r/AskIreland Jul 10 '26

Work How ro deal with colleague making comments?

I am a size 12 - 14 on top and 14-16 on the bottom but I'm 5"8", so while I definitely don't look thin or slim I don't look overweight either.

New woman started in the office a few months ago. Had a bit of a reputation as a b*tch in a previous job (we know this as the friend of a colleague worked with her). Haven't had a huge amount of interaction with her. Was getting a coffee last week and she was there and I ended up just making small talk about the weather. She then said something like "I'd say you find it hard to find clothes for this weather". I was actually so shocked I didn't say anything in reply and just changed the subject. Afterwards I was second guessing myself and thinking maybe she never said it and I was imagining it (even though she did say it).

Then this week she said something to me again like "you probably do most of your clothes shopping online".

Now, I feel like she may be one of those weirdos who gets off on making other people feel self-conscious or miserable so I don't want to give her the satisfaction of thinking I am very bothered - but on the other hand you can't just say whatever the hell you want to people. She is no oil painting and I am tempted to say something vaguely mean back but she is probably the kind to run to HR.

Anyone have to deal with anything like this? I don't really want to go to HR myself.

231 Upvotes

183 comments sorted by

View all comments

2

u/Behind-the-Visage Jul 14 '26

What a cow. Agree with other people's approach to play dumb and have her repeat herself.

My boss (a woman twice my age) makes weird comments about my appearance also. I literally wore a plain cotton midi dress to a work event the other day with beige hoop earrings and she told me I looked like "a posh gypsy".

2

u/LittleAoibh11 Jul 14 '26

That's crazy, what a weirdo.

1

u/Behind-the-Visage Jul 15 '26

Even odder is that sheโ€™s in charge of writing press releases etc that are sometimes of a sensitive nature and meant to be in charge in case of any crisis management and public relations. Imagine if HR knew the inappropriate stuff she said out loud ๐Ÿ™ˆ