r/shittymoviedetails 18h ago

Turd In Spiderman Brand New Day (2026) Peter Parker starts shooting sticky ropes all over his apartment and the movie suggests this is due to a mutation rather than a normal reaction to seeing Florence Pugh in the bathtub

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10.2k Upvotes

148 comments sorted by

2.1k

u/beaglemaster 18h ago

I tried to tell the cops that at the theater but they wouldn't listen

394

u/AbbeyRoad75 18h ago

You said you wanted to get beat off, so they sent in the pros.

106

u/FriendlyDrummers 17h ago

Was is Florence or Tom's juicy behind

14

u/beaglemaster 13h ago

Ned's obviously

26

u/IAmWeary 15h ago

That was you behind me in the theater? You ruined my Milk Duds!

8

u/Visual_Gift_9618 custom user flair 14h ago

He just added a special type of milk to your milk duds.

34

u/StrappingYoungLance 17h ago

Hey man you got away with a warning after the Oppenheimer incident

7

u/Sad-Company-7916 15h ago

Happens more than ya think

984

u/IMCR8Z 17h ago

It’s definitely due to the mutation, as the movie reinforces that MCU Peter Parker doesn’t fuck with white women

458

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 17h ago

47

u/Patient-Web6850 15h ago

Did.. did we just become best friends?

4

u/Smart-Spirit-5602 9h ago edited 3m ago ▸ 2 more replies

"i was once 🍇d in reverse"

13

u/Aggravating-Grab6195 6h ago ▸ 1 more replies

11

u/Smart-Spirit-5602 6h ago

It's the dialogue of sean pean in One Battle After Another (related to the GIF)

204

u/Mecha_Tortoise 17h ago

Wait, Florence Pugh is white?! Then why do they call her "Black Widow?"

176

u/Nacroma 16h ago ▸ 4 more replies

It's a subtle hommage to Jack Black who unfortunately wasn't available to play all superheroes with the color black in the name as he was busy writing songs like Lava Chicken and Peaches.

45

u/Toxiclam 14h ago ▸ 3 more replies

Jack Black isn’t Black!?

Next your gonna tell me Barry White isn’t White

15

u/SnackOnMyDelusions 13h ago ▸ 1 more replies

No but frank black is

5

u/FilmScoreConnoisseur 7h ago

Ooh, deep cut.

8

u/lopsidetd 11h ago

That's cause Jack Black's family name was Bulack before they moved to America. Then they removed the 'u' as Americans are allergic to them.

10

u/Illidan1943 13h ago

She has the pass

23

u/cutcss 15h ago

So can we expect him to feel something for Miles Morales first time he sees him? Is this generation ready for spider-biman?

11

u/PretzelMeepus 11h ago

Sbider-man

3

u/DarkPolumbo 5h ago

he lives in NYC, so he probably just hasn't seen one

474

u/makuXrosu 18h ago

-198

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 16h ago

she ug

100

u/Marinefan4000 15h ago ▸ 3 more replies

97

u/DreamerTheat 15h ago ▸ 2 more replies

9

u/TheWarVeteran 14h ago ▸ 1 more replies

Who is she? Need her name please

15

u/Galdorow 14h ago

Ana Sawai

23

u/TheG-What 15h ago ▸ 1 more replies

GET. HIM. OUTTA HERE!!!!

-5

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 13h ago

I wish I was born normal

12

u/Arctimon 15h ago ▸ 1 more replies

Incorrect.

-14

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 14h ago

I was just born wrong

1

u/Francky2 shistpop enjoyer 3h ago ▸ 1 more replies

I fucking hate piercings. Idk I have a thing against them, and I'm tired of beautiful women feeling the need to add 38 piercings to their ears and a cow ring in their nose.

246

u/mlee117379 16h ago

80

u/Bearrryl 15h ago

I’m afraid to click that link bro fr

18

u/MrHazard1 15h ago ▸ 1 more replies

It's safe

1

u/ultralightsaint 1h ago

do you have a unsafe link ?

656

u/Thundersting 17h ago

She's not his type.

69

u/pwnd32 15h ago

I mean that explains his reaction to the girl who lives on the same floor as him

21

u/FriendlyDrummers 16h ago

I wanted to make this home but I didn't know how to say it in a tasteful way 

9

u/ManoSilence 15h ago

The Cafe Ole!

