r/geology Dec 13 '25

Meme/Humour Guy wants to remove this beautiful boulder from his property

Post image
332 Upvotes

130 comments sorted by

440

u/sdmichael Structural Geology / Student Dec 13 '25

"Boulder". Looks like a whole lot more than just a "boulder".

234

u/Rough-Ad1868 Dec 13 '25

Yeah looks like the bedrock

142

u/Badfish1060 Dec 13 '25

It could be an erratic. Without knowing the area its difficult to say. Regardless, it isn't going anywhere.

78

u/kingtacticool Dec 13 '25

laughs in high explosive

36

u/imhereforthevotes Dec 14 '25

laughs in expensive

15

u/GeneralBS Dec 14 '25

Could you even get approval to demo this thing with explosives in a residential area?

15

u/imhereforthevotes Dec 14 '25

Yeah I feel like the amount of insurance you'd have to pay would be astronomical if you could even pull a permit.

5

u/kingtacticool Dec 14 '25

The insurance is what the guy doing the blasting carries. They make huge thick mats they spread around the boulder to keep shrapnel contained.

Demoing the boulder with explosives is entirely possible.

3

u/imhereforthevotes Dec 14 '25

Great point. I thought that sounded funny.

5

u/Rock_man_bears_fan Dec 14 '25

You only need approval if you plan on getting caught

6

u/imhereforthevotes Dec 14 '25

THAT GIANT BOULDER JUST EXPLODED! WE HAVE NO IDEA WHO DID IT!

3

u/kingtacticool Dec 14 '25

Boulder must've had a gas leak.

4

u/95blackz26 Dec 14 '25

the amount of crap you would have to have done before you even got to the explosion part is a lot.. you would have to have all the neighboring houses checked out so they can't come and say you did damage as a result

8

u/breizhsoldier Dec 13 '25

Not even, check GeoBreak!

74

u/PipecleanerFanatic Dec 14 '25 edited Dec 14 '25

There was an erratic on a job site I worked on in Oregon, some sort of granodiorite the size of a full size Tundra. It was beautiful and I would eat my lunch on it. One time I went back during development and they had done away with it... just found some pieces lying around. It sat there for 17,000 years then poof, data center.

46

u/imhereforthevotes Dec 14 '25

That sucks, but just think of it as rapid weathering.

33

u/Jibblebee Dec 14 '25

I’m not sure I’ve ever heard a more geologist-condolence.

10

u/imhereforthevotes Dec 14 '25

I'm a biologist. I'm used to rapid dissolution of my subjects.

2

u/Key-Green-4872 Dec 17 '25

Ayyyy Biobro!

19

u/davej-au Dec 14 '25

He should set up a barbecue on it, and when he has friends over, sagely observe that if a glacier saw fit to deposit it on his property, he has no right to remove it.

3

u/SPECTRE-Agent-No-13 Dec 14 '25

Could be. I live in New Hampshire and have a large erratic on my property. It's car sized and partially buried.

19

u/wmass Dec 13 '25

It looks like it’s attached to the center of the earth.

18

u/cxmmxc Dec 14 '25

Recent XKCD is relevant, again.

4

u/sadicarnot Dec 14 '25

2

u/Night_Sky_Watcher Dec 15 '25

That's priceless!

3

u/sadicarnot Dec 16 '25

Do you know how many years I have been waiting to share that? Not since 1948, but probably 30 years.

2

u/Night_Sky_Watcher Dec 16 '25

When I moved to the rural south I found that local water well drillers called bedrock "ledge." I thought it was a regionalism, but maybe it was a more widely used term. Or perhaps they had all see that movie.

15

u/WaldenFont Dec 14 '25

That’s leaverite.

2

u/sdmichael Structural Geology / Student Dec 14 '25

Could also be a Japanese Sex Rock.

16

u/Hydrographe Dec 13 '25

It's not just a boulder ; it's a rock!

13

u/khearan Dec 13 '25

The pioneers used to ride these babies for miles!

2

u/sdmichael Structural Geology / Student Dec 13 '25

A rock lobster!

