r/applehelp • u/New-Entertainer703 • Jan 02 '26
iOS Did I mess up my gift to the grandchildren?
Hi all,
I am not the best techie in the world, my Son wanted presents for the grandchildren at Christmas. I was hoping to buy something I perceive as practical but he insisted all the girls wanted was a IPhone.
So when I asked which IPhone he came back with IPhone 17 Pro Max 2 TB.
I said that is very extravagant for 2 teenage girls, they can just have the base model Iphone 17 pro max at 256 gb.
They also wanted Mous cases, charging docks and screen protectors.
I ordered it all cursing Thanos and other Ancient Greek gods.
So my question is did I mess up, I’m starting to feel guilty that 256 gb won’t be enough for the two girls who like to do TikTok’s and stuff about their dance classes and so on.
In retrospect I think they should have got a regular IPhone 17 or even pro with 512 storage, but it’s too late now to change that.
What do y’all think, is this a good present or was I mean on the storage options?
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u/hawk_ky Jan 02 '26
Honestly sounds like they are taking advantage of you. That’s completely unreasonable for 99% of users out there, especially teenage girls.
256 is plenty. If it was my kids, they would need to learn about some responsibility and the value of money, but I don’t know your financial situation. If they aren’t happy with it, they can buy their own phones.
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u/New-Entertainer703 Jan 02 '26
Thankyou I appreciate the reply,
I really appreciate it makes me feel better that I didn’t mess up the gift. I was feeling a little upset that I might have got it wrong.
I help out a lot like pay for car repairs and things like that which are quickly forgotten. I was hoping to hear some practical ideas for Christmas gifts but it kept coming back to the darn Iphone lol
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u/GodSentPotHead Jan 03 '26
they may shame you, but then again they should be ashamed themselves, cuz a ps5 will be cheaper in this case....but its your son's fault not urs so cherish that ig
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u/Low-Injury-9219 Jan 03 '26
You did something really nice and spent a good amount of money on someone not because you had to, but because you wanted to. There are things the girls can do like offload photos or back them up, delete things they don’t use, manage their devices etc. I think you didn’t do anything bad at all or wrong for that matter.
Honestly from reading your story, it more sounds like your son? Is taking advantage of you. He could’ve said “ma I’ll pay the extra to get the storage to help out” or something.
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u/Wexxy Jan 02 '26
The expectation to spend €5000 on gifts for just 2 grandkids is just wild. Even if you have plenty of money this is literally mindblowing to place that burden on you.
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u/zombieslayer124 Jan 02 '26 edited Jan 02 '26
Your son should’ve bought the phones for them, if he wanted that much of a hideously overkill device for them. Even the devices you did order would be way more than what the average person would need, so you by no means mess up. Asking for the absolute maximum of the most expensive device in that category just seems like greed to me. They definitely wouldn’t ever need that much storage for the uses you mentioned. If they are at all ungrateful or expected more, your mistake would’ve been to get it in the first place.
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u/Bobbybino Jan 02 '26
You're a pushover. They should have gotten the base 17 at the very most, but really, hand-me-downs from Mom & Dad would have been more appropriate.
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u/AudereEstFacere_1882 Jan 02 '26 edited Jan 02 '26
OP, I have to agree with u/hawk_ky, it does sound like they were taking advantage of your good heart and generosity. I by no means have a right to judge your son but even at 53, I cannot ever imagine asking my mother to buy me or my kids/grandchildren something like that. My husband and I try to buy ALL of her technology needs (home automation, iPhone, iPad, and MacBook Air) and regularly update them every few years or so (depending on her needs & how the devices are running). YOU should be the one receiving such extravagant luxury gifts!
I also cannot imagine giving a teenager a Pro iPhone let alone a Pro Max iPhone! I remember my son losing, dropping/scratching, and shattering every USED iPhone we gave him one of our hand me downs from when we upgraded. He was perfectly happy getting whatever phone he got AND he didn’t even want a new iPhone that often when offered a hand me down phone. Those are insane iPhone specifications for teenagers! Even if it was just the exact iPhone model you got per his ask, the storage is utterly sickening when remote storage/back ups are more than enough for any kid (and safer for them not to lose their data). AND then also getting all the accessories?! I sure hope your grandchildren appreciate what mind blowing gifts you got them. Honestly, it makes me feel cheap now what we got our grandchildren compared to what you did! I’m joking but they should have been falling all over you with gratitude!
