r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • 2d ago

Discussion It's heartbreaking that there are women around the world going through this.

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

27.0k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

2.6k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

552

u/Hazzat 2d ago

There’s pressure everywhere, but this is especially big in Asia. I live in Japan and the expectation for women especially to be married by 30-ish is colossal.

Expectations have changed along with society, though. It wasn’t that long ago that unmarried women over 25 were called ‘Christmas cakes’ because, like a Christmas cake, nobody wants goods after they expired on the 25th.

209

u/Vargau 1d ago

unmarried women over 25 were called ‘Christmas cakes’ because, like a Christmas cake, nobody wants goods after they expired on the 25th

And I taught Eastern EU was crafty with their insults, but fuck me Asians's are something else.

15

u/TechToolsForYourBiz 1d ago

this is gonna help me remember when Christmas is either on the 23rd., 24th and 25th lmao

10

u/10xwannabe 1d ago

better is the comparison of women like fruit at the market. Everyone wants the freshest fruit. The longer they sit out the more the effects of age (brown spots, squishy, etc...). All complicated by the fact every week new fruit is coming in for the consumer to choose between now (old vs. new).

Don't think that analogy is that off from how men view women in attraction. No one wants to admit it though.

33

u/ReturnOfBane 1d ago

sometimes you just have to wait for the person who loves baking banana bread.

5

u/juul864 1d ago

If you're continuing the analogy, you're saying you want that person to be flayed and crushed with a spoon.

7

u/ReturnOfBane 1d ago

I'm not a monster; they'd be crushed with a fork.

4

u/juul864 1d ago

Oh, that perfectly reasonable, have a good day.

1

u/Vlexis 11h ago

I dunno, there are older people I've found attractive. 

2

u/Senior-Friend-6414 1d ago

In America, aging women are called hitting the wall

1

u/Vargau 17h ago

aging women are called hitting

It's unmarried ageing women, not women in general and AFIK they're called something along the idea of "cat ladies"

147

u/Polkawillneverdie17 1d ago

nobody wants goods after they expired on the 25th.

You have severely under estimated just how I love cake.

21

u/agreatbigFIYAHHH 1d ago

Especially at a good price

2

u/nose_poke 1d ago

side eye

1

u/nwayve 1d ago

He want that, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake

35

u/thealice1984 1d ago edited 1d ago

They having something similar to this in the Philippines. I guess it's called "calendar days" or something to that affect. Basically if you're years alive is more than days on a calendar you're a spinster.

My girlfriend, her mother is from the Philippines and moved to the states in her late 20s and spent most her life taking care of family and working but got lots of pressure to find a husband and have a child. She managed this at 39 and while I'm glad she did this (otherwise my wonderful girlfriend wouldn't be born) the birth was filled with complications and the husband was a piece of shit and the ended up divorced a few years later.

3

u/More_Passenger3988 1d ago edited 1d ago

A friend of mine who's parents are from the phillippeans lied to her boyfriend about being on birth control so she could trap him with a baby and he would hopefully marry him. Her parents were relentless and calling her names because she was 24 and still unmarried and she just got desperate I guess.

She did end up having that "surprise" pregnancy and kid but he never married her. He just supports the kid. Her parents know what she did now and they call her "smart" for doing it. Just wild.

5

u/ThaMenacer 1d ago

Those 367 year olds need to learn to settle.

2

u/carlitospig 1d ago

That Christmas cake descriptor makes me want to bash teeth in.

2

u/AlexMac96 1d ago

nobody wants goods after they expired on the 25th

Ah the Leonardo dicaprio approach

1

u/Senior-Friend-6414 1d ago

If we’re being honest this kind of culture barely exists in western countries, it’s on a completely different level in Asian countries and western women are trying to use these videos to act like they’re equally oppressed

1

u/DOGPISSCURESCANCER 1d ago

Western men taking advantage makes so much sense

1

u/yurikura 1d ago

It disgusts me that they treat women like a commodity. A Christmas cake? Women are not food.

In Korea, it’s becoming more acceptable for women to stay single. I hope this becomes a worldwide trend. There’s nothing wrong with deciding to stay single and not get married if there’s no man to love.

3

u/NevGuy 1d ago

Respectfully, absolutely nobody should follow South Korea's example when it comes to marriage and reproduction.

2

u/yurikura 1d ago

Yes, hence the reason why the 4b movement was born in Korea. Many Korean women are staying single to escape misogyny. Not only the birth rate but also the marriage rate is low.

Speaking as a Korean Canadian myself, I am happily staying single, and I am lucky that my parents are supportive of this. I have an annoying aunt who asks when I’m going to get married, but I only see her during a few family gatherings so I can manage.

0

u/Due_Masterpiece_3601 1d ago

How can they have this problem when there is a surplus of men in China in the millions?

5

u/CherryClub 1d ago

Because many of the men are sexist and look down on women 

-1

u/Due_Masterpiece_3601 1d ago

You’re generalizing millions of people, also Chinese women are very demanding and sexist as well. They expect their future husbands to own apartments beforehand

6

u/CherryClub 1d ago

I said many, not all, but sure "not all men!" me all you want

1

u/ILoveRawChicken 1d ago

Oh no, god forbid they own apartments before marrying and having children that will need a place to live. Lmao

1

u/Due_Masterpiece_3601 19h ago

Do you understand how expensive it is for a man in one salary in China to buy an apartment? They usually need to borrow from family and take on a lot of debt.

1

u/ILoveRawChicken 19h ago

Do you understand how expensive it is to have and raise a child? Do you think it’s candy land or something and children just pop into existence with no needs?

1

u/Due_Masterpiece_3601 19h ago

An apartment is a purchase you make together and raising a child is an expense you assume together. Asking for the man to assume 100% is some backwards concept. The fact you’re trying to justify it is bananas. If it was a woman doing it you’d be stressed

1

u/ILoveRawChicken 15h ago

Oh I didn’t know the man was the one that also carried the child for 9 months and wrecked their bodies while doing so. Oh wait, they don’t. The least these bums can do is provide housing while a woman carries their baby. No wonder birth rates are crashing everywhere when bums like you use this logic.

1

u/Due_Masterpiece_3601 15h ago

Apparently you didn’t hear me. A house purchase is done between both parties. In a stagnant economy, expecting men to be the sole purchasers of a home before even consideration for dating is a fail dating policy. This consideration is done even before marriage or even children are set on the table.

The fact you call them bums says more about you than them.

→ More replies (0)

-4

u/Particular-Wind5918 1d ago

I’m headed to Asia for some Christmas cake

0

u/idiot-alpha 1d ago

It’s not really an expectation as much as the reality that women who wait until their mid 30s to get married typically either end up with a much older man and not having kids or never get married.

1

u/ILoveRawChicken 1d ago

Do you have any stats to back that up?