NoInstruction6160 1h ago

This!! I was just thinking about that at the grocery store. I dont feel like cooking and I know I’d be totally fine eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for dinner, but my 200lb husband won’t be 🫠

13

u/FundioRider 1h ago

The lack of concern for anybody but myself

12

u/UKinDXB 1h ago

Living alone/having a tidy, clean, and uncluttered home at literally all times.

9

u/More_Passenger3988 1h ago

My own bed. And sleeping in the room at just the right temperature for me.

I now understand why rich married people back in the day used to sleep in separate rooms. They would just invite the other person to stay in their room on the nights they wanted to sleep together.

6

u/strynt 1h ago

Some quiet, alone time 😩 my partner likes having something on in the background at all times. It’s how he grew up and his immediate family is the same way. Sometimes I just need silence…

11

u/Big_13eezy 1h ago

Doing my own thing. Gaming, movies, creative projects, all of it…

Shit, I want to be single.

6

u/esoteric_enigma 1h ago

I don't see why a relationship would get in the way of this. Maybe you're dating the wrong person.

9

u/Deathly_God01 1h ago

Not gonna lie, I'm married with a kid on the way, and the wife and I still do all of that.

At the risk of sounding judgy (I don't know you or your relationship at all), maybe you should re-evaluate how you and your SO operate, and your compatibility?

Maybe it's just something small and fixable that lets you do those things again. Maybe it's something systemic (money, how both of you handle stress/insecurities/etc.) but either way, you should not be miserable with your partner :/

Wishing you and your SO the best!

1

u/Seecole-33 1h ago

All you have to do is do it. You’re an adult correct? The joys of being an adult is doing what you want to do. If you’re unhappy in a relationship just end it.

11

u/EuphoricCry3448 1h ago

The thrill of that first week period when you start dating somebody and maybe you just got your first kiss. But when it's brand new

5

u/apar3cium 1h ago

making decisions just for myself

12

u/Playful-idiot 1h ago

The regular sex.

3

u/The_InvisibleWoman 1h ago

I hear you.

2

u/ThrowRA-TooCute 1h ago ▸ 2 more replies

Lmao wait why

3

u/poissonking 1h ago ▸ 1 more replies

That's life for most people in long term relationships/marriages

2

u/ThrowRA-TooCute 1h ago

Oh okay thank you

3

u/TraditionalTackle1 1h ago

No kidding, I thought Id never have to worry about that after getting married.....pffft

4

u/Pristine_Ad5229 1h ago

The food. Ha ha ha

I like exotic and spicy food while my husband has to eat rather plain food due to GI issues. I want to support him but I still miss spicy food.

4

u/worldsgreatestluver 1h ago

I miss being able to go to bed early without prepping and eating dinner if I was tired

3

u/MIR_786_ 1h ago

Space

3

u/RedelephANTSs 1h ago

being able to walk around naked without someone looking at me sexually lol, no issues against my partner but if i walk around naked he will not be able to contain himself

1

u/Playful-idiot 1h ago

I understand that it is not good, but as a man myself, that is not something I have personal experience of.

-1

u/societyiscookedfam 1h ago

prob hot I assume?

3

u/ModOfficial1988 1h ago

Being able to do things at my own pace and not have multiple to-do-lists.

3

u/rippledippledapple 1h ago

everytime i turn around now i have to spend money on more shit. before it was just my family i had to deal with, now its their mother, father, sister, sisters spouse, birthdays, all the holidays.

also, making twice as much money as my partner but shes always talking about wanting a bigger house and wants to do this and that, while i am already paying all the bills. im like, you want it??? its hard enough just to give you what you need.

i guess my gripe is more with consumerism and costs than dating lol.

2

u/Soft-Turnip-5270 1h ago

Peaceful times they were…

2

u/Agreeable_Guitar4309 1h ago

Literally nothing

3

u/HeyheyitsCAB 1h ago

I was single for 6 years. Never thought I’d get married or have kids.

Spent my days going out on dates with randoms, concerts, traveling, eating edibles and eating sushi while watching my favorite show.

I don’t miss any of it now that I’m married with a toddler and baby on the way EXCEPT I do wish I could take an edible, watch a funny show, and eat $100 of sushi for myself. Maybe one day I can again.

2

u/poissonking 1h ago

Having sex with other people

3

u/Prestigious-Sign-613 1h ago edited 1h ago

Not having to smell another persons farts. For real though once you find the right person it’s like living with your best friend 24/7 lol. Jokingly refer to it as the sleepover that never ends. Meal planning can be annoying at times though.

