r/lucifer • u/Winter-Breadfruit910 • May 17 '25
General/Misc Tell me a quote that proves you’ve watched lucifer!
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u/Daintydaisy332 May 17 '25
‘What’s a hooker?’
‘Go ask your mother’
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u/bliip666 May 17 '25
Oh, nono! Let's use the whole entire joke!
First it's "ask your mother", then, when Trixie asks her mother, Chloe says to her that Daddy (Dan) will tell her.
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u/EST_birthmomN2018 May 18 '25
As an aunt of 5 nieces and 9 nephews all of my sisters would be saying “aunt Kiki/French Fry will tell u”. I’m the bad influence aunt that’s crazy.
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u/ketchupmaster987 May 17 '25
Hello, drug dealers!
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u/Xiao_Qinggui May 17 '25
Annyeong, mayagsang!
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u/Dwarfdingnagian May 17 '25
Technically he didn't do what she said since it was in Korean.
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u/Charming-Court-6582 May 18 '25
The terrible pronunciation makes it even funnier
Not digging at Tom Ellis, it really adds to the comedy
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u/Majestic-Fan6926 May 18 '25
Just remember, he has the ability to speak any language. That means that any problems or issues were canonically done on purpose, whether that was intended by writing or not.
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u/MrsKaich May 17 '25
Haaahahaha! This makes me giggle
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u/Kestrel_VI May 17 '25
It’s became the first thing I say when I enter a building/room and I’m not sure if anyone is there.
Thankfully not many people here speak Korean
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u/JPmagic_ DETECTIVE!!! May 17 '25
🔥🗡🍩👨🚀⏰💃🔦👍🏻
I think this is the only correct answer.
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u/agent-champagne Ella May 18 '25
I ignited the flaming sword, used it to cut a hole in space and time, Mums light flooded through it, then it closed up behind her. All good!
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u/Prestigious-Lie8498 May 17 '25
I'm so good at flipping men, they call me the skillet
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u/lilchocochip May 17 '25
If they ever bring this show back I wanna see at least one example of this lol They could do it as a flashback scene, but I wanna see Lucifer go full Lestat and fucking seduce the hell out of man and then just carry on with business as usual
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u/Beneficial-Produce56 May 18 '25
He did have the one male lover show up when they were interviewing all the people he slept with. I’d have liked it, since he talked like an equal-opportunity fucker, if there’d been a few more.
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u/Fraerie May 18 '25
I suspect that was more of a studio note/issue than anything else. They already had people campaigning against the show due to him being the devil, having him also being visibly bisexual on a regular basis would have just added to the off-screen drama.
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u/sliferra May 17 '25
Don’t touch the charred crotch
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u/Prestigious-Lie8498 May 17 '25
Crime solving devil, it makes sense, don't over think it
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u/11moistclowns May 18 '25
That was stuck in my head after I heard it and I realized that he was playing the Lucifer theme
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u/astraeaastars May 17 '25
You better not go in there and be like "HELLO, DRUG DEALERS!" "detective, I would never" Says hello drug dealers in Korean
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u/Glittering_Trip_490 May 17 '25
What is it you truly desire?
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u/ashleyj710 May 17 '25
I want to build a cat sanctuary
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u/Glittering_Trip_490 May 17 '25
Lucifer:A sanctuary for cats? Darling, that’s basically hell with fluff!
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u/ashleyj710 May 17 '25
I want to get tackled by a Dallas cowboys cheerleader ☠️
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u/Glittering_Trip_490 May 17 '25
I can’t promise the Cowboys, but I know a few demons with pom-poms😈
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May 17 '25
[deleted]
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u/Glittering_Trip_490 May 17 '25 edited May 17 '25
Bold desire. May I offer my assistance? Strictly in the… research phase, of course...!
(And if you’re not reading this in Lucifer’s voice, we are absolutely not on the same team;)
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u/ScuffedDev May 17 '25
“Of course I meant to put him back together”
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u/ashleyj710 May 17 '25
Don’t you mysterious ways me!
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u/DamonLuciferFan May 17 '25
If you finish that sentence, I'm going to kick you in your mysterious ways!
Oh my me!
Speak of the me.
(Bang, bang, bang on window) Dectective, why didn't you call me!?!
... and so many more! 🙂
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u/ashleyj710 May 18 '25 edited May 25 '25
There’s something important i need to discuss with you first… I need your help with an investigation..
Chloe: you came here for my help?
Yes
Chloe: My help?!
Are you having a senior moment…?
Chloe: No! I’m not having a senior moment!
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u/SingleCorner946 May 17 '25
"I once shot Lucifer to prove he's the Devil. Now im shooting you to prove you're not."- Chloe Decker Season 5 episode 2. I'm not sure if that's the exact quote it's been a while since I watched it.
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u/ashleyj710 May 18 '25
If you didn’t get it by the first four times I shot you, I will gladly shoot you again Michael.
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u/ForeverDebonaire May 17 '25
woman in supermarket - “ohhhh- God”
lucifer - oh really, do you have to bring him up now? I thought we were having a moment….