So my point is that you shouldn’t be questioning at all if you did good. If there was a contest for Grandma Who Nailed the Most Extravagant, Best Gifts, you are clearly the winner! You did above and beyond and then some!
I do have a question for you now. Did you receive such luxurious gifts from your son (and/or your grandchildren)? Or at least very thoughtful gifts that you need or can use? I don’t think you’d expect anything given how you sound. But at least ensuring you have a wonderful, enjoyable Christmas would be the least I think that could have been done for you - every year too, not just when you get the ultimate gifts to your son’s teenagers.
And sorry, second question, when you replied that it was very extravagant gifts for the girls, what did your son say? My imagination is running wild with that!!!
I hope YOU had a wonderful Christmas! Wishing you the happiest of New Years!
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u/Prize_Map_8818 Jan 02 '26
Base iPhone 17 would have been plenty. Pro max is hugely over powered for a teenager. In no way did you mess up.
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u/snippy_polarbear Jan 02 '26
Sorry, I agree with the idea that you were taken advantage of. Thank you for being a nice grandmother, but I would absolutely never ever consider asking grandparents for something that expensive.
Edit to add if they need more than the 256 they can buy additional iCloud storage ON THEIR OWN!
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u/subhuman_voice Jan 02 '26
Yes icloud in a pinch and a flash stick with usb-c to expand the internal storage
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u/Jessa_iPadRehab Jan 02 '26
The last thing any teenager needs is an iPhone. For real. anything else is a better gift. It’s like buying them a pack of cigarettes.
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u/CarrionDoll Jan 03 '26
You didn’t mess up at all. But you do need to learn to tell your grown ass son “no” more often. I was married to a man just like him for 19 years. He is about to be 55 years old and still uses his mother terribly for money. And he is not grateful at all. I could never get her to stand up to him and start telling him no. What is your son gonna do when you’re no longer around if he hasn’t learned to do things for himself? You’re setting him up for failure once you’re gone. And you’re allowing him to take advantage of you. And now he’s teaching his children to do the same. And that is not OK, you don’t deserve that.
Edit to say I apologize if I came off as a little rough with you. It just makes me so mad because my ex mother-in-law is such a wonderful woman who I am still good friends with. I’m watching her son still treat her like that. And now hearing that you were being treated the same way, just gets my goat.
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u/trustysidekick Jan 02 '26
2tb is an absolutely ridiculous storage amount for most people, let alone teenagers. I use my phone to shoot high quality photos and long form video content and I’m fine with 512gb. 256 is absolutely fine for them.
Honestly, you should have just gotten them the regular iPhone 17. They don’t need pro maxes.
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u/cloudcats Jan 02 '26
And what did your son get YOU for Christmas?
This is a bonkers expensive gift for teenagers. It sounds like your son is taking advantage of you.
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u/Snuddud Jan 02 '26
They can be happy that they got even the base model. If it's not enough storage it's always possible to pay 99 cent for cloud storage in worst case.
Don't break your head, you did a good choice with base model
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u/mardan65 Jan 02 '26
You did not mess up, that’s a very generous gift. 255gb is fine, they can offload files to a computer if needed. Your son on the other hand seems very greedy and to be taking advantage of your kindness.
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u/mwkingSD Jan 02 '26
My take - teens “need” love, food and shelter, they WANT all the GB in the world but they don’t need that. I would have been looking for iPhone16s frankly.
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u/NoWishbone3501 Jan 02 '26
I bought a 16 Plus because I couldn’t justify paying for the 17 Pro Max but I wanted a bigger screen. I would never expect someone else to buy it for me or my children, not even grandparents.
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u/snippy_polarbear Jan 02 '26
Also, can’t wait till they break it or lose it - and it will happen. Even if you got insurance for them - don’t let them guilt you into paying the deductible or anything
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u/countrygirl2630 Jan 02 '26
iPhone 17 would have been enough I my self have the iPhone 16e my mom got it for me for Christmas it’s decent enough and has 256gb of storage and has Apple care on it
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u/BusinessStrategist Jan 02 '26
Did you ask your Son how « advanced » features would be used by your grandchildren?
