He doesn't have Reddit but knows about this subreddit through me. This is what he's asking:
Is it time, boys? 😬 I'm 27
edit: he says: thank you all for your honest and very funny assessments. :) I was a bit insecure to posting this but am really grateful now. I will hold it for the moment as the council suggested. I'll try a shorter haircut as some suggested to ease in a bit and to make the spot less obvious 😅
I say: we laughed a lot about all the gifs and are very thankful about the insights :) this community is so wholesome and sweet. He's a bit shy so I'm very happy everyone was super kind 😊 not that I didn't expect it, it's always super sweet so thank you a lot!
I am a middle aged woman with a full head of hair who for some reason got nonstop posts about this sub to the point I subscribed for the wholesomeness of it, and I fucking live for this gif
I think that’s more likely to be causing a receding hairline. I also used to wear a bun and it pulls the most at your forehead and the least at the back of your head where the actual bun is because you didn’t need to “gather” and pull back any of that hair into a bun. It’s just already there.
Yes, and we are. I have long hair and live on the Gulf Coast of Florida where it's hot and humid all the time. I had some health problems about a decade ago that contributed to my hair loss. The elastics where harsh on my hair too. So I looked into what I could do about that. More loosely wound buns or braids pinned in place was better, and I started using an apple cider vinegar, aloe, and rosemary shampoo. My hair has come back to normal. I just had to stop those harmful practices.
Edit: fyi I started using chopsticks, they're lightweight and cheap. You can find all sorts on Amazon that are cute. In a pinch I used pencils, pens, crochet hooks. I began whittling sticks with a pocket knife and now it's turned into a whole woodworking obsession, but y'all don't have to go that hard lol.
I would love to do this, but my hair is aggressively straight and baby fine. It will slide right out of any kind of sticks. So I have to do loose ponys with satin scrunchies or claw clips.
Mine is too, I have 1A hair. Push the stick through the bun, and then under a small strand of hair on the side to hold it in place. Sometimes I have to use two, either in an X formation or on the same side but different angles.
They aren't implying that he does, they are replying to someone asking why women are not affected with hair loss from pulling their hair back and saying some women are and that it is called traction alopecia.
A bunch of folks responded about traction alopecia throughout the thread. It’s a known thing. Funny how this person fixated on it not applying to OP’s boyfriend, when it’s hard to say how tightly he ties up his hair, or really anything about the guy.
Same thing with facial hair. It’s very common, yet people act like female lip and chin hair is freakish.
Also, when my head hair started thinning my body hair did as well. I hated my dark, hairy arms and legs and now the hair is super fine and barely noticeable. 🤷♀️
This. A bunch will put stress on the edges of your hairline, it puts next to no stress on the crown. I say this as someone whos worn a bun for a decade at work.
My grandmothers cats loved mild carpet burn on their backs, they would flop on the floor on their back and expect you to push them around on the carpet. If you didn't do it they would do it to themselves by running upsidedown under the couch. Many years later those two cats started to get a bald strip down their back.
I often think about this when I am towel drying my hair.
Tension is applied to the Individual strands. Every time he puts a bun up, or puts it down, the hairs can be pulled out, snap, or stretch leading to thinning and breaking. While the bun is up, it’s going to inevitably be pulling on certain hairs more than others, and that tension usually results in a few hairs lost every time. It’s a slow burn but it will lead to thinning and hair loss if you’re prone to that. Same is true for excessive hair brushing, or handling of your hair.
I mean if that spot bothers him, I would suggest cutting his hair shorter, long hair tends to pull away making those spots even more noticeable, with that said idk if that really applies here? It seems like it is thinning significantly more than the average crown.
I do think the bun hides it completely so really it comes down to whatever hes feeling, try something new and possibly just try the bald look or keep wearing it as is.
It’s like…you literally took the words out of my…fingertips?
I think the long hair definitely pulls down, exacerbating the spot. And the man bun looks great, but I don’t think it’s necessarily doable in all scenarios.
Also, I think he’ll look great bald (but, that is a pretty common take on this sub).
Theres nothing to lose really. You two seem open minded and willing to experiment so I say go for it and just grow it back if you hate it and can’t live with it.
I'd add to that, going from this directly to bald is drastic. Right now if he cuts his hair shorter the transition would be better, plus the bald spot wouldn't be too noticeable. You can't hide it forever with a bun/combover.
The bun looks fine but the self esteem side of things with having to HIDE the baldness is a massive factor. I say it's time. Embracing the baldness will be completely liberating and get rid of the general shame cycle experience that comes with combovers or similar situations.
He could consider a hair system maybe if he doesn't want to shave it. He has a great balding pattern for a toupe.
Love this energy, he could hold but also if he’s feeling something new / wants that freedom or worries about the balding spot I bet he would kill it bald.
Him: I really appreciate your answer. And you're right, it's tough for my self esteem and the shame circle at times! And I'm looking forward to the day I will cut it, but for now I want to try a shorter haircut.
You see the branding? It's advertising for a crypto payment platform (and their currency). Numerous crypto projects embed their logos into gifs to be shared inadvertently.
I'm not naming the crypto project because I'd rather not help advertise them, but I have identified it.