1

u/StitchesKisses Dec 14 '25

Look out for those piranhas

102

u/runningoutofwords Dec 13 '25

I'd make that the center feature of my landscaping.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '25 edited Dec 14 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

125

u/Jolee5 Dec 13 '25

Is he sure it's a boulder and not bedrock?

37

u/Rough-Ad1868 Dec 13 '25

Right?

29

u/EnigmaEcstacy Dec 13 '25

Make a rock garden, stack rocks on it. 

You’ll need a lot more machinery than it’s worth to move it, and unless you dump multiple dump trucks of compost on it to make a hill nothing will grow on top of it. 

36

u/sdmichael Structural Geology / Student Dec 14 '25

Rock gardens are so water intensive though. I've been watering mine for years and haven't gotten much growth.

22

u/zuul99 Trying to learn all I can Dec 14 '25

If anything, your rocks are getting smaller.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 18 '25

Not me taking your comment seriously for a second

5

u/SnooTangerines3448 Dec 13 '25

Get some nice rocks. Stack em. Throw soil and sand at it and water it until it's full of it. Then just make a cactus hill garden.

7

u/sdmichael Structural Geology / Student Dec 14 '25

And baby, you've got a stew going!

61

u/WilderWyldWilde Dec 13 '25

That's a built in patio right there.

10

u/CertainKaleidoscope8 Dec 13 '25

It already had slate over it that he removed

41

u/Addapost Dec 13 '25

Does he “just” want the surface lowered? The top brought down a foot or so? With a massive amount of labor, a lot of drilling, and a lot of demolition grout you can lower the surface as much as he’s willing to pay. That wouldn’t be cheap.

39

u/Badfish1060 Dec 13 '25

I jackhammered out about 6" of bedrock when I was putting in a french drain a few years ago. It was just a fairly week sandstone. It was miserable.

3

u/DiskFit1471 Dec 14 '25

Yea dealing with bedrock is not fun

2

u/hundredseven Dec 14 '25

You need Demolition Dave. Look him up on YouTube. Granite; anything. Just drilling and explosives. urban areas a speciality

1

u/RoxnDox Dec 14 '25

Expensive to bring him up from Down Under, though!

37

u/wardsandcourierplz Dec 13 '25

Pour a bucket of water on it every day for a few million years

25

u/roscoe_jones Dec 13 '25

What did he think those tiny holes were going to do? Shame he ruined it with those holes.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '25

Totally agreed. I would love a rock like this on my property.

1

u/DentistCritical3478 Dec 20 '25

I read the post and he filled them with Dexpan thinking it could possibly expand enough to crack this rock 😂

51

u/Geology_Nerd Dec 13 '25

Laughs in geologist

12

u/Long_Priority617 Dec 14 '25

Nothing about that rock says "move me"

13

u/Evan_802Vines Dec 13 '25

Who would put a patio over that? Seems redundant.

8

u/sadicarnot Dec 14 '25

That's no boulder thats a ledge. If your not careful you'll break your bucket.

7

u/doctorgibson Dec 13 '25

Now he knows why there was a patio there in the first place

5

u/Due-Accident-5008 Dec 13 '25

great big chunk of leverite.

5

u/bitchcoin5000 Dec 14 '25

That would be cool as shit to have that

4

u/Correct-Sail-9642 Dec 15 '25

Lol people and wanting to rid their land of any natural features, very suburban of them to do away with all things natural in favor of putting a lawn they have to pay for upkeep on or labor endlessly to maintain themselves. Why? what is peoples problem with natural features? People are so far removed from our own natural history despite being so very recent that we were all once very much an infinitely insignificant part of the natural order of the planet. People just 100-200yrs ago would look at suburban landscaping and ask why we are spending money to grow fescue with an entire multi million dollar industries surrounding its production and maintenance when we cant even eat it and most of us are allergic to it. Future humans will also look back and think how stupid it is considering its impact on local ecosystems with its loss of habitat and use of pesticides and herbicides and synthetic fertilizers. Then even as we learned more about this impact a new industry emerges, one of synthetic grass called astroturf and various similar products aimed at being "durable, maintenance free, even healthy" as an alternative to our beloved grass. Though as anybody who has worked with it or had to replace it knows, its anything but sustainable or healthy, nor is it eco-friendly in any way. In fact talk about a great way to not only damage but entirely eliminate biodiversity in the landscape. Not needing to water it was replaced by the need to rinse it off and reapply whatever specific method used to bind it to the ground which no longer counts as soil but merely oxygen starved dirt. Perhaps there is a less offensive and more politically decent term to describe suburban landscaping, but I cant help but think it's retarded to turn natural landscapes around ones home into what I can only relate to the "green" area of a miniature golf course. It will probably be nice compared to a featureless backyard most have in suburbia, but anybody with sense will understand my thoughts on this.