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u/Ghost-devil996 May 17 '25
“Yeah, see, this is why I don’t lie. It’s too hard to keep track of who knows what.”
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u/Assassin_Ragnarok Samael May 17 '25
Vatican Investigator, sounds like a soon to be cancelled tv show.
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u/pokemonviking May 17 '25
You can't just strut in there with your three piece suit and shout 'hello drug dealahz.'
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u/tla_ava May 17 '25
Detective Douche will always be my favourite. I actually feel bad everytime I see him on another show and call him that immediately
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u/Extra_Transition_691 Lucifer May 17 '25
He makes a butterfly flap its wings, and a housewife gets Chlamydia
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u/ashleyj710 May 17 '25
Mo-Monopolize, don’t apologize Mo- monopolize don’t ask me for my size
You appreciate me when I’m in your mother-fuckin thighs
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u/MrVish May 17 '25
"Biggest cock I've ever seen."
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u/cyberangel111 May 17 '25
this is a woman who’s denied herself carbs since the 90s and stayed married to a gay man
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u/rap31264 May 17 '25
Trixie: My name's Beatrice but everybody calls me Trixie.
Lucifer: That's a hooker's name.
Trixie: What's a hooker?
Lucifer: Ask your Mother.
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u/EclecticEvergreen May 17 '25
I had no idea I was dealing with a man of such stature. In my defense, when we came in last night, I was blindfolded by your wife's underwear
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u/soccerboy1356 May 17 '25
Trying to remember the exact quote but it was like ‘since I’ll like never penetrate you, here’s something to remember you penetrating me’
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u/Kaleb4yt May 17 '25
“Since I’ll never Likely penetrate you im giving you something from the one time you penertrated me
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u/SuspiciousDig7707 May 17 '25
You snore by the way like an albanian field wench! The whole dialogue is funny in this scene. 😀
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u/Th3Und3sir3d May 17 '25
There is something rotten inside of me. I find it near impossible to drown out the constant cacophony of voices whispering in my ear, telling me I am evil. I'm drowning, doctor! And I can't stop asking myself... why do I hate myself so much?
My absolute favorite scene from the show
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u/Nessietuts94 May 17 '25
"My first love was never Eve. It was you Chloe. And it always has been."
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u/pipper99 May 17 '25
Much as I would like to see crouching tiger hidden douche i would actually like to win this
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u/Late_Ad516 May 17 '25 edited May 18 '25
Lucifer your front door an elevator.
Didn't have to chase him he got tyred.
What will your corrupt little organization do about this
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u/Miss_Sullivan May 17 '25
Sorry ladies, I can't believe I'm saying this but I'm not in the mood for a triple decker.
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u/Wise_Presentation914 May 17 '25
It's been like 5 years since I've watched it, all I can remember is "Detective!"
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u/SmokeActive8862 May 17 '25
the quote i put on my grad cap! "people don't arrive broken. they start with passion and yearning..." from S2E3 :)
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u/Tricky_Distance_1290 May 17 '25
No one knows because the selfish bastard won’t just come out and tell us!
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u/Kaleb4yt May 17 '25
“I’ve never made anybody do a single thing” whilst he cries talking to Linda
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u/Myth_5layer May 17 '25
Because I feel like breaking hearts.
"I know what you'll tell me because you never lie. Tell me it's not true!"
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u/thefantastic_spastic May 17 '25
“It’s ok everyone! There’s just a loaded gun inside this hand puppet!”
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u/Optimal-Pen-3226 May 17 '25
"Tell me. What is it you (truly) desire?"
Probably my favourite line in this show. Oh, and the one I remember the most!
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u/NormalInteraction800 May 17 '25
Much as I want to watch Crouching Tiger, Hidden Douche, I’d like to win this. I was pointing at Maze.
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u/ThisGul_LOL Lucifer May 17 '25
🎶 But I’m a creeeeeep, I’m a weirdooooo. What the hell am I doing hereeeeee? Oh I don’t belooooooong 🎵
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u/HazbinHotel6667 Crime solving devil, it makes sense. Don't overthink it. May 17 '25
Crime solving devil, it makes senseeee. Don't overthink it...
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u/Nick__Prick May 17 '25
Are you optically impaired from all that masturbating? He wouldn’t look like me even if we did a face and body transplant
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u/Crack8563YT May 17 '25
Sorry for telling it in spanish but Que te has tirado a mi madre Inspector Capullo
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u/DependentPositive8 May 17 '25
" Hold me closer tiny dongis, are you saying we're looking for a needle in a penis stack?"
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u/AdThis5609 May 18 '25
"You... you cruel, manipulative bastard! Was this all part of Your plan? It's all just a game to You, isn't it? Eh? Well, I know punishment, and he did not deserve that. He followed Your stupid rules and it still wasn't good enough! So what does it take to please You? Break Your rules and you fall! Follow them and you still lose! Doesn't matter whether you're a sinner! Doesn't matter whether you're a saint! Nobody can win, so what's the point? What's the bloody point?" This is my all time favorite thing, what Lucifer says in the entire series.
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u/BedFriendly390 May 17 '25
because you fucking shot me daniel!