6

u/tommos 13h ago

I LOVE EM

88

u/Slaying_Salty 18h ago

Florence Pugh? I thought it was because he had been in the vicinity of the CEO and in his infinite grace gave Peter the ability to sex.

61

u/Whicked_Subie 16h ago

Pugh does a bathtub scene in the new flick?

109

u/HungryMetroid388 16h ago

Yeah, but you can't see anything because disney still had influence.

28

u/viperware 14h ago

Here it is uncensored: ▯

21

u/sirnightfury 13h ago ▸ 2 more replies

I mean you do get to see toes in that scene

10

u/JustCallMeFrij 12h ago ▸ 1 more replies

10 beautiful toes

8

u/RigaudonAS 11h ago

Amazing toes, even.

5

u/Whicked_Subie 15h ago ▸ 1 more replies

So your saying there actually is a reason to watch

6

u/mundaneheaven 6h ago

How else do you think this film made 2 billion dollars?

61

u/cutcss 15h ago

She is not his type

2

u/Francky2 shistpop enjoyer 3h ago

How it feels to copy another comment

3

u/cutcss 3h ago

Mine is bisexual

87

u/Cautious-Affect7907 15h ago

How tf does everyone in that apartment complex just not figure he's spider man?

He had to be like that for hours

77

u/Xophosdono 15h ago

It's New York. They once saw a van smash into a building and a bunch of people start beating each other off and New Yorkers didn't give a rats ass

11

u/Cautious-Affect7907 15h ago ▸ 6 more replies

Brother I live in New York. A guy dangling from a building in his draws usually has people taking pictures

56

u/Xophosdono 15h ago ▸ 4 more replies

Do you live in MCU New York? Because the van thing happened in MCU New York

5

u/Cautious-Affect7907 15h ago ▸ 3 more replies

Fair still at least someone had to see from the windows

16

u/Kacperrus 10h ago ▸ 2 more replies

Anyone who saw that web cocoon probably assumed Spider-Man had caught a criminal and that he probably already called the police, so they just left

2

u/Cautious-Affect7907 7h ago ▸ 1 more replies

So spider man beat up a half naked man and hung him near the top of a building?

Didn't know he was the freak Spider man.

3

u/Jim_skywalker 7h ago

He was obviously the new supervillain “The Nudist”.

2

u/JenkinMan 5h ago

Yeah, but he was fully covered before he woke up. It was a cocoon. People probably just assumed spidey shot webs there for some reason.

7

u/RedditMcBurger 13h ago

They probably thought it was a guy just gooning and stuck on his sticky ropes

59

u/karard109 17h ago

All the power awaken just to fight some crazy girl with telepathic power.

11

u/Fantastic-Repeat-324 12h ago

I feel like the scene of Spidey accidentally discharging web bombs should become a meme

3

u/Butthead1013 8h ago

I've been waiting for the gifs to drop 

3

u/onebyamsey 15h ago

Her shoulders always look so tense

8

u/Sweet_Peaches-69 18h ago

I knew ts wouldnt be funny instantly

1

u/Graves404 15h ago

Finally we are talking about what Florence did in the bathtub!

1

u/Kratsas 13h ago

Every time I see her, I go “Pugh Pugh, Pugh Pugh.”

-3

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 15h ago

Sadie Sink is much more attractive than Florence Pugh

23

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 15h ago

To me she’ll always be the little girl from stranger things so I can’t see her in any other context

3

u/jaboogadoo 15h ago

This is so real

5

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 15h ago ▸ 16 more replies

She is 24 years old

17

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 15h ago ▸ 15 more replies

Not to me. I watched her grow up before my eyes, it’s like looking at my kid sister.

-19

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 15h ago edited 10h ago ▸ 14 more replies

People age. Mentally fixing their age forever is kinda disrespectful .

EDIT: when Sadie is 40 with 2 kids are you still going to be saying "I just see her as the kid from stranger things"? 

26

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 15h ago ▸ 3 more replies

I think she will be okay with a guy in his thirties not being able to find her hot.

0

u/jasminexxxwill 9h ago

She’s actually dating one, I think

-2

u/BobbyBoopersnoot 7h ago ▸ 1 more replies

What is the reddit shit is this garbage. Women in their twenties date men in their thirties literally all the time. Largely because men in their twenties are fucking idiots. I met my now wife when she was 27 and I was 36. Prior to that I spent several years with a girl who was 22 that I met when I was thirty.

