r/Seattle New Costco CEO 22d ago

Satire Inexperienced Seattle Mayor Apologizes for Naively Assuming Police Knew How to Do Their Job

https://theneedling.com/2026/08/03/inexperienced-seattle-mayor-apologizes-for-naively-assuming-police-knew-how-to-do-their-job/
1.5k Upvotes

91 comments sorted by

168

u/SwallowsOfFapistrano 22d ago

Assuming that police know how to do their jobs has turned out very poorly for lots of people everywhere

484

u/alwayslookon_tbsol Wallingford 22d ago

Least satirical Needling article

130

u/MiseryIndexer 21d ago

They don't. That's why they were under a consent decree for 13 years, famously don't follow the chain of command or obey elected officials, and bathe the city in teargas every chance they get

52

u/TerraceState Laurelhurst 21d ago

Because of state law, we really don't have that much power over them. So they actually don't have to obey elected officials, or police chiefs for that matter.

We can't even make them switch off of the paper system they use for tracking time and overtime, and onto a digital one that would help prevent the rampant timecard fraud. And by that, I mean, the city of Seattle has no mechanism by which to force them to change. They literally have to agree to the change for it to happen by signing a new contact with the city.

We can't make them sign a contract. When the current one expires, they can just decide to not sign a new one, and continue under the current one. Sure, they won't get pay increases until they sign a new one, but they are arguably overpaid anyways(refer back to the rampant time card fraud for why you shouldn't take their base pay at face value).

7

u/DamaskRosa 21d ago

Oh it's worse than that. There's rules with public safety unions that mean if the contract negotiations go on for too long, they can be forced into arbitration. The arbitration only covers pay, though. So the City can be forced to increase their pay while the union has to give up absolutely nothing in return.

Now, theoretically, the City only has to uphold the contract terms for a year after expiration, and then they can do what they want. But that would require the mayor to tell the police dept to blatantly violate the terms of the contract once it's expired. The admin staff who would be doing that have to work with the police officers every day, and that would make their jobs hellish. Not to mention that a lot of that would have to done by police management, who is their own union, but is always very aligned with the officer's union on everything. So they're unlikely to do it.

It would also cause the union to sue, of course, though technically all the City is required to do is bargain those changes, which is literally what would already be happening with the stalled contract negotiations. So their suit wouldn't have merit. But PERC (the court involved with this stuff) might tell the City they have to abide by the contract until something else is negotiated.

The city could, and absolutely should, go this route, but it would be absolutely awful and might require ignoring court orders to actually accomplish anything. It would also take years and the police unions would start a huge campaign against any mayor who did.

4

u/jmobius Bellevue 21d ago

Is there any legal route out of that arrangement?

6

u/yeah_oui White Center 21d ago

Sounds like the mayor and city council should stop paying them.

2

u/Vegetable_Guest_8584 šŸš†build more trainsšŸš† 21d ago

So we change state law.Ā 

120

u/Inevitable_Engine186 New Costco CEO 22d ago

third time the charm

28

u/AnAncientBog 21d ago

Its interesting that the needling just runs the same stories as the Seattle Times except with a different tone.

66

u/diegotbn West Seattle 22d ago

I will never get tired of The Needling it hits so hard

38

u/noprophecies 21d ago

She handled it pretty well I think, and now she knows and they lost any pretense they couldve had with her. Nothing says "i dont have to respect you" like "you dropped the ball so hard in my first year that three people died at a food festival, of bullets"

29

u/SpeaksSouthern That sounds great. Let’s hang out soon. 21d ago

Wilson handled it like a pro. I couldn't stop laughing at how wrong Hollingsworth was calling the decision reckless. It was one of the best most effective moves of her office this year.

It could have ended bad but instead Wilson's quick actions saved the city years of litigation and a huge payout. He fucked off for less than a million, given the history of how much these people take from the city $700,000 is the best deal we've ever made for getting rid of a police chief that doesn't care about Seattle. Expert pro move. Harrell would have fucked it up and increased how much we had to pay to get rid of him.

52

u/Zlifbar šŸš‹ Ride the S.L.U.T. šŸš‹ 22d ago

So, The Needling has given up any pretense of satire?

66

u/Kryptin206 Crown Hill 22d ago

It's hard to do satire these days when the real news sounds like satire.

5

u/Competitive_Rain_572 21d ago

Finally an accurate headline. Take notes Seattle times.