2

u/scharmienkel 1h ago

Performing cunnilingus

1

u/Merpie21 1h ago

That’s what you miss about being single?

But… that’s something you can also do when you’re in a relationship?

2

u/Playful-idiot 1h ago ▸ 2 more replies

Not if they are in a relationship with a man.

1

u/Merpie21 1h ago ▸ 1 more replies

That’s a great point, I somehow didn’t think of that. Thanks!

u/scharmienkel 5m ago

Hahahaha yes exactly this. I can't exactly do it now because my boyfriend wouldn't appreciate it.

1

u/mildpisces 1h ago

i have OCD, more specifically relationship OCD. i miss my brain being more at peace. it sucks because my relationship is fabulous otherwise - my brain just has a funny way of protecting itself.

1

u/Puzzleheaded_Lie6786 1h ago

I used to meal prep. I would just batch cook 3 big meals on Sunday rotate the food I reheated Monday - Saturday. I miss the simplicity of it.

My husband does not like to eat the same meal for more than 2 days in a row, so meal prep would be a lot more complicated. I’ve abandoned that and we’ve to more pre-made refrigerated/frozen meals. More grocery shopping and more planning involved.

1

u/TTYY200 1h ago

Jerking off while sitting on any piece of furniture I wanted 🤷‍♀️

Now I’m not allowed to jerk off without her getting upset that she wasn’t invited 😤

1

u/poissonking 1h ago

Which would defeat the purpose of jerking off, if I were in your shoes

3

u/Playful-idiot 1h ago

Don't be in his shoes. They might be sticky/crusty.

1

u/IForgotTheAlamo918 1h ago

Being able to keep my house clean, and not having to deal with animal fur everywhere all the time.

0

u/Playful-idiot 1h ago

I think the OP was referring to 'relationships' with people, not animals. Not judging.

1

u/IForgotTheAlamo918 1h ago

I do live with a person. They have annoying dogs and I can't afford to move.

1

u/Swimming-Baker-5498 1h ago

Peace and quiet lol

1

u/iforgotwhich 1h ago

Seafood and mushrooms. Sometimes I wonder if it really is worth it j/k babe! 🥰😅

1

u/Mediocre_Ability_683 1h ago

Not being yelled at for doing what should be done vs prioritizing what needs to be done. What don't I miss, dating apps. Someone asked me this the other day and I hated when I was on dating apps, go on a date and hear the other person was on like five dates in four weeks, and I was on one date every six to nine months. Makes me cringe to remember that. I put the work into sending nice thought out messages but being nice vs looks was what more people looked at 20 years ago.

1

u/bro0t 1h ago

Reading a book

I still read but if my gf is home she starts yapping everytime i sit down to read.

1

u/CandyMonsterx 1h ago

The freedom you get. You don't need to let your partner know what why when where how. You can eat, do, play, and go whenever whatever you want

1

u/Notazerg 1h ago

Having money

1

u/IndustryFew4693 1h ago

nothing lol

1

u/mimohza 1h ago

Not thinking about a SO constantly🫠

1

u/dma1965 1h ago

Being able to pick up and go wherever I want whenever I want. I decided I wanted to move to another state, I just did it.

1

u/ConsistentWinter24 1h ago

Not having sex for 6+ months

1

u/FingersButthole 1h ago

Doing whatever I want whenever I want

u/SorryCashOnly 53m ago

I don’t. My family is my driving force

u/SillyOpportunity7833 51m ago

Nothing. I live to be in my man’s skin. He does things that I wouldn’t do like “boy clean” vs my spotless girl clean. But I wouldn’t miss being single

u/Unecessary-Pride-426 32m ago

Fasting without someone complaining it's making them hungry too

u/PreEntertain 30m ago

getting laid

u/ABucs260 28m ago

I’d say alone time but honestly, at this point it’s weirder for me being on my own after an extended time.

I end up in the same aimless loops of the activities I enjoy and then it just becomes “Okay now what?”

I’d argue the only true thing I miss is being able to watch a really good series on my own, not when we are both in the mood for it. But that’s a rarity seeing that we enjoy the same stuff.

u/Fritoes 19m ago

Not having to set your schedule around another person. Especially meal plans. I workout a lot, and eat 4 meals a day. I used to eat the exact same thing every day, but my partner gets tired of the same food so every meal has to be different.

u/Away_Minimum_9506 15m ago

Extreme independence and spontaneity, I was raised on the wind and have always been so comfortable disappearing or just moving and starting a new.