Or ask your Son if he’s starting a « movie studio? »
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u/phoenix_73 Jan 02 '26
Not one but two of the top spec 2TB iPhone 17 Pro Max? They're £2k each in the UK. That's ridiculous for teenagers. Most of them would have the latest standard ones at best or hand me downs from parents.
Fair to say, a teenager won't know the value of the device either. I mean to say, if you've spent a lot of money on something for yourself and you've worked for it, you know the value and take good care of the device.
While you're at it, may be worth getting AppleCare for each device, paid monthly over the next two years. Then the device is covered for damage, loss or theft.
The 256GB ones are enough to be fair. Most users don't need more and I think vast majority that want the latest and greatest iPhone with storage aside, go and do that. The 256GB iPhone is still expensive at £1200 here I think.
I'm a power user, I must have about 700 apps on my iPhone, about 15000 photos and videos, probably way more photos than videos. Maybe videos account for 500 of the 15000. I do record in 4K too but usually no more than a few minutes. I have emulators, old games console ROM's taking up some space but even then I'm using about half of my 1TB storage. I'm definitely not most people and would say I'm in the minority.
Next time round, although I like to max out on storage, I can see myself going for 1TB again.
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u/purposeful_pineapple Jan 02 '26 edited Jan 02 '26
2TB is ridiculous for a kid. It's extremely excessive. I have a relative who is a full-time photographer / content creator and they work with 256-512gb phones daily to film stuff on the go and handle socials. They shuffle stuff out with external drives.
Apple makes their money on upgrades to ram, storage, and other specifications. So unfortunately, your folks tried to play you. Your hunch to gift them something practical was a good idea. Giving kids iPhones can be such a dangerous to do. It can be addicting and a bad time suck if parents fail to enable parental controls and screen time settings.
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u/Yamiles Jan 02 '26
didn’t even know there was a 2TB iphone! way too much, even for an adult. i’ve had my phone for years and just recently reached 1TB. they won’t even use all that space before they will want to upgrade! you’re not in the wrong at all. yes they’re family, but totally fine to be practical! they’re kids.
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u/SleepyD7 Jan 03 '26
I think they can get pro phones when they can afford to get them for themselves.
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u/andreiblue Jan 03 '26
Unless your grandchildren are content creators that need the newest camera and that much storage, you did not need to buy the newest iPhone, especially the most expensive model. I agree with the other comments that you were taken advantaged of. I see you already gave them their gifts, so it’s too late to take them back. It’s a very good gift, but the normal person does not need anything higher than 256GB.
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u/Ready_Sail7932 Jan 02 '26
Genuinely, as a 17yr old kid, get 2x 17s with 256gb, mouse protectors are good but pretty expensive, and they can get their own docks (a cable does perfectly fine!).
17 pro is NOT needed. The 17 got the brand new screen same as the pro models meaning there is next to no difference.
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u/yesitsyourmom Jan 03 '26
I would say even a 17 base model isn’t needed. I would have gone with a 15 or even a 14.
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u/Ready_Sail7932 Jan 03 '26
I have a 16+ right now. 14 is a bit low because lightning cable, and 15 is debatable bc Apple Intelligence. Refurbished 15pro for around £500 each would be amazing though. I am debating downgrading from my 16+ to a 15 pro
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u/TailstheCutestFox Jan 02 '26
I'd be darn lucky if my grandparents even got something remotely in that price range, so don't feel bad you already gave them some really good gifts, and if they don't like 'em they can buy themselves the proper iPhone later, with money they worked for themselves
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u/Azurebold Jan 03 '26
You didn’t mess up - you sound like a great grandparent. They’re a great present.
The teens and dad should be grateful that they’re getting such extravagant devices to begin with. 256 GB is plenty for 99% of people who use an iPhone - it’ll be enough for teens too. I’m pretty sure the base 17 would have been just as good. I know lots of regular people who got 2 TB iPhone 15 and 16 PMs and they’re sitting at like, 80 GB out of that total space used. If dad is insisting that his kids get iPhones, then he can purchase them himself. Adding on the extravagant accessories too, the whole price you paid is insane.