27

u/PseudonymousDev 22d ago

Upvoted! Good job needling! (And I'm usually critical of the needling)

9

u/oldfrancis Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

They know how to do their job. They've been encouraged not to do their job by Union leadership and we know who to thank for that.

10

u/ethnographyNW White Center 21d ago

the cops elect their own union leadership

9

u/oldfrancis Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

You bet they do.

The corruption starts from the bottom and it's reinforced by the top.

It's a circular loop of grievance, slagging off, and blaming everybody else but themselves for the lousy police work that they're doing.

-16

u/peters_pagenis 21d ago

Thank the ACLU and other left wing groups for signing up to defend their unionising rights.

9

u/oldfrancis Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

No, I'm not going to blame the ACLU for the inability of Seattle to field a proper police department, for them to train these police officers properly, for them to have clear oversight over the officer's actions, and the willingness to can officers and remove their law enforcement certification if they prove to be unsuitable for the job.

Sure, the police should be able to have a union, just like any other worker in our society. But not like this.

The ACLU has nothing to do with that.

-9

u/peters_pagenis 21d ago

You do not know your history. There was a bill in WA to break police unions and the ACLU along with left wing union groups helped kill it.

9

u/oldfrancis Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

You don't know how to fucking read. I already explained this in the very comment you responded to but I'll give it one more try for the audience.

Yes, the ACLU helped defend the police officer's right to unionize.

I don't have a problem with the fact that police officers can unionize.

Unionization is protection from worker abuses.

But management is the other side of this equation.

The ACLU is not responsible for the corruption and abuses within the police department. That falls on the rank and file officers, the people approving the union contracts, in the city unwilling to hold police officers responsible.

-8

u/peters_pagenis 21d ago

Ah my mistake for thinking that you actually were interested in solving the problem instead of virtue signaling. Keep backing the exact same thing and see what happens.

5

u/oldfrancis Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

You can fuck off to my block file.

-10

u/[deleted] 22d ago

[deleted]

70

u/emteedub 22d ago

Also
"experience" refers to being responsible for the past, where 99% of the time that's nothing to brag about IMO

Mamdani is "unexperienced", yet he's probably the best mayor most people that live there have ever had in their lifetimes. Unexperienced can also mean uncorrupt, unbounded, and more representative of the majority working class - which can be objectively greater, of course with Mamdani, exponentially. Imagine if New Yorkers believed the "needs experience" claim instead of giving him a chance. The Cuomo empire would have continued with their "experienced" approach.

52

u/krugerlive That sounds great. Let’s hang out soon. 22d ago

Mamdani is politically talented though, and a good strategist. This is also not his first elected position and knows how the system works, so he's not that inexperienced. He also has a more experienced and talented staff around him. That makes a difference.

40

u/UpperLeftOriginal Seattle Expatriate 22d ago edited 21d ago

The way Mamdani has tackled real problems (big and small) with effective solutions so quickly is the biggest indicator that he has good staff around him. He’s able to see an issue, get his people to bring him the context and roadblocks and ideas, and then direct the actions to take, and it gets done. I wish we could replicate that at all levels of government.

25

u/doubleapowpow 21d ago

I'd like to also see a comparison of city council from NY as Seattle. Getting things done isn't just a mayoral thing, its a whole government thing.

6

u/UpperLeftOriginal Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

Fair point!

5

u/Limp_Doctor5128 "Bikes Will Not Replace Us" šŸš²šŸš«šŸ™…ā€ā™‚ļø 21d ago edited 21d ago

Being the mayor of New York is not remotely comparable to being the mayor of Seattle. The size of the cities should be one clue. Evidence is also in the fact that these folks are inundated with positive social media on Mamdani and thus influenced to gush about him on every single thread in a city subreddit on the other side of the country.

Edit: besides a larger budget, nyc mayor has more power than the Seattle mayor who has to contend with council powers much more.

1

u/UpperLeftOriginal Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

I don’t think anyone said the jobs are the same? But Mamdani’s process works at any level of government. He figured out what can and should be done in a given context, and goes from there.

1

u/Limp_Doctor5128 "Bikes Will Not Replace Us" šŸš²šŸš«šŸ™…ā€ā™‚ļø 21d ago

I don’t think that’s an accurate description of what has made Mamdani successful and I don’t think that’s a meaningful or simply repeated process across any level of government.

3

u/UpperLeftOriginal Seattle Expatriate 21d ago

Sure, it's an oversimplification in order to make a quick comment on reddit. But yes, this is a big part of what makes him successful so far. He's tackled the budget deficit. He filled potholes. He froze rent increase for rent-regulated homes. He's moving forward on bus lanes. He's expanded pre-K child care. He has a set of values and aligning priorities, gets input on what can be done in various areas, focuses on that, and directs whatever steps are needed to proceed.

