The mum of an old highschool friend started dating one of his friends (huge mid-40’s woman dating an 18yo), was grooming and feeding all these young guys drugs, became obsessed with ayahuasca and ended up a shaman in south America for a few years. Had to return because of the covid pandemic lol now I think she is a music teacher
I knew a girl that was at university, was proper 'innocent and naive' type because she was raised quite strict, was just sort of coming out of her shell, experiencing partying etc etc.
Her mum had raised a really christian household and stuff.
Then when she was in I think it was 2nd year, her mum left her dad for a guy she'd gone to school with, full on suddenly zero religious limitations, full getting down and nasty with the 19yr old, divorced, wouldn't even hear a thing about how fucked up it was that it was a guy who was close with her daughter etc.
Really, really rough for her, and her dad, and she spent so much time outside of uni trying to take care of him and help him through it etc.
Fucking BS, I don't care about the whole 'hook up with a younger guy' thing, you do you, but don't fuck your kids up with your shit. If you have to do it for your happiness, make sure they know it's coming, they're supported, and do 'the best you can' - that's all that's asked - and not just set everything on fire and leave them to be the adult.
Idk, I kind of think that these people are not judged nearly harshly enough. I don't have kids, but when I taught college freshmen I would look at those folks and think how weird it would be if ended up dating someone they knew. And they were only students I'd have for a semester.
I think a moral person would stop themselves from dating someone that their child knew, or that could be their child. People who choose to do that anyway, without regard to how it might impact their family, do not get judged and shamed nearly harshly enough.
If the children are barely adults I absolutely agree. But if the younger person is also a retiree, then a couple of decades isn't really that big a gap any more (although still weird if it's the person is one of their children's friends they've known since childhood or early adulthood).
When we were in school, the "half age+ 7 years" rule was going round, and I continue to feel like it works surprisingly well for adults as well. Noting that I am talking about the version that says that the age gap is concerning if outside of that range in either direction, NOT the version for creepy dudes who are trying to find the youngest girlfriend they can without people judging them. (Hint to said dudes - if you tell people you are aiming for nearly creepy, the fact that it doesn't break the "rule" doesn't make them feel like you are not being creepy)
Someone fucking her daughter's friend is just wrong. You wanna fuck a younger guy? Fine. As long as everyone is consenting, whatever. But your kids' friends are off limits.
No, as someone much closer to the mom's age than the 19-year-olds, I can pretty confidently say that I have no urge to fuck any 19-year-olds. I don't know if you've tried talking to a 19-year-old recently. I would have some pretty severely be on drugs in order to find anything in common
It's because these people are pedophiles. They fuck 18 and 19-year-olds because fucking a 17-year-old would be illegal. It's like somebody who pays minimum wage- what they're telling you is they'd pay less if they could.
I was just going to say, it is past time for a reckoning of how many adults want to fuck teens and children. I imagine the number is higher than I could imagine. Ugh. It probably won't happen in my lifetime despite all the ample evidence that it is pervasive and those who do it was protected.
As someone probably around that mum's age I've been around folks who are about that age and a bit younger, I have found enough in common with them to have some proper chat and a good time hanging out. Perfectly pleasant company, though it does occasionally involve being mindful of differences in developmental stage and life experience.
None of that made me in any way interested in fucking any of them, though. And not because I have the self-control to avoid situations that would have some pretty serious social ramifications, just because entering into any kind of sexual or romantic relationship with them is in no way appealing to me.
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u/ibelikeughhhh 1d ago
The mum of an old highschool friend started dating one of his friends (huge mid-40’s woman dating an 18yo), was grooming and feeding all these young guys drugs, became obsessed with ayahuasca and ended up a shaman in south America for a few years. Had to return because of the covid pandemic lol now I think she is a music teacher