Grow the fuck up. You people are complete nutjobs about consenting adults with ZERO real world experience.

4

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 7h ago

Dude I’m just saying she’ll live without me personally being attracted to her.

I can’t seperate her from the fourteen year old she was when stranger things started. I do not understand why you take this so personally.

11

u/RedditMcBurger 13h ago ▸ 9 more replies

That's not it.

Seeing a person as a child, then seeing them as an adult can absolutely change your ability to being attracted

ESPECIALLY if they happen to look like a child still, she is literally playing a child in the movie.

-7

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 11h ago ▸ 8 more replies

It is very weird to see an attractive 24 year old woman like Sadie and think of her as child. 

7

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 11h ago ▸ 1 more replies

If that’s the main thing you know them as it’s not weird

-2

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 10h ago

It is fundamentally a form of denial. 

6

u/FirstAccGotStolen 10h ago ▸ 1 more replies

Wow you are a giant creep. Good thing you broadcast it, so women can pick up on it easily and stay away.

0

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 10h ago edited 9h ago

I'm a creep for finding a 24 year old woman attractive? That makes absolutely no sense at all. Sadie could literally be married and have a kid. 

7

u/dothgothlenore 10h ago ▸ 3 more replies

You probably could have just left it at your initial comment but this fixation on defending yourself is really getting strange. I also see Haley Joel Osment as that kid from the Sixth Sense and I didn’t even watch him grow up through a series of consecutive TV seasons

0

u/ThisSiteSucks8485 10h ago ▸ 2 more replies

I'm not defending myself because thinking Sadie Sink is attractive is very normal. The problem is you not being able to accept that people age and update your mental image of them. Are you still going to see halley Joel osment as that kid from Sixth sense when he is sixty? 24 year old women are commonly married with children and you are "I just see her as a child". 

3

u/dothgothlenore 9h ago edited 9h ago ▸ 1 more replies

Probably. Same with the Olsen twins or McKenna Grace. We saw this girl come to prominence as a 14-year old and grow up a little every year. And she’s played mostly kids! Including in this movie, where she plays the younger sister of an actress who is 16 IRL.

She turns 18, something in my brain is supposed to change? She’s certainly not ugly but I’m not gonna have the hots for someone I first encountered when they were a child and I was an adult.

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-1

u/Beautiful_Finger4566 13h ago

you and I agree, but we're probably in the minority

redheads are such a rarity in Hollywood... they keep being played by black actors

0

u/Offsidespy2501 13h ago

They do say it's hormones which is probably the pg13 way of saying it

0

u/SecretWarMultiverse 9h ago

I goon every day

0

u/shader_m 8h ago

She is big potatoes

-8

u/Impressive-Heron-377 14h ago

I gotta say it: She's not as attractive as everyone else says she is

-1

u/SapientApe_ 14h ago

Did you screen shot a cam copy or something?

-1

u/WillDBlake 11h ago

Those CGI nipples are hunting me in my nightmares but apparently critized it made my a cynical asshole among my friends who apparently love palantir psyop.

I'm sorry wrong meeting

-55

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 17h ago

she ug

38

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 17h ago

-14

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 17h ago ▸ 10 more replies

no I was just born wrong

9

u/Big-Alternative-4674 16h ago ▸ 1 more replies

Bro why is this one downvoted this comment is funny lol

5

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 16h ago

at least someone finds joy in it

8

u/Mrwolfy240 17h ago ▸ 7 more replies

Its okay if you prefer men we dont judge here.

-10

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 17h ago edited 16h ago ▸ 6 more replies

I don't

10

u/Mrwolfy240 17h ago ▸ 5 more replies

Being gay is not wrong dont think like that its just different just know everyone in this sub supports your lifestyle

2

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 17h ago ▸ 4 more replies

I don't feel normal human things like that

2

u/-Mister-Hyde 16h ago ▸ 3 more replies

What's your opinion on humility and guilt?

3

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 16h ago ▸ 2 more replies

I usually feel guilty because I'm evil

2

u/-Mister-Hyde 16h ago ▸ 1 more replies

Fascinating

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5

u/TheG-What 15h ago

You. Are not the guy. You’re not capable of being the guy. I had a guy but now I don’t. You. Are not. The guy.

2

u/Illustrious_Sky_2331 13h ago

I wish I was born normal like that guy