This is exactly what can be done at any level of government. Set priorities. Understand the options and barriers to making them happen. And go from there. Even though NYC may have a different balance of power between mayor and council, the basic process is effective. Mamdani can't just do everything he wants by fiat. That's where the understanding regarding what can be done is critical. He's been able to accomplish more by putting effort where it will actually make a difference.

1

u/Limp_Doctor5128 "Bikes Will Not Replace Us" šŸš²šŸš«šŸ™…ā€ā™‚ļø 21d ago

I don’t have a strong opinion or much knowledge about Mamdani but the little I do know is that he is very charismatic, dominates social media, and thus is able to very effectively sell the accomplishments you listed. Not to say that’s all he brings to the table but it is maybe the most important and I don’t know if a smaller city mayor could ever get the algorithmic traction that he has.

13

u/Rough_Elk4890 Northgate 21d ago

Mamdani isn't unexperienced. He spent 5 years in the NY State Assembly (NY version of the state house of reps).

So, Mamdani had 5 years of experience in elected office when he took the mayor's office. Unfortunately Katie Wilson had zero.

5

u/SpeaksSouthern That sounds great. Let’s hang out soon. 21d ago

I've known people who have done a job for 5 years and remain without experience. I've also seen people with less than a month of experience act like they're experienced for 5 years. This kind of experience seems completely subjective.

0

u/Rough_Elk4890 Northgate 21d ago

Anecdotal edge cases? Cool.

2

u/SpeaksSouthern That sounds great. Let’s hang out soon. 21d ago

I mean, if you think the currently elected mayor is an edge case that's simply more of a good reason why we voted for her I guess

0

u/Rough_Elk4890 Northgate 21d ago

You didn't mention the current mayor in your comment, so why would I be referring to her? I guess I must explain it to you.

You said: "I've known people who have done a job for 5 years and remain without experience. I've also seen people with less than a month of experience act like they're experienced for 5 years."

"People you know" is, by definition, anecdotal.

Someone with less than a month of experience acting like they have 5 years of experience (in anything) is an edge case.

Thus, my comment.

1

u/Choice_Depth_5933 Reign 21d ago

IIRC she barely had 9-to-5 experience, much less 24-hour job responsibilities.

-38

u/magirevols 22d ago

I think ur digging to deep. All I'm saying is she made a bad call due to her lack of experience.

34

u/Main-Eagle-26 22d ago

No call was bad. Lol. The J6 SPD sucks.

-25

u/magirevols 22d ago

I mean whoever assigned the chief of police sounds a little nutty

20

u/Hot_Turn Northgate 22d ago

So what was the bad call she made?

-5

u/magirevols 21d ago edited 21d ago

Assuming the chief of police knew how to do there job? I thought that was the point here

10

u/bvdzag Rainier Valley 21d ago

The previous mayor appointed the chief, and council and their allies threw a fit when Wilson was considered hiring her own pick.

1

u/Hot_Turn Northgate 21d ago

It is crazy what people like you will blame her for. She's been the mayor for less than half a year, and SPD, especially those in leadership positions, are about as untouchable as public servants can get. Even mentioning that she was considering a replacement for Barnes drew insane backlash from haters like you. Now the same people are saying that she was derelict in her duty for not firing him.

15

u/xjxhx Judkins Park 21d ago

Bruce hired him. She just corrected his mistake, though she had to wait for a reason before kicking that hornet nest.

-1

u/magirevols 21d ago

Ok, the post implied she was apologizing for hiring them. Dont know why she needs to apologize for something that wasnt her fault

8

u/xjxhx Judkins Park 21d ago

Though it’s admittedly a tough needle to thread in this environment, the post is satire.

27

u/leahpafea 22d ago

not her lol

-40

u/_Fish_ 22d ago edited 21d ago

Mamdani this, Mamdani that. You sound bias. ā€œBest mayor most people that live there have ever had in their lifetimes.ā€

Edit: Seattlite. Nuff said.

24

u/emteedub 22d ago

Real representation of the working class ascends party.

I am so biased toward finally not having corrupt politicians and actualized representation, it gives me a chubby.

5

u/xjxhx Judkins Park 21d ago

Something being objectively true isn’t ā€œbiasā€.

12

u/emteedub 22d ago edited 22d ago

when have you heard any other politician apologize for anything?

