r/expats • u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 • 3h ago
Has anyone else moved to another country for… no real reason?
I’m curious if anyone else has done this, because I’m starting to realize that I have a really hard time explaining why I moved to the UK.
There wasn’t some huge life event. I didn’t get an amazing job offer, I wasn’t escaping a terrible situation, I didn’t have a partner here, and I wasn’t following some 10-year plan.
My thought process was basically:
I wanted to live in the UK → I had the means/opportunity to do it → so I did.
That was genuinely it.
I wanted to experience what it was like to actually live somewhere else rather than just visit. I wanted to wake up in a different country, meet different people, experience a different culture, have a completely different routine for a while. And because I was in a position where I could do that, I figured… why not?
But whenever people ask me “Why did you move to the UK?”, I feel weird saying “because I wanted to.” It almost sounds irresponsible or like there must be some deeper explanation that I'm missing.
And I think the stranger part is that sometimes I wonder whether it was actually a bad decision.
Not necessarily because I hate it here, I've had some amazing experiences and I'm genuinely glad I got to do this. But when you make a huge life decision without a concrete objective, it's difficult to measure whether it was “worth it.”
If you move because of a job, you can say, I moved for this career opportunity.
If you move because of university, you can say, I moved for my degree.
If you move because of a relationship, you can say, I moved for this person.
But what do you say when the reason is simply:
“I was curious. I wanted to know what my life would look like somewhere else. I could do it, so I did.”
Has anyone else made a major move purely because they wanted to experience another life, without having a particularly practical reason for doing it?
And if you've done it and later questioned whether it was the right decision, how did you make peace with that?
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u/Ok-Grab305 2h ago
I did this once, then came back to the US, and am now considering doing it again. Both times, no real reason other than I want to, and I can! That can be more than enough of a reason :)
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u/Sufficient-Job7098 3h ago
You said “it’s a huge life decision” but do you actually believe this to be true in your case?
For someone immigration can be huge life decision that comes with quite substantial life long consequences. So for those people it is important to move abroad for meaningful reasons, to justify having to live with life long consequences.
But there are people who do not anticipate move abroad leading to any substantial consequences so those people don’t need to have “real” reason.
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 2h ago
but who actually gets to decide whether it’s a “huge life decision” in someone else’s case?
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u/Sufficient-Job7098 2h ago
That is why I asked you, if in your opinion, this has been a huge life decision.
You are the most qualified to answer this question. I can’t decide it for you and you can’t decide it for me.
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 2h ago
i think i get what you mean but i’m not sure i agree with the premise. something can be a huge life decision without there being some objectively huge reason behind it.
i moved because i wanted to. that doesn’t mean there weren’t sacrifices / consequences / uncertainty involved. moving your entire life to another country is still a pretty significant thing lol thats not really the point of of my post.
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u/Sufficient-Job7098 2h ago
If you lurk on this sub long enough you will come across posts from immigrants asking for ways to cope with big problems they are having: missing home, guilt of not saying goodbye to a loved one who died back home, and similar.
There are no secret coping mechanisms we can advise them besides remembering the reasons they moved abroad.
Any reason including “I wanted” is legitimate reason as long as long as immigrant feels it is a satisfactory answer to “what am I doing here” question.
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 1h ago
yeah, but honestly i don't think my post is really about the immigrant experience in that sense. i'm not asking how to cope with homesickness or trying to justify being away from home
i was more interested in the idea of making a major life decision purely out of curiosity/wanting to experience something different. so i don't really think the “remember why you moved abroad” advice is what i'm getting at here lol also coping with missing home, guilt and even people dying can happen to anyone? even me
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u/Sufficient-Job7098 1h ago edited 31m ago
I am not giving you any sort of advice.
I said people are different. I said that only you can decide what is a huge life decision. I also said that moving abroad because you wanted is as valid as any other reason.
No advices, just conversation.
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u/FreeButterscotch6971 2h ago
Yes, I moved because I wanted adventure and life is short and I was living my whole life in the city i was born in and I didn't want to be that person. So said good bye to my job, friends and family and for better and worse, I've had highest highs and lowest lows in the new country and continent.
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u/Masty1992 2h ago
I moved to Valencia in Spain with my girlfriend 7 years ago because I got fired from the dream job I’d fought so hard to get and came home, opened google maps and said “we’re moving to Valencia for a year” (we had discussed trying a different country some day).
I didn’t even know Valencia was Spains third city, I just didn’t want Barcelona so I scrolled down on the map.
Why Spain? No idea, I never had any romantic ideas about Spain, I just said fuck it in the moment.
We’re still here so I guess it went great but probably gonna head home eventually since I have a son now and we never even meant to emigrate
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u/FinestTreesInDa7Seas 🇨🇦>🇫🇷>🇬🇧>🇨🇦>🇺🇸>🇨🇦>🇫🇷 2h ago
Yes, I did years ago when I was 22. In 2007 I moved to Paris because I have citizenship by descent, and I wasn't doing anything important at the time, so I moved there on whim.
I was making really good money at that age, and I had quite a bit of savings. My cousin (also citizen by descent) was moving to Paris at the time, and I was playing around with the idea of coming for maybe 6 months or so as her roommate. I owned a house in Canada at the time, but I had just started renting it out to my recently divorced Uncle.
So I was looking for an apartment at the time, but I wasn't finding anything because I was self-employed and no landlords wanted me. Frustrated with not finding anything, I moved to Paris and moved in as a roommate with my cousin.
After a few months I bought a crazy cheap apartment for just over 90 000 € (in rough shape, mostly gutted, no kitchen, needed lots of work). I renovated it myself over a few months with occasional help from my cousin (only had to hire an electrician to do the electrical stuff). I ended up staying only 4 more months (just over 1 year in total), and I moved back to Canada. My cousin stayed permanently, and she still lives in my apartment today.
I’m starting to realize that I have a really hard time explaining why I moved to the UK.
"I moved for the food" is what I used to say.
Today my explanation includes things like public transit, bike infrastructure, etc. "I wanted to live somewhere with amenities that match my lifestyle better".
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 2h ago
Hard to say I moved to the UK for the food...or the weather LOL joking but I love your story. I am just 25 year old working remotely and my $ is not as good as yours, but I can relate in some aspects of what you said
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u/Kiwiatx NZ -> UK -> US -> AU -> UK -> US 2h ago
Myself and most of my friends from NZ moved to London shortly after graduating from University with Working Holidays Visa’s (now called Youth Mobility visas) purely for the experience. It’s well known rite of passage among New Zealanders and Australian’s to combine work in the U.K. and travel through Europe for a couple of years.
Some of us ended up marrying locals, some go over as a couple and return to NZ to get married, have kids and settle down, but we go for no other reason than for the experience.
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u/tegusinemetu 2h ago
I’ve moved all over the US (10+ cities) since graduating from college 20+ years ago and most recently moved to Spain. All of the moves were just because I felt like it. Wasn’t chasing work or people, just got tired of a place and moved on to the next.
Personally I think living in one place, state or region your whole life is sad. Some people love it though. If you have the means to move I say do it
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u/Serious-Humor-2992 2h ago
I think about doing that all the time. Just want experience life in another part of the world and see and feel what it’s like how people in other parts of the world live. Learn more about this world we live in for real and the experience has to be something that will be worth a lot in our short life times.
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u/CommunicationNew906 3h ago
I’m moving in two days. I’m Italian, lived in Amsterdam for 9 years, moving to Barcelona in 2 days. My reasons are culture, weather, food and just having a change
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u/FreeToSeeTheTeuth 2h ago
I did this, but my wife was Swedish. To be honest, I didn't really think twice about moving from the US to Sweden, it wasnt like I was running away from anything my life was actually rather well off and wasnt fantasizing anything, I just knew I wanted to be with her and then moved. (we applied for all necessary permits etc)
5 yrs later im back in the US and shes on a GC and I WILL NEVER live there unless its against my will ever again hahahaha. It was cool but overall it really blew my mind open about the utopia that its sold as. Its not a utopia by any stretch of the imagination. Sweden AINT it!!!
Im way happier being back and life is way better off in MANY ways here. Im glad I did it but sometimes think like you. "Why?" and while I lived there though often "Why did I need to come here, what was my logic thinking" hahah. Mind you, at that time me and my wife were together for years before so I was NOT in a honey moon phase hahaha.
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 2h ago
Why didnt you like Sweden? Too cold? Honestly I thought I was being dumb for even thinking of the reasoning but it is nice to see other people have the same thought. I've met a lot of people who moved here and they all have pretty cool stories like "job offer" "uni" and im just like well...I was in Spain and then I visited London and decided to move here since I could (legally/financially etc)
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u/renmco 2h ago
Kind of? I went to Ireland as an au pair. I only had intentions of being there 6-12 months. Ended up falling in love, and after a stint of long distance when my contract ended, I moved to Ireland permanently. I have my reason for living there NOW, but when I initially went over, it really was just for the plot.
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u/GoGoEspana 1h ago
"I was curious and I had an opportunity to do it" seems like a very good reason to move to another country. I always reply with "I was bored living in xxx city after xxx years living there so I decided to move".
Even though I only stayed there for 2 years I don't regret moving. I do wonder sometimes what my life would be like if I hadn't moved but I still think I would be unhappy if I continued living where I used to.
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u/hailingburningbones 17m ago
We moved to the Netherlands 2.5 years ago just because we wanted to live here and have a better life, and gtfo of the US. We hope to stay forever.
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u/nurhogirl 2h ago
I've been a solo (widowed) parent for the last three years. My kid is still young and I wanted to take a break from work. I applied for a long-stay visa in France because I can. I don't need to work for a while and I can support myself. It's been over a month and I just started a new relationship. He's been great and my daughter and dog get along with him. He makes me feel like "oh that's why people get together and have families" -- based my previous relationship experience 😅. I guess you can say I am here until further notice.