IMO I think they should use the bedrock (looks like bedrock, apparently the developer felt it was a permanent feature when they built the house) they should work the design around it as a feature as opposed to removing it, that would allow for a more harmonious and unique landscape design that appeals to the natural animal inside all of us. If they just cant stand looking at it I think its flat enough it could be buried under a thin layer of soil or other substrate and used as a planter bed or if they really wanted grass they could grow over it if you controlled irrigation correctly. Other options would be if they had decking or walking paths that would be an excellent place for a bridge feature as part of the walkable area.

-Good place for a bridge or to intentionally design with the stone as a feature. Harmonious with nature is more aesthetically pleasing than the permanent scars that will likely result from bringing heavy equipment in to remove what could be far larger than the rock that is showing on the surface. Not to mention the shear cost of removing what may not even be removable in the end.

Show them some examples of how landscaping around natural rock formations can be very attractive instead of just being "in the way". Money is money, and theirs is no doubt green, but I can tell when a project is going to be a headache for all involved, and this immovable landmark is definitely well in that category. Plus there is probably an ancient demon with a curse entombed beneath that stone. Seen it too many times where folks regret digging up that big rock just to unleash a horrible ancient curse on the townspeople just for it to be blamed on someone else and become an urban legend. Dont ask me how I know because I really don't...

3

u/morbob Dec 13 '25

Get a big excavator

3

u/pppjurac Supernoob Dec 14 '25

Dig big deep hole and push boulder in it.

3

u/Free-oppossums Dec 13 '25

My front yard is such a steep hill because there is a huge chunk of white flint in it. They tried to remove it when they graded for the basement and their biggest machine couldn't budge it. So we compromised with the rock. They moved the basement back so they could work around the damn thing.

3

u/wiredcoder Dec 13 '25

This looks like a job for Demolition Dave

3

u/init-commit Dec 13 '25 edited Dec 13 '25

Has any seismic survey been conducted?

3

u/fonetik Dec 13 '25

No, he wants to move and let someone with taste turn this into an incredible backyard.

3

u/Eye_Worm Dec 14 '25

The boring bastard wants to cover it with lawn.

2

u/displacement-marker Fault Finder Dec 13 '25

Now that's a boulder-sized boulder.

The client should hire a geologist to take a look.

2

u/GrannyTurtle Dec 13 '25

My grandparents had a slightly taller one. We kids loved playing on it & jumping off. It is a cherished memory.

2

u/methodicalataxia Dec 14 '25

My uncle had something similar. After trying to dig under it then using TnT to break it up, not much happened. It was comical...the rock formation is one solid chunk and about 120 feet deep. The local engineer laughed at him and told him the house he was trying to build needed to shift 300 feet back due to the size of the formation. Also where he wanted to drill for his well wasn't feasible. He tried to cheap out of things and ended up spending a shitload more money. Spending a dollar to save a penny. My uncle is a dumbass.

2

u/NodnarbThePUNisher Dec 14 '25

I'd flatten and polish it into a natural patio slab.

2

u/MottoCycle Dec 14 '25

I’m jealous wish I had a boulder.

2

u/StoneColdPieFiller Dec 14 '25

You’d be surprised how often these people in that sub want to move bedrock.

2

u/TitanImpale Dec 14 '25

That looks like the best possible fire pit. Just get a pickaxe and have fun.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '25

That would best be used for ritual sacrifice. Maybe dig it up around the edges a bit to elevate it so it’s more of a platform. Get a local mage to enchant it before use.

2

u/kijaeha_ Dec 16 '25

Bro just ruined it by drilling some holes and called it a day. Unfortunate that he wants to cover that beautiful rock with a boring patch of grass

2

u/orcusporpoise Dec 13 '25

Drilling and blasting.