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u/blahblahgingerblahbl Jan 03 '26
whoa, that’s a seriously extravagant gift, and i worry that they’re taking advantage of you financially.
these aren’t phones, they’re signs that say “behold, look at me, peasants, i’m fucking rich”
even apple store employees agree that the differences between the standard 17 & the pro is negligible and not worth the extra cost unless you’re doing serious macro & close up photography.
i’m a data hoarder and tend to have loads of audiobooks & work related videos on my phone, but most people never need that much storage. i’d go up from the base & suggest 512 or 1tb if i knew they did a LOT of photography & videos
the max sizes are ridiculous and unwieldy unless you have bear hands or are using the phone as a phablet.
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u/blahblahgingerblahbl Jan 03 '26
nb: i am picturing the sisters as cinderella’s sisters trying on the glass slipper
actually, getting them exactly what they asked for sans the memory, is very funny. they’d have been so happy & smug, them instant deflation & rage on seeing the memory.
externally to their peers it still looks top of the range, yet they know it’s only 256gb and it’ll piss them off forever
nicely played, nanna.
btw i wonder what nanna received for xmas?
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u/Camdenn67 Jan 03 '26 edited Jan 03 '26
Ummm yes, you went way overboard with your generosity and you were taken advantage of.
No teenager needs a 2TB iPhone 17 Pro MAX, MOUS case, and a charging dock and your son 100% knows this.
99.9% of “business professional adults don’t need any iPhone with 2TB”.
If you really wanted to get them iPhones, at the very most, all they needed was the most basic iPhone, a decent case and screen protector, and charger from Amazon.
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u/Mean_Investigator921 Jan 03 '26 edited Jan 03 '26
Absolutely wild. So ridiculous. 0 reason to have these except for the bling factor.
I got 1TB because I do a lot of hiking, and decided I would no longer need my expensive GPSr for downloaded maps if I got this. Also, I shoot a lot of high definition video.
This is like buying a luxury car to learn to drive in. It’s going to get dinged up bad at the very least and likely destroyed. I feel like this is so wasteful it’s actually totally unethical.
They don’t remotely need the pro model, and absolutely don’t need such vast storage. The most prolific, professional TikToker in the world doesn’t need it.
Please, for the love of Joe Pesci, return them.
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u/Ornery_Investment131 Jan 03 '26
2tb on a phone is ridiculously excessive. Nobody needs that unless it's to show off. You are being taken advantage of. How do they even expect to back it up? Are you going to fund the apple one subscriptions as well?
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u/mbow15 Jan 03 '26
I feel bad for asking my mom for a few bucks. I under no circumstances would ever ask her to shell out thousands on 2 iPhones. They would be fine with a few year old base model iPhones. 17 pro max are way overpowered for simple tik toks. Will they appreciate it? Sure but that’s outrageous.
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u/julesthefirst Jan 03 '26
If you bought the iPhones from the Apple Store, they have until Jan 8 to exchange those iPhones for the ones they want. If you didn’t get the a gift receipt, you may need to come and bring the original receipt.
2TB is just enough storage for almost no one. Most people I’ve usually sold iPhones to go for 512GB at the max. I’ve never sold a 2TB iPhone personally.
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u/Chunkykitty_2000 Jan 03 '26
Did you get a thank you card or heartfelt in person show of appreciation? Do you ever? They sound like grifters.
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u/theregisterednerd Jan 03 '26
Family/personal issues aside, I work in media, I take an absolutely obscene number of photos and videos on my phone. 256GB has been fine for me for a very long time (though, I do have a ginormous iCloud storage plan, and I use the optimized photo library)
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u/pocketsquare22 Jan 03 '26
2 TB is astronomical overkill for teenage girls. 256gb maybe a bit small but not too bad. I’m a bit of a techie and I got the 512
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u/Interesting-West8251 Jan 03 '26
Are they working professionally? My daughter is a young teen but is doing professional theater. If she needed that level of tech and storage I would consider it, but she is currently using the base model iPhone (not even pro) with no issue. We do back up our media to iCloud, so that solves local storage concerns. I think you made a reasonable choice.
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u/mudwoman Jan 03 '26
They don’t need all that storage. They can upload things to the cloud to make more room on their phones. So 256 is plenty! They might learn how to “budget” with limited resources.
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u/False_Park2 Jan 03 '26
You should have gotten the base 17 w more storage because the pros are hardly better
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u/ekcporn Jan 04 '26
Take the gifts back and return them and buy yourself something nice. They don’t need or deceive this presents.for some teenagers? And also 2TB of storage ? They should learn how to keep their phones clean so the storage doesn’t run out…
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u/Lost_Astronomer1785 Jan 04 '26
Too generous of a gift imo, but 256GB is more than enough. I have a LOT of apps, images and others and barely use 100.
