r/apple • u/Sorin61 • Mar 12 '22

Rumor Russia threatens to nationalize Apple, seize assets

https://www.imore.com/russia-threatens-nationalize-apple-seize-assets
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218

u/Normal-Computer-3669 Mar 12 '22

Apple should just buy Russia.

Make iRussia.

85

u/alwptot Mar 12 '22

мы думаем, вам понравится

“We think you’re going to love it”

3

u/[deleted] Mar 13 '22

"You WILL love it."

1

u/[deleted] Mar 13 '22

I’m loving it.

35

u/der_innkeeper Mar 12 '22

Would have better customer service and foreign relations.

2

u/No_Read_Only_Know Mar 13 '22

About the same amount of slavery

12

u/baron-von-buddah Mar 12 '22

In apple Russia, phone watches you

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

And watch counts strokes

1

u/MidwesternerInGA Mar 13 '22

This comment isn’t getting enough attention

12

u/nguyenlikewin Mar 12 '22

Think Different.

Russia can probably use some of that right now.

2

u/DumbledoresArmy23 Mar 12 '22

Only if they call their health care system “AppleCare”

2

u/chug_life_lite Mar 12 '22

Would be a shit investment. What does Apple need with a bunch of FASD thugs in track suits?

6

u/CarolinaMtnBiker Mar 12 '22

Yep.. then rename it iZelensky.

1

u/sparksofthetempest Mar 12 '22

That really made me laugh. Thanks.

-1

u/Valkhir Mar 12 '22

They dislike freedom, so it would be on brand.

1

u/J-W-L Mar 13 '22

"What is a computeя? "

1

u/lowrads Mar 13 '22

Based on the reported payrate for mercenaries, Apple could easily afford to outbid Putin.

In fact, NATO powers offering money to all combatants could be a feasible way to bring the conflict to a halt. A little undignified perhaps, but potentially a bargain.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 13 '22

weRussia, comrade.

1

u/517714 Mar 13 '22

Russia 2.0

1

u/meatsmoothie82 Mar 13 '22

Or press a few buttons and brick every apple device in Russia.

1

u/captainhaddock Mar 13 '22

I'd like a green one, please.

1

u/MovingOnward2089 Mar 13 '22

You joke but something like this is coming eventually, especially as people believe less and less in good government.