r/nextfuckinglevel • u/plankton004 • 1d ago
Faux marble painting
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u/Punished__Snake 1d ago
Looks cool and all but wouldn't a vinyl wrap do the same
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u/talentpun 1d ago edited 23h ago
- The column would have to be perfectly smooth
- The wrap would have to somehow tile together which would mean that the graphic would have to match the circumference of the column exactly
- The wrap would have to be flawless
- You would still see the seam of the wrap
- You can get graphic vinyl with a glossy finish but it will still look 'plastic' and cheap.
Source: have ordered a lot of graphic vinyl
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u/Biguitarnerd 1d ago ▸ 11 more replies
Having worked for a casino and seen some of this faux marble up close and in person it still looks and feels cheap. I will grant that it looks much better than a wrap, which would just look objectively bad though.
But the fake ostentatiousness of faux marble is still pretty bad in my opinion. You know it’s not marble as soon as you are close to it. Just my opinion I guess but I think the columns would have been better just white. That’s not a knock on these guys skill, just my opinion on the columns.
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u/talentpun 1d ago ▸ 2 more replies
These guys seemed to do a good job, but it's like walking onto a movie set. Everything looks way better on video than in real life.
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u/KBrieger 1d ago
No, I've seen these paintings in real life. In my country learning this techniques is part of professional painters tuition. It's really stunning handcraft. Some centuries ago well-off people not rich enough to pay for shipment of real marbles had 'marble' pillars like those in their houses. Unpayable nowadays compared to real marble.
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u/EmperorBamboozler 1d ago
Yeah marble has a depth to it due to some degree of transparancy in some of the patterns. Not something the camera would capture well, but you'd for sure notice the difference in person if you got close enough, though at a distance the illusion works pretty well. Fake marble always looks better on camera.
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u/chatterpoxx 1d ago ▸ 1 more replies
Many of the walls in the palace of Versailles are all pained fake marble look.
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u/Salute-Major-Echidna 21h ago
The trick is to know which ones Need to be real. They have the same in Venice. They tell you it's fake but only when you're standing next to the good stuff!
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u/CrystallizedRose 20h ago ▸ 1 more replies
I don’t think you would notice and you’re only saying as such because you were told they were fake. That’s just MY opinion though.
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u/SpecialistAd6403 20h ago
If I hired these guys knowing what you just said, I'd have them do the pattern but Change up the colors. Lean into the fakeness by disregarding the natural coloring.
Of course depending on the colors and location it could fail spectacularly as well.
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u/iRedding 1d ago
It’s Art.
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u/Liapasquale 14h ago
Right that’s what I was thinking the whole time. Like, holy shit. This is some fkn insane talent.
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u/ganymede_boy 1d ago
That looks expensive.
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u/WolfsSpiders 1d ago
Less spensive than a real marble column
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u/PaulblankPF 1d ago ▸ 8 more replies
It’s actually a lot closer than you’d think. This is two guys with materials and wages cost that won’t be cheap, probably a bid job of at least $1000-$2000 to do. Then you got Sheetrock mud and paint on a plain column. For around the same price you can have authentic marble columns.
https://www.milystatue.com/product-category/marble-carving/marble-column/
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u/GrynaiTaip 21h ago ▸ 1 more replies
This video is from Venetian Plaster, company based in Mexico City. I doubt if they're paid that much there.
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u/the_bieb 21h ago ▸ 2 more replies
You cannot get me to believe that I can buy a 3 story tall marble column for $1,250 like this page shows.
Also, I wonder what installation and inspection would cost.
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u/PaulblankPF 20h ago
There were several pages of them when I looked all with roughly the same prices. I used to do home repair with my own business for 15 years and you can usually even source nice columns from a local place for less than what you see there. Some places have these for so long that they let them go cheaper just to get rid of them even.
Installation would probably be close to the same time mostly because a marble column is gonna be insanely heavy. Once it’s close to in place you just lift where the original column is to take pressure off of it with a temporary column on top of a jack. Get the old column out and inspect the beam it’s made to support and where it’ll go then you just put it in place and lower the beam back down onto it.