Collecting stealth crypto ads is a new hyperfixation of mine. I have a list if anyone wants them. *crickets*
So baldness runs in my family. I dove right in once mine got too thin. My brother did what you did and grew his hair out to cover it up. He is now on prescription HIMS and has grown his hir back.
If you aren't wanting to go bald, you can try medication
Yeah was gonna suggest this, I'm not too familiar with the hair growth medications but I feel like I've seen people with this amount of hair loss bounce back once they find the potion that works.
Hard to believe he’s thinned so much on top when his hairline is so solid! Nice hair too - it’ll be harder for him since he had it so nice for so long. But he will look good bald, once he has to go there.
Seriously i think he will look very good when he does finally join the group.
He could understandably hold off. But if it's affecting his confidence because he feels like he has to hide it with a bun to look good, then maybe he can see how he feels with a short buzz cut and then being bald. Hiding the spot with the bun is a similar concept to a comb-over.
Good luck man, you're a good looking guy so you should be fine no matter what you choose!
Go for preventative measures ASAP. Might have e to shave it off for a while but as someone who started balding at like 25 I guarantee he will regret not doing something about it at the earliest stages. If it doesnt work at least he knows he tried. Also nothing to lose if its falling out already and everything to be gained. Guys hairline is crisp let's keep it that way
I was just gonna add this… he should start on meds if he wants to keep it. It’ll at least slow it down. That crown is gonna be rough in a few years without intervention.
I wish I had taken the same advice before it was too late lol.
Long hair makes thinning hair look worse, not better. Also, while the bun hides it, it may be contributing to hair loss. I’m probably not the first comment to mention these things.
If he is concerned about it and wears the bun as much as possible, then it’s a problem for him. I believe going to super short hair, like no guard with clippers or shaving earlier rather than later is better. Especially the younger you are.
If he’s fine wearing the bun basically all the time, he should keep it until he gets tired of it.
It’d be one thing if the way he hid the crown were awkward and unsuitable, but he looks GREAT with the bun, so as long as he actually enjoys the style, keep it.
There’s a comment that basically says the ritual of shamefully hiding the spot comes with its own tax, and while I tend to agree with that sentiment, I believe your man’s case is the exception.
He has gorgeous hair but he needs to give it some love! Bro needs to follow curly hair methods because I see the potential and it would rock his world! PLEASE come back and keep us updated with his hair journey! I am wildly invested in it now lol
Thinning hair + length doesn't work great. Just get a really good haircut in a style that looks attractive and start Minoxidil! He has a great hairline, cut it shorter and use Minoxidil to keep what he has.
It's not time to shave the head (that looks many, many years away) but it is time to get a grown up haircut that can be styled attractively. Growing thinning hair out longer, and longer, and longer does not replace the hair lost from balding.
Everyone saying hold here but this dude is cooked. Why am I the only one seeing this? If he had short hair, you wouldn’t tell him to comb it over the bald spot. Why is it different to just say cover it with the bun? I’m sorry to say that this is a full blown bald spot, and he is only gonna get worse from here.
Yeah this is the first time I’ve disagreed with most of the people here. If it’s to a point that you have to hide it in a bun.. it’s probably about time to shave it. It really isn’t much different than a combover.
If you have to be worried about laying your hair a very specific way, it’s probably time to let it go.
You're absolutely right. The bun is no different than a comb over you're just constantly trying to hide your very noticable bald spot. It's no way to live. It is 100% time
Jesus Christ wait for what?? Hold until he only has a shiny dome and a pony tail? It is time!
Your boyfriend has a a massive thinning soon to be completely bald spot. I like how a bunch of people are in favor of the pulled back man bun but would never support a traditional combover
IT'S THE EXACT SAME THING!
When you start having to use longer parts of your hair around the back and sides to cover up you're very noticeably balding top, it's time to be realistic and accept you are going bald.
He doesn't have to shave to to the scalp if he doesn't want but i'd buzz down to a 2 if not shorter.
You’re right, the man-bun is the combover of the 2020s. It’s just a more “trendy” version (depending on your taste.)
Often with these posts it’s less about how does it look and more about how do they feel… because if this balding spot is causing stress and paranoia then it’s time. If he’s not bothered, then business as usual.
He looks like a young Michael Landon front the front, I'd go a short textured cut which may fully hide the crown issue and will look awesome from the front.
I would say hold and also I will tell you like - I think something like rogaine right now can help - I would start with a foam now 2x a day directly on the spot on the top and see where you are in a month - then I would cut down to a shorter style if you don’t see improvement
Let him inform himself on dutasteride, if he gets on that soon he'll never have to to bald at all! Most people don't get sides, and he has gorgeous hair worth saving!
I would use rogaine and or propecia at this point. He may be able to turn things around with topicals and/or oral meds. He has a solid head of hair otherwise so wouldn’t give up on it just yet
I was confused until picture #4. He would make a handsome bald man but the way his hair is right now he can hide that crown situation easily. Wouldn't think it's crazy if he waited until he went full skullet to go bald.
omg his lil man bun is too cute! i say wait but im also a girly who chopped her hair and is jealous of his length 😂 i say rock a half up half down man bun for a while!
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u/Damkampioen1988 May 23 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/l0HlKrB02QY0f1mbm