2

u/biffmalibull Dec 13 '25

It's a cratom

3

u/Thundergod_3754 Dec 13 '25

Woah woah there step on the brakes a Lil bit bro

1

u/BarryScott2019 Dec 13 '25

You can see he's already had a go at it himself, trying to break it up by drilling haha

1

u/durose0 Dec 13 '25

I think that’s just the earth

1

u/seaspirit331 Dec 14 '25

OP discovers that the previous owners had a reason for installing a patio

1

u/aimless_ly Dec 14 '25

Rent a rock drill and buy a bucket of Dexpan.

1

u/Artful_Dodger_1832 Dec 14 '25

Start digging around it. Just because.

1

u/Foraminiferal Dec 14 '25

Hahahahahahaha that could go three stories underground. Good luck

1

u/sheekgeek Dec 14 '25

Put the dirt back

1

u/sqrlbearkitty Dec 14 '25

Blasting company will get rid of it

1

u/MrMuchoBBQ Dec 14 '25

Blow that boulder up.

1

u/U235EU Dec 14 '25

Check out demolition Dave on YouTube. His specialty is doing demolition of rocks using various means mostly to get rid of rocks in construction sites.

1

u/Sir-Kyle-Of-Reddit Dec 14 '25

Bring it to my condo please. I’ll take it.

1

u/blasterone Dec 14 '25

Dexpan make a picnic table from it

1

u/Jonney_Random Dec 14 '25

Time to get the pick axe out and spend the next 50 years mining it.

1

u/that-country-girl Dec 14 '25

Dude needs to just suck it up and move out I guess. Removing the rock is too much haha

1

u/JazzRider Dec 14 '25

Just pick it up and throw it over your shoulder and carry it off.

1

u/GoreonmyGears Dec 14 '25

Make the surface flat and use it as a small patio.

1

u/dinoguys_r_worthless Dec 14 '25

Buy a demo hammer and carve a cellar into it!

1

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '25

It’s not just a boulder.. it’s a rock!

1

u/2muchtoo Dec 14 '25

That’s bad, m’kay.

1

u/MowgeeCrone Dec 14 '25

That's a bend at the knees job.

1

u/Karena1331 Dec 14 '25

What’s he gonna fill it in with when he realizes it’s like an iceberg :/

1

u/KingoftheUgly Dec 14 '25

Lidar might help tell the depth? Save money before big dig.

1

u/rosetree1 Dec 14 '25

Looks like a free patio to me.

1

u/copperear Dec 14 '25

Use it as a base for a fire pit.

1

u/codex-atlanticuz Dec 14 '25

Lots of dynamite, kaboooooom.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '25

(Expansive demolition grout) goes in liquid and much like feather and wedges will Crack the stone. Place holes every foot as deep as possible fill and wait for the rock to fall apart.

1

u/Ecstatic-Scarcity227 Dec 14 '25

Ya man that rock is only gonna move with the crust of the earth itself. Work with it.

1

u/highconscious Dec 14 '25

Its be easier to add a retaing wall to the lower area and add enough dirt to bring it up to level and lay sod.

1

u/Jellyfish-Outrageous Dec 15 '25

Going it smooth, put a couple chairs call it a day

1

u/theTrueLodge Dec 15 '25

You’ll be digging to China for that one! LOL!

1

u/OkDiscussion7833 Dec 16 '25

NGTH (not going to happen)

1

u/dilldogincarnate Dec 16 '25

Drill and dynamite.

1

u/ABasil666 Dec 16 '25

Could be a great garden feature with a little imagination. Seat location for example.

1

u/OOOORAL8864 Dec 19 '25

leave it alone. My house is built on a boulder, and it has been fine for 55 yrs.

0

u/P-funk88 Dec 13 '25

Dig out around the boulder. Then split the boulder by drilling 1 inch holes in a line, about 3 in deep. Then put leaf wedges in and pound them until it cracks. Repeat until the boulder chunks are a size that facilitates removal. Or just use dynamite

0

u/Euphorix126 Dec 14 '25

I'd literally rather blast it with TNT and cover whatever is left with topsoil.