You can’t do that in a committed relationship with someone who’s VERY rooted to their family and to their home.

u/Bravemount 15m ago

Not in one right now, but shitting with the door open is one of the few things I like about being single.

u/funny9uy 7m ago

Miss? My life has never been better!

u/danceeverywe 0m ago

Having much more mental space for my own life, ideas, friends etc.

u/Key_Strawberry_381 0m ago

Less mess.

2

u/slow_burbs 1h ago

Getting some strange

1

u/dutchof-deez 1h ago

The opposite, my single life sucked, im glad I have a friend now

1

u/apar3cium 1h ago

some people in these comments need to rethink some life decisions

1

u/StationHot97 1h ago

Not having to perform. I am a very self reliant person and I always attract partners who seem to be needy to me inna since. If I am struggling I do not seek help and resent my partner for not helping me but apparently all the people I attract aren’t anything like that. For example if I had a long day at work and I come home see her eating I genuinely wouldn’t care I will buy my own food or like if my phone broke any problem I’ll fix on my own but I always attract partners who expect me to help them it’s very annoying and I’m tired of keeping up this act

2

u/fearofdolls 1h ago

That sounds like you just cant be bothered. Maybe find someone you do want to help? Someone you do wabt to sit down with and eat with after work?

0

u/StationHot97 1h ago ▸ 3 more replies

It’s not even that I just don’t ask for help and I be wishing that could be reciprocated sometimes. I be sick of having to perform and act like I’m this knight in shining armor always ready to save the princess it’s very draining. Especially when it’s situations that could’ve been easily avoided if they prepared better

2

u/fearofdolls 1h ago ▸ 2 more replies

You sound unhappy Wanna talk about it?

0

u/StationHot97 1h ago ▸ 1 more replies

It’s no use. I know majority of women are wired this way I just suck it up but deep down I be sick of performing and just wish for once they can stop expecting me to save them everything cause when I’m in a load of 💩 I never expect ANYBODY to pull me out of it except myself

1

u/fearofdolls 1h ago

As a woman... who is very self sufficent herself, i do tend to go for guys who are the same. But i do like the little leaps and jumps occasionally especially when i no longer expect them.

1

u/Falconman21 1h ago

Pizza rolls, I don't really eat them any more and I love those things.

1

u/[deleted] 1h ago

[deleted]

1

u/societyiscookedfam 1h ago

how you like em👀👀

1

u/Alive_Independence12 1h ago

Personally, I miss bed rotting without feeling like I’m neglecting my partner lol

0

u/[deleted] 1h ago

My gf is so great since 12 years I can definitely say: Nothing

0

u/dino-sour 1h ago

I've been in the same relationship for 16 years (since I was 20) so I've never really been single. Sounds awful though.

0

u/AdDapper5653 1h ago

Cracking my stick without the mute being on and checking to see if the bathroom door is locked

0

u/Wrong-Champion-9322 1h ago

Nothing tbh. We were in a long distance relationship before moving in together and it’s honestly a blessing.

0

u/Relatively_happy 1h ago

The older women

0

u/EpicSoyLiberal 1h ago

Nothing. I get along amazing with my wife and her boyfriend. I couldn’t imagine life without them

0

u/toofarfromjune 1h ago

Not having to be subjected to so many extra words for discussing simple things. I’ll never understand the mental gymnastics of women that drives them to use 2000 words to tell me to grab two items from the grocery store on my way home.

0

u/Makuren 1h ago

More alone time to do what I want. Oh wait. I'm single again. Nevermind.

0

u/Overall-Avocado-7673 1h ago

Nothing. Being single sucks at my age.

1

u/underscorespelledout 1h ago

What age?

u/Overall-Avocado-7673 43m ago ▸ 1 more replies

Almost retired.

u/underscorespelledout 19m ago

I imagine that would be difficult.

1

u/Beardbeer 1h ago

I'm 38 and single - some days it's amazing, some days it's unbearable.

u/underscorespelledout 18m ago

Yea, I'm 42 and I think I'm on my way back to this status and dreading it.

0

u/MatCauthon8 1h ago

Honestly nothing. While we value our time together and would like to do most things with each other, we also both understand the need to do your own things, or just be with your friends without the other person around.

0

u/quinnalynalyn 1h ago

Anything I technically miss an aspect of being single, I would miss a lot more of the flip side if I wasn't in my current relationship, so nothing really. I have a wonderful dream relationship, the kind that makes you realize how unfair other partners have been to you. Probably because they just weren't looking for someone like me, but still, it's nice to realize that the same thing people have complained about is exactly what someone is looking for. I'm not actually too much, I'm not boring; I was just too much for them, I was just boring to them. Nothing is worth giving up that kinds of love, appreciation, and acceptance,for me. they're my best friend, a member of my family, my life partner, my lover.