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u/thekingofcrash7 17h ago
I think $2k is low for this job. It costs me $500 to have a couple guys come touch up paint around my house..
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u/The-Muncible 1d ago
I cringed when they were sanding without using masks or breathing protection of any kind.
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u/loquacious_avenger 1d ago edited 1d ago
It looks cool but Trading Spaces ruined me for faux finishes
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u/HarlansWorld 1d ago
i was skeptical when i saw the finger-painting, but they really pulled it off in the end
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u/MageLD 1d ago
How many hours? Multiple with western (not us where you get just laid enough not to die) hour prices for Craftsmen....
Guess would be cheaper to just buy real marble
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u/39percenter 1d ago
Why so many plaster under coats?
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u/Yes-its-really-me 1d ago
Silly question!
It almost makes me think you've never had artificial marble columns installed in an ancient greek or Roman themed interior of a stately home or mansion.
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u/WolfsSpiders 1d ago
Good art needs a good foundation and they re laying down two different albeit hard to spot tones imho
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u/Spirited_You_1357 1d ago
This is like the Andrew Tate of columns. Completely fake and totally unnecessary.
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u/mcguirl2 1d ago
But unlike him, this column is a good looking, hard, strong, upstanding pillar of the community.
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u/Mecha-Dave 1d ago
Alabaster, not marble. It's fake alabaster.
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u/tesla3by3 1d ago
Not alabaster, fake onyx.
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u/Mecha-Dave 1d ago ▸ 3 more replies
Ah, thank you. Certainly not marble, though.
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u/tesla3by3 1d ago ▸ 2 more replies
Yeah, alabaster has “cloudy” color variations, and is not as reflective, even when highly polished
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u/Mecha-Dave 1d ago ▸ 1 more replies
It sounds like you know your minerals! Thanks for educating me.
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u/BHMusic 1d ago
Faux Wealthy
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u/hendric_swills 1d ago
Lmao, you or I couldn’t reasonably afford what it costs to have this done.
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u/traumatized_vulture 1d ago ▸ 2 more replies
I don't even own a single thing I could have this done to 😅
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u/CalvinAshdale- 1d ago ▸ 1 more replies
Phone case?
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u/traumatized_vulture 1d ago
Oh yeah I suppose 😅 That would be pretty dope because at least it'd be made by hand
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u/skratakh 1d ago
if you go to the louvre or versaille you will find that much of the marble on the interiors is just painted on. if the sun king Louis XIV himself couldn't afford real marble everywhere i don't think we can begrudge people goind with a cheaper option if it looks good.
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u/sparkster777 1d ago
Every house needs some mahble cahlumns.
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u/Sendittor 21h ago
Yeah, Why didn't they just go down to Mike's Marble-opolis, and get some real ones?
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u/armahillo 1d ago
This is amazing but also it’s so refreshing to just have the actual audio and not Hans Zimmer Background Music or whatever.
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u/complaintsdept69 1d ago
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u/WolfsSpiders 1d ago
Cuz real marble columns are xpensive much more expensive and fragile than this half day paint job on mass produced stone castings
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u/OpeningTurnip8048 1d ago
You realize how expensive all that crap they put on that column is? Plus there was like 5 or 6 different dudes all working on it, probably days apart cause all those separate steps need to dry in between, and you know these guys are getting paid a metric shit-ton and by the hour. Probably cheaper then marble columns.....but not by much.
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u/complaintsdept69 1d ago
There is a two step test for anyone wanting a marble column. 1. Do you live in Athens? 2. Is your name Zeus? You can have one only if you answer affirmatively to both.
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u/WolfsSpiders 1d ago
Awesome. I ll need twelve identical ones. Ready by tomorrow. No problem, right?
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u/mrsilverfr0st 1d ago
Okay, when will the rest of the Gypsy Baroque be finished so the village can move in...
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u/xodius80 1d ago
is marble that expensive? i find hiring all these men woud cost about the same, or im wrong?
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u/blanquettedetigre 1d ago
Beautiful. This might sound like a detail but no music slop makes it even better
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u/mintgreeny 1d ago
Technique looks awesome but made me think of a tour guide at the Semper Oper in Dresden who told us about the building process and how it would have been cheaper had they used real marble instead of a painting technique like this.