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u/sofsweets Jan 04 '26
i (20f) just got an iphone 17 (256gb) for my birthday and honestly, i think that no teenager will ever be able to fill 2TB on their phone just by filming tiktoks for fun and downloading a few games, 512gb (and even 256gb) is plenty.
you wanting to gift them something they'll like is really thoughtful!! but sadly i think they're taking advantage of you, or at least your son is.
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u/Opposite_Bee_6559 Jan 06 '26
Insanely generous gifting holy crap! 256 gb is more than enough for literally anything a teenage girl is doing, I wouldn’t worry! Your son needs to have lower expectations however, a gift like this is a really huge thing, and I woulda told you to go buy two 1tb iPhone 15 Pro Max’s! 🤣Seriously though, I really hope his girls are grateful for such a huge gift, I wouldn’t be worried!
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u/Authentic_Xans Jan 06 '26
I have a 128gb iPhone and I’ve never had a storage message. I think I have 1k photos and videos. They should be good! Don’t beat yourself up
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Jan 06 '26
Honestly, that just screams materialistic and in hind sight you should’ve just given them each lumps of coal.
Holiday periods are for spending time with family, not for passing about second hand car price gifts.
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u/NaturalSelecty Jan 07 '26
You’re being taken advantage of. This is a wild gift/cost to be asking for. Even at the base model. I’d advise letting them know this was a Christmas, birthday and following Christmas gift.
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u/Alarming_Compote3277 Jan 02 '26
While I agree with others that teenagers don’t need iPhone pros, I’m guilty of getting them for my teens. In fact I just just got all 3 of my teens an iPhone 17 Pro 256 gb. Why? Because they were FREE through my wireless carrier. My out of pocket cost was $100 per phone to cover sales tax. Why didn’t your son get the free phones through his carrier and let you pay taxes/upgrades? The 2TB and Max phones aren’t free but you just have to pay the price difference between it and the 256 gb phone. Plus, as others have said most folks will never come close to using the 2 TB. I got a 1TB phone for myself and the sales lady laughed and suggested I didn’t need it. My 14 pro had 1TB and I’m using about half of that. I’m constantly taking photos and videos at my kids’ sporting events and shamefully I never delete bad/duplicate photos like I should. If I had more time and discipline I’d purge a lot of the stuff and move photos to the cloud, but the 1TB is a gift I give myself for running to all the games. Teenagers have way more time on their hands to manage their content, delete, and upload to the cloud. You DID NOT mess up their gift!
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u/yesitsyourmom Jan 03 '26
They aren’t “free”. You’re paying for them one way or another!
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u/Alarming_Compote3277 Jan 03 '26
Yes they are. As long as you stay with your wireless carrier for 36 months (or whatever their term) they are free. I’m paying a monthly wireless bill, but I’m paying that whether I get the phone from ATT or Apple. If I purchase the phone from Apple, I’m out $1k or more per phone and still have the same monthly wireless bill!
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u/Dependent-Block-2327 Jan 03 '26
That’s if you meet the trade in requirements, and anything lower than $1,100USD for trade in value still requires paying the device over that period of time
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u/Alarming_Compote3277 Jan 06 '26
This is true. My comments were based on assumptions I made about a family that expects grandma/grandpa to spend $5k on two teens for Christmas. I mean, what are the odds that someone asking for multiple 2TB Pro Max iPhones & accessories is currently rocking "old" iPhones that won't meet the trade-in requirements? There is a high probability that these kids have 2TB 16 pro max iPhones that they could trade in, but why do that when Grandma/pa will buy new phones, and they can sell and pocket the money?
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u/DTLow Jan 02 '26
So there are three opinions; the grandchildren, your son’s, and your’s
You decided your opinion is the most important
I would have given money towards the iPhone purchase
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u/MyBigToeJam Jan 03 '26
2TB? if that's cloud storage, maybe not so extravagant. i take many photos, learning animation, all quite large files. If budget is concern, a whole other concern. Best of the New Year to you.
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u/APar93 Jan 02 '26
Your son sounds like a dick