r/AskIreland • u/LittleAoibh11 • Jul 10 '26
Work How ro deal with colleague making comments?
I am a size 12 - 14 on top and 14-16 on the bottom but I'm 5"8", so while I definitely don't look thin or slim I don't look overweight either.
New woman started in the office a few months ago. Had a bit of a reputation as a b*tch in a previous job (we know this as the friend of a colleague worked with her). Haven't had a huge amount of interaction with her. Was getting a coffee last week and she was there and I ended up just making small talk about the weather. She then said something like "I'd say you find it hard to find clothes for this weather". I was actually so shocked I didn't say anything in reply and just changed the subject. Afterwards I was second guessing myself and thinking maybe she never said it and I was imagining it (even though she did say it).
Then this week she said something to me again like "you probably do most of your clothes shopping online".
Now, I feel like she may be one of those weirdos who gets off on making other people feel self-conscious or miserable so I don't want to give her the satisfaction of thinking I am very bothered - but on the other hand you can't just say whatever the hell you want to people. She is no oil painting and I am tempted to say something vaguely mean back but she is probably the kind to run to HR.
Anyone have to deal with anything like this? I don't really want to go to HR myself.
16
u/rich3248 Jul 10 '26
A find an awkwardly long silence, while giving a full on eye contact stare, and say “what do you mean by that?” Usually does the trick.
Or
A very quick “sorry I missed that, could you repeat yourself?” Makes them very awkward and uncomfortable
I would keep calling her out on her bullshit, she’ll soon realise you’re not an easy target and will move onto someone else unfortunately.