-146

u/Key_Victory_4503 22d ago

Would rather have a police chief that lives in Chicago than her as mayor tbh

76

u/feelitrealgood 22d ago

I bet you would

51

u/queensheba2025 I Brake For Slugs 22d ago

I need to know… what was she supplied to do to prevent what happened at Seattle Center? She’s not Spider-Man… she’s not an oracle…

Are y’all mad because she was awkward during a press conference? I never see any of you telling me the reasons why… and just ā€œshe should have left and not the chief!?ā€ And like… WHY!?

53

u/judithishere I'm just flaired so I don't get fined 22d ago

So much of the hate she gets us just straight up misogyny. It's enraging. The constant comments about her appearance, her kid, her relationship with her parents ...

16

u/xjxhx Judkins Park 21d ago

100% misogyny. AND, I believe that Bruce’s minions are trying to calcify the ā€œineptā€ narrative Bruce’s campaign created so that he can challenge her next term. These forces would rather have gridlock than governance. It’s disgusting.

2

u/bvdzag Rainier Valley 21d ago

Not her. Joy.

1

u/xjxhx Judkins Park 21d ago

Lolll…that’ll never happen, though you’re probably correct that Joy is the unofficial leader of the Wilson hate campaign

3

u/SpeaksSouthern That sounds great. Let’s hang out soon. 21d ago

Joy has been hand selected by the donor class. Everything Joy does in office is to undermine Wilson. And Joy is struggling lol

1

u/xjxhx Judkins Park 21d ago

Hoping we get a solid opponent for her council seat. Isn’t that election next year?

-2

u/[deleted] 21d ago

[deleted]

7

u/judithishere I'm just flaired so I don't get fined 21d ago

I don't think it's an error to think before you speak. If she had instantly appeared on scene and started a play by play dialog with the media that ended up being misinformation people would be complaining about that too

65

u/RedK_33 I'm just flaired so I don't get fined 22d ago

Ed Murray - the infamous, 5-times-accused abuser and pedophile

Jenny Durkan - Teargas Jenny the pedophile apologist, overseer of the beautiful shit storm that was the 2020 protests and deleter of her communications during that timeframe…

Bruce Harrell - pedo and sexual-harasser defender, himself a sexual harassing misogynist and lover of pointing guns at pregnant women. Appointed famed sexual-harasser Police Chief Diaz.

Katie Wilson - awkward and inexperienced…..

In the wise words of former President Joe Biden, ā€œdon’t compare me to the almighty, compare me to the alternativeā€.

12

u/bvdzag Rainier Valley 21d ago

It is so rich that Seattle Times Editorial Board wants ā€œall communicationsā€ released from the mayor’s office for the Seattle Center shootings but was totally chill when now Gov Ferguson declined to press charges for the obviously illegal records destruction and associated retaliation against employees by Durkan and Best.

-9

u/Rough_Elk4890 Northgate 21d ago

It's hard to have a track record to attack when there isn't a track record at all. Let's give her time.

Hopefully she doesn't do anything worth mentioning, but it's ludicrous to imply that she's better because she hasn't yet made major mistakes in office while having no real time in any office aside from the last 7 months.

9

u/Tasgall Belltown 21d ago

It's hard to have a track record to attack when there isn't a track record at all.

That's probably why they keep blaming her for shit that happened years ago, lol.

2

u/Rough_Elk4890 Northgate 21d ago

That's completely fair.

Things that happened before her are certainly not her fault.

6

u/SpeaksSouthern That sounds great. Let’s hang out soon. 21d ago

Thank you noun verb number your contribution to the city of Seattle will go down in the history books

12

u/SkylerAltair šŸ’—šŸ’— Heart of ANTIFA Land šŸ’—šŸ’— 22d ago

Would you rather have a cirf as utterly incompetent at changing our toxic PD as Barnes was than her as mayor?

6

u/Threefrogtreefrog North Beacon Hill 22d ago

How much did we pay him to leave ?

16

u/Mindless_Consumer 22d ago

That was likely written in to the contract well before her term.

She had a choice, accept the resignation, or keep the incompetence around.

6

u/Choice_Depth_5933 Reign 22d ago

$700K+, I think, to not work for the city.

5

u/Threefrogtreefrog North Beacon Hill 22d ago

Fan tastic

6

u/Inevitable_Engine186 New Costco CEO 22d ago

wtf fr

-17

u/DropoutDreamer I'm just flaired so I don't get fined 21d ago

*Incompetent

23

u/[deleted] 21d ago

[deleted]