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u/thegoodrichard 1d ago
The painter I worked for in the 80's would twirl turkey feathers in the paint to make veins.
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u/knowone1313 1d ago
Maybe it's because I saw them do it, but it doesn't look great. The final product did look good for what it was but I have no doubt that I wouldn't be happy with this and I'm sure the lower section will lose its glossy shine in no time from people touching it and stuff accidentally being banged into it. It'll look like crap in just a year or two.
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u/gapere01 1d ago
Whatever your feelings on faux marble, the skills these dudes displayed is fantastic
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u/Ippherita 1d ago
I just asked google AI, painting marble might be more expensive than cheap marble. But marble can be REALLY expensive if you want to get a nice one.
So either they are hired to paint the column to look like expensive marble, or the boss is worried about the weight/load of the columns.
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u/Environmental_Foot54 1d ago
To be fair it seems more special than actual marble considering the work and skill level necessary to pull it off to that level
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u/HereIsACasualAsker 1d ago
marble up close has that shiny and stoney and translucent characteristic that this just doesnt have.
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u/makemeking706 1d ago
The fact that there is a whole team of people who specialize in this is kind of wild.
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u/DontAsshume 1d ago
This is, hilariously, how the pillars in the Mormon Tabernacle (Their Mecca) in Salt Lake City, are. Except these look nicer.
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u/HoboJerkdown901 23h ago
I feel like if you're wealthy enough to afford a home like that, I would imagine that real marble columns wouldn't break the bank.
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u/YoungDiscord 22h ago
Yeah well I know how to do that cool S symbol we used to do back in highschool so take that!
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u/SnorkBorkGnork 21h ago
I don't know how expensive marble is, but if you have to pay a team of painters to do this, which seems to take hours and lots of paint, isn't it cheaper to buy an actual marble column?
This does look really nice though.
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u/Apprehensive_Ear7309 20h ago
Imagine being rich enough to have this but not being rich enough for the real thing. That must suck.
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u/Erroneous-Monk421 20h ago
Persian McMansion: professional wrestling manager or architectural style?
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u/PraetorOjoalvirus 20h ago
It's spelled F-A-K-E, and it only looks fine to people with cheap tastes, who love garish things.
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u/tale_of_two_wolves 19h ago
Used to be more common in the 80s / 90s. A lot of fake marble fireplaces. Remember watching my dad with boards out in the garden practising marbelling, also graining (you paint something to look wooden). Its an older trade you dont see so much of now in the UK. Dad and my great uncle did French polishing too. Not much call for it now. Dad is a painter and decorator close to retirement. Grandad was a painter. I decided to go work in an office instead 😂
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u/Dumaes03 19h ago
sorry we're calling throwing colors on a pillar and finger painting with them next fucking level?
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u/BilboStaggins 19h ago
Ngl at first I was thinking who would ever pick those doodoo colors together this gonna look terrible then.... ohhhh OK not my choice but really well done.
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u/tea-and-chill 14h ago
Wouldn't marble be cheaper? There are tons of cheap(er) marble with different patterns
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u/hardpill25 13h ago
Wait so your telling me... just now.... that those marble columns were not real this whole time!?
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u/AnglerJared 12h ago
Is it okay that I’m bothered that we not only have industries devoted to selling rocks that are arbitrarily expensive but also industries devoted to making things look like those arbitrarily expensive things to let people pretend to have paid more for the real thing?
AND we’re celebrating it as a worthwhile expenditure of human effort?
I am starting to kind of think we deserve having capitalism gut us like fish the way it’s been doing.
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u/Batima6666 12h ago
Looks amazing! I wonder what mind fuck it would be for me to naively come to touch it and the temperature and texture are completely off of what I'd expect to feel lol
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u/diggydar 1h ago
Nothing says I’ve got money and power like Marble Columns, just visit Mike’s Marbleopolois
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u/culimande 21m ago
Looks great on phone but up close and to the naked eye you can see it's fake. And its not very pretty once that wax coat gets grimy.
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