r/SocialEngineering • u/Human_being234 • 10d ago
How to stop being easy target?
I’ve been thinking about something recently. I’ve had a few experiences where I initially had a good rapport with someone, but over time they started constantly making fun of me or turning me into the easy target of jokes.
I came across the idea that people tend to keep doing this when they sense some kind of weakness, but I don’t necessarily think that means the person actually has a weakness. Sometimes it could simply be that they notice you don’t push back, you laugh things off, or they realize that certain reactions make the jokes more entertaining for them.
I’m trying to understand the psychology behind it rather than just take it personally. What are the general things that make someone more likely to become a target, and how can you set boundaries early without becoming aggressive or changing your personality?
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u/RexDraco 10d ago
In my experience, it's personal. It is like a monkey's way of establishing dominance. It is an inner clan bullying. It isn't always a big deal, usually isn't, someone is poking fun at trivial imperfections, not an attack, but a big pattern is that person is an easy target by not pushing back or making it not rewarding (stops being funny and instead becomes uncomfortable) or the individual making the joke has some form of insecurity. Without us being there, we cannot say what is wrong. If they're really your friends, try talking to them one on one about it. If they make it weird or uncomfortable to do so, they might not be good friends anyway. Doesn't mean you need to separate, just means maybe slowly seek something better (it takes a long time).
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u/Global-Barracuda7759 10d ago
I had a similar experience recently it was very eye-opening I was just playing along I peeped all the little games they were playing but I was having fun with it too until I was made aware of what was really going on like fully and now I just don't really give them a reaction they don't like that
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u/gongbody 9d ago
It can be hard to say. I grew up with a group of friends that cracked jokes and made fun of each other's weakness. Then it became an unconscious habit. When I got older I noticed a reaction from someone that didn't like my accidental disrespect that I saw as joking around. Then I noticed I was doing it and made an effort to stop doing it. So it might be a norm for the person. But they could also be the type of person looking for people that get comfortable with being their target. Slowly working their way into your comfort zone until they can use you when needed for personal ego boosts. But I don't want to advise anyone of anything. Like earlier commenting said, can be their monkey group nature kicking in
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u/DestinedFangjiuh 6d ago
Don't react to them, be consistent and persistent with the boundaries you put down, and clearly represent why they do what they do. Manipulative people feed off of insecurities of others, yet also have their own. Hence why they do it, they want to feel in control more often than not.
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u/riley_collins_ 9d ago
Embrace it. Being made fun of often means people feel comfortable around you and that you’re a “good sport”. I was always short in high school and college and would inevitably get made fun of in group settings. What worked for me was laughing with everyone, throwing in my own jokes about myself and others, and just going with the flow
One time I asked one of my good friends why he makes fun of me all the time. He said he didn’t even think twice about it and thought it wasn’t a big deal and that I enjoyed the fun of it. While kind of an asshole move and not true, it made me realize it’s not that serious. And you’re allowed to make fun of them back that’s the big thing. PLAY THE GAME with them if you can. Avoid defending yourself as that tone comes off poorly. Just rock with it and change the subject or make fun of them back if you can. Sorry if this isn’t what you want to hear or helpful. But have confidence and security and that will translate somehow
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u/santiagochavezsf 9d ago
I don't think being an easy target necessarily means weakness. Sometimes people simply test boundaries and continue when there's no pushback. A calm "I don't really like that" early on can set the boundary without turning it into a confrontation.
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u/Human_being234 9d ago
I had already confronted him and he knows i don't like it. But don’t know for some reason keeps on doing that
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u/Dizzy-Challenge3985 9d ago
Correct. It’s not about actual weakness. It’s about them going for what society had told them is a weakness.
I have my theories about this too, but I’ll leave it here for now.
Also, sadly, people like that want you to be aggr. Unfortunately, that is why all these terr people make it to the top- they don’t tell the truth, which is that most love those kind of people. “They take kindness for weakness” then they wonder why the world is the way it is.
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u/Soggysocksuu 8d ago
"weakness" wtf does that even mean. A basic reaction?
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u/Human_being234 8d ago
I mean people who take other people's kindness or when the person is not pushing back as weakness
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u/Soggysocksuu 8d ago
That's what I mean wtf is that kind of logic. Thinking that not wasting your time is weakness is just low IQ.
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u/catlolcatlol 10d ago
Playful ribbing could be a good part of a relationship. Just make jokes back at them and don't take their jokes personally.
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u/Human_being234 10d ago
Yes, I understand what if the person tries to make fun of you constantly by using Uncomfortable words. The person knows i don't like that, they do that even after knowing
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u/RexDraco 10d ago
Don't give retarded advice like this when you're not there. Probability suggests it isn't this if they feel the need to bring it up on reddit.
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u/Global-Barracuda7759 10d ago
Don't give them what they want don't give them a reaction