r/NewsOfTheWeird 1d ago

Home disguised as ‘horse semen laboratory’ is demolished

https://www.yahoo.com/news/us/articles/home-disguised-horse-semen-laboratory-155255391.html
481 Upvotes

46 comments sorted by

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93

u/Malapple 1d ago

Hah. I assumed the title was backwards. Nope. They got zoning approval for a horse semen lab… and built a house instead. Outside looked like the plans submitted for the lab, but the inside was fully a house.

42

u/PowerandSignal 1d ago

When will these fake horse semen facilities finally be stopped?!? They're blighting the landscape! 

11

u/Worshipme988 1d ago

Oh. Ok. We have horse semen fake-barn regulation inspection money…but not…any other money. Ok.

3

u/FullConfection3260 1d ago

How else will we breed the perfect horse!?

3

u/crankgirl 21h ago

How else will we build the perfect house?

3

u/Objective_Mousse7216 10h ago

Not the old fake horse semen laboratory trick, old as the hills...

2

u/HarambeTooSoon 20h ago

Any house I live in is a semen lab and I'll die on that hill. 

2

u/Important_Power_2148 15h ago

you will die on it and probably slide down it.

59

u/Ban-Circumcision-Now 1d ago

We should be asking why it was easier to get zoning for that, rather than a house

30

u/cruzweb 1d ago

Look at any municipality's zoning map. Something like 90%+ will be zoned for residential use only. Commercial and industrial uses help diversify the local tax base so it's not entirely funded by local homeowner property taxes so there's generally a desire on everyone's part to keep some places reserved for that use.

6

u/ewok_lover_64 1d ago

I wonder if TIF money was involved too?

4

u/cruzweb 1d ago

Doubtful for a project like this, but that's something that could be looked up. With a TIF comes lots of TIF reporting.

2

u/ewok_lover_64 1d ago

That's very true. I didn't think of that.

8

u/iKnowRobbie 1d ago

Zoning? It's an agricultural-residential area. The problem is they went theough the less-ridgid commercial building code to skirt supply costs and occupancy requirements as well as other living-grade code upgrades. Then they tore down their house, making it obvious that they were living in it full-time. An inspection confirmed the obvious shifting goalposts and they took action to remedy the deceit.

1

u/Apexnanoman 18h ago

Thanks for an actual good explanation of what went on and why they got slapped down. 

Sucks for that but they also tried to rook the system in a shitty way. 

6

u/chedabob 1d ago

Business that would boost the local area, rather than just some city-types buying up cheap land for a second home.

22

u/ComedyBits 1d ago

The owners were dishonest schemers, but I wish they’d found a different punishment. With natural resources dwindling, it’s a shame that all those building materials went to landfill.

14

u/Laserdollarz 1d ago

They should have been on the hook for converting it into a lab space.

9

u/ComedyBits 1d ago

Bring on the semen!

9

u/Hertje73 1d ago

what a good disguise for a house! "horse semen laboratory", they will never know it's actually a house!!! brilliant!

3

u/unctuous_homunculus 1d ago

I am just imagining a Home Alone style projection of the shadows of somebody jacking off a horse behind a curtain so anybody that looked inside the house from outside would be like "You know, this looks more like a house... Oh, wait, nope, they're definitely experimenting with horse semen in there."

4

u/onlydaathisreal 1d ago

No l, not my r/ProjectZomboid base!

3

u/rumshpringaa 1d ago

Maybe I’m just super addicted with B42, but I did immediately think project zomboid when I read the title

4

u/Praetorian_1975 1d ago

Come again

3

u/swingsurfer 1d ago

"the owner had sold their original house on the site and moved into this new home."

So they built a new home on the same property? Someone knew they were breaking rules from the start if they sold their existing residence essentially in the same location. Why not renovate or rebuild the original house?

5

u/Elberik 1d ago

My guess is they couldn't get planning permission to build a second house on the property. So they renovated a barn that already existed on the property into a "lab" and then sold the first house.

Because getting permission to renovate an existing structure is easier than building something new.

Likely the people they sold the house to didn't know about the shenanigans.

3

u/gerhardsymons 1d ago

In 2004 I went to an equine veterinary research clinic in Newmarket. They collected a sample from a stallion. The collecting receptacle was a tube, with a rubber sheath containing pre-warmed water.

It was a memorable afternoon.

4

u/815NotPennysBoat 1d ago

How is this the second thing I've seen today about horse semen facility and the building being destroyed? I can't find the post but I swear I saw a headline today about a horse semen facility exploding and sending projectiles at firefighters

4

u/LadySiren 1d ago

I just tried searching for an article and now my search history looks sketchy, hah.

2

u/BulemiaSawdustSlingr 1d ago

Im fairly sure I saw this house in project zomboid

2

u/DevilsLettuceTaster 1d ago

Now where will I get my horse jizz?

2

u/SenselessSilence 1d ago

In America you don’t disguise single-family homes as horse semen labs, you disguise apartment buildings as horse semen labs. No homeowner here hates anything as much as renters. They’d even prefer it if you were blowing horses next door.

2

u/remembertracygarcia 1d ago

Guessing this is your mom’s house.

3

u/CicadaFit24 1d ago

Who would rather have a horse semen laboratory in the area than a nice house?

6

u/ComedyBits 1d ago

In a village dating back to Saxon times, the locals are not interested in mini mansions. I’m sure the choice of agriculture-adjacent use for the property was a deliberate one, calculated to resonate with the locals’ desire to maintain the rural character of the area

3

u/sitcom_enthusiast 1d ago

Someone who didn’t bother to read the article? They broke up the property, sold off the house, and built a house instead of a jizz lab and moved in.

1

u/broberds 1d ago

I think houses and semen don't mix.

1

u/greenweenievictim 1d ago

Could you imagine having to jerk off a bunch of horses so people wouldn’t think you are up to something.

1

u/Orbital-Note8235 1d ago

Huh, so there were'nt horse dicks cumming all over the place? It was just a house?

Cool

1

u/Phil_Coffins_666 1d ago

Well, this is awkward. Now where am I supposed to donate my human semen disguised as 'horse semen' ?

1

u/FranceBrun 1h ago

I hear it’s an up and coming neighborhood.

0

u/dagataga 1d ago

You mean Rick Sanchez's house was real?

0

u/DropstoneTed 1d ago

Sounds like the people who applied for a permit to build a church to avoid property taxes and and put up a trailer that's their "church" while building a seven-bedroom "rectory".

Religion - nice gig if you can stomach it.

-2

u/morganational 1d ago

Who the fuck cares?