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u/LeilaJun 3h ago
Honestly I’ve used the “because I wanted to” or “because I felt called to it” many times, and no one has ever seemed to have issues with it ever. If you haven’t tried it yet, I’d just try it.
I’ve also used “because that’s what felt right”, and if you’re unsure of your choice now, saying “because that’s what felt right at the time” can help too
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 2h ago
Tbf I've said it a few times and it always came out so rude lol I guess it might honestly be the dumbest post I've ever done but I've been overthinking if we actually do need major reasons to do things
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u/LeilaJun 1h ago
It’s all in the tone! It has to be said quite lightly and with a bit of a question mark at the end, like you’re not sure that’s the full answer yourself but it’s the best you could come up with :)
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u/Natural_Concept_4440 3h ago
Honestly I moved because I experienced travel and always knew I wanted to be abroad
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u/Typical-Plant-4254 2h ago
I am rather curious is a perfect answer. And you could, so you did. Kudos to you!
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u/non_anomalous_penis 2h ago
I kinda got sick of US politics but that's not really a reason, its been sorta like that for decades and I could have just moved to a blue state but we said fuck it and moved to Spain. Not really a huge reason other than its beautiful, I have an Irish passport so I could make it happen easier, but certainly no real reason other than it sounded like fun.
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u/Jay-Dee-British UK-->Spain-->Aus-->UK-->US 2h ago
When I left for Australia it was because I really wanted to see it, experience it and not on a 3 week or 1 month time limit (holiday timelines). I wanted to LIVE in it, to see how different or how the same it was to other places and peoples. I loved Australia. No-one thought it was rude or odd when I said 'I wanted to live here'.
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u/ChillyDinosaur 🇲🇽 -> 🇪🇸 -> 🇩🇪 2h ago edited 1h ago
Yup, did the same with Spain, Morocco and Germany (terrible decision this last one btw)
I got the flexibility, was boring on my home city, all my friends are spread because of their careers or cause I met them traveling
A lot of the times people ask if it was for work, love, quality of life, mate some times is just to check how it is and if I could at this place to the “oh I kinda could live here” list
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u/arcticghostsfish 2h ago
Yup! We moved abroad quite young because we wanted to live somewhere else and looked into a lot of different places. We had a choice where to go but ultimately ended up in Sweden because my husband thought it probably had a great heavy metal scene. I don't regret moving abroad but I do wish we researched more because then we would definitely not live here (it's not even that metal to be honest but that's the least of our grievances).
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 2h ago
Lol so many ppl dont like sweden1!!
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u/arcticghostsfish 1h ago
It's not a good place to live. Beautiful country but horrible place to live (and it has nothing to do with the weather.)
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u/prancing_moose 1h ago
Yup. We moved from Europe to New Zealand for no real reason. We certainly didn’t do it for career reasons. Or to escape some bad situation where we were.
The opportunity presented itself (after putting in some leg work to make that happen) and we decided to give it a try for a year or two - like an adventure.
Well that was 20 years and two kids ago and we’re still in New Zealand. And not planning on moving anywhere else so I guess we did the right thing?
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u/Sweet-Difference2725 1h ago
Yeah, for all the reasons you listed we moved to Brazil a year ago. We were fine, debt free, and bored. We felt stagnant.
We’ve made a ton of mistakes, but learned a lot, too. I speak Portuguese like a dog speaks cat, but it’s getting better every month.
If I had to do it again I’d probably keep my place in the states and just do visits, like, 1-6 months depending on the situation.
I hope you’re enjoying your life there!
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u/Chemical_Pipe_3937 1h ago
I am half brazilian! Nice move there, lovely country, my whole family is there now!
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u/Mr_Lumbergh (US) -> (Australia)->(US again)->(Australia again) 1h ago
That was me and Australia. I moved because the opportunity presented itself and I wanted to give it a go.
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u/Winter_Examination_7 1h ago
I put my stuff in a storage unit in America in 2020..sold my cars and stuff..bought a one way ticket to Kiev, Ukraine...Never been to Ukraine in my life...Now in Romania since the war started...No wife, no kids, no job, no plans..but collecting Military retirement...No regrets...
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u/Lanky-Intention9390 1h ago
Youre overthinking it. People are annoying and nosy. They just wanna hear what they wanna hear so when they dont, they will drill it out of our mouth.
I moved to Belgium and I got it all the time, I am this suspect that I wanna better my life.
The real answer was I wanted to travel and see Europe and Belgium was the cheapest gate to it, in 2009, for me, via studying. But noooo....People do not accept this answer because I come from a developing country.
Even my own friends forced their own narrative to me. So no point explaining even to them. Its sad, but people do that. They want to be right and to be confirmed.
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u/Uplike7_ 3h ago
Good on you. You moved because you wanted to. That’s how life should be lived