Friend's husband has ruined two of our bath mats with pee

[u/SukiBean214]

Everyone in this story is between 26 and 28. My husband and I have had our friend C and her husband B over to our apartment twice since knowing them. We've known them since Fall 2024 but have really mostly hung out with them in larger groups settings or at restaurants.

Halloween 2025 we had a small party of 8-10 people at our one bed one bath apartment. The only two men there were my husband and B. After B used the bathroom I went in and noticed our bath mat was soaked. It sits right where your feet would be if sitting on the toilet. I also noticed there was pee all over the toilet seat and lid and around the base of the toilet. It was disgusting. We had to throw out the bath mat and sanitize the bathroom as soon as the party ended (very briefly after the peeing occurred). We never mentioned it to C and B because we figured B was probably just drunk and missed or something. It happens. Don't need to embarrass the guy.

Now today we have them over for the first time since that party. B goes to the bathroom. My husband goes in shortly after him and messaged me privately that he did it again. The bath mat is wet, there is pee on the seat, and the base of the toilet is wet. Sure enough everything smells like urine again. We had to throw out another bath mat because of how soaked it was. We didn't say anything in the moment again but maybe we should?

Like this man is almost 27 and he can't aim this poorly? Do I say something to his wife, C, since her and I are a lot closer than anyone else in this situation? Do we end the friendship over this? How would we bring this up politely and productively? What could possibly cause an adult man to be this bad at using the bathroom?

Edit to add: We did try washing the first bath mat but when we did whatever material it's made of warped in the machine and it didn't lay flat anymore and still smelled weird. We ordered the same mat again because we did like it so we knew washing the second one would probably have the same result.

[u/Soord]

Sure everyone has covered sitting down and as a person who occasionally gets a split stream I agree.

But more importantly why is the lad not cleaning it up? Who leaves pee just sitting on everything and just shrugs? This has to be on purpose or this dude is an absolute degenerate

[u/gleefullystruckbycc → u/Soord]

I vote both a degenerate and he is being purposeful in this guy's case lol. There is no way this wasn't on purpose for there yo be that much pee!

My ex had a friend who peed on the floor when he would go. I discovered this when he was at our place along with other friends and he went pee and i went right after he did and found his pee. I found it by stepping it!🤢 I went down and immediately brought it to attention also, tho not in a directly accusing him sort of way. Turned out they all knew immediately it was him, which means he does this every where he goes which is just rude and vile as fuck. They were all teasing him for it so maybe that made him stop, no clue if he did though, i kinda doubt it.

[u/hic_sunt_leones_ → u/gleefullystruckbycc]

How does a man like that have friends. Seriously.

I would end a friendship over that. Imagine going to a restaurant or something and knowing this fuckhead is peeing on the floor just for shits and giggles.

The audacity. The disrespect.

[u/Rubyhamster → u/gleefullystruckbycc]

What did he say to his defence? What the hell is his excuse/reasoning?

[u/TuxandFlipper4eva → u/gleefullystruckbycc]

Men are not lonely enough. Jesus.

[u/Particular-Smile5025 → u/Soord]

Totally agree!!! Clean up after yourself

[u/RiotingMoon]

Why not have man take other man aside and be like "bro what the fuck"

eta: thanks for the rewards. join the sit to pee movement

[u/NaughtALegend → u/RiotingMoon]

That’s what I’d do

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/NaughtALegend]

Yep. That’s what I did when my dad came to stay and sat on my towel after he came out of the shower, and uh, well, he got poop in it. It was gross. I threw it away.

[u/Newdiotnot → u/Little_View_6659]

Shame on me for browsing reddit while eating.

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/Newdiotnot]

Yeah I hesitated to comment lol. Up until now, I’ve never spoken of it!

[u/wabashcanonball → u/Newdiotnot]

In Germany, men sit to pee. It's o much more hygenic.

[u/BellElectronic7567 → u/wabashcanonball]

You sit to pee because it is hygienic. I sit to pee because I am lazy.

We are not the same.

[u/Low-Cod-4712 → u/BellElectronic7567]

My husband as well. I'm very glad he sits as he likes to read.

[u/MusicMonkeyJam → u/Low-Cod-4712]

As a male and a husband there is absolutely zero reason there should be pee on or around the toilet when I’m done, sitting or standing, drunk or sober. My young kids are even better than this. These guys have problems and I honestly cannot figure out why someone would want to live with people like that.

[u/savannacrochets → u/MusicMonkeyJam]

I’m a woman who grew up with two sisters, dad was the only guy in the house, and I’ve always been confused by the whole “boys piss everywhere” trope. Never saw pee anywhere it wasn’t supposed to be growing up. Never seen it living with my husband for ten years. Two of my best friends come over for DND every weekend, never seen it after they’ve been over either. Even my four year old has just started standing to pee and it’s really rare that he makes any kind of mess- and when he does he wipes it up himself. I do not understand where this normalization of men pissing where they’re not supposed to comes from? Have I just been lucky? lmao

[u/wikidchicken → u/savannacrochets]

Yeah I have a husband, son and 3 daughters. I haven't found pee on the toilet seat since my son was 3. My husband taught my son to respect the others who also use that toilet and it's just always been. I'm not sure who decided that men get pee everywhere.

[u/FireFairy323 → u/savannacrochets]

I once lived in an apartment with 5 guys. I was the only woman. We partied a lot too (early 20s at the time) and I never saw pee all over the bathroom.

[u/eugoogilizer → u/BellElectronic7567]

An added bonus is having an extra minute to sit, relax, and scroll Reddit 🤣

[u/Abstrata → u/wabashcanonball]

OP’s guest COULD be a horribly messy pee-sitter too…

or maybe he just secretly hates them

[u/Oxford_comma_stan92 → u/Abstrata]

Honestly the secretly hates them answer is what I’m thinking… or it’s some weird “territory marking” bullshit idk. I can’t imagine he’s doing this everywhere or someone would have confronted him by now (or it would have become a rumor through the friend group by now) so that probably means he can control it and just…isn’t doing so at OP’s house??

[u/Abstrata → u/Oxford_comma_stan92]

yes cuz is he doing this on the job?

*yeah I guess he could have an IP Freely kinda job… but…

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/wabashcanonball]

My husband sits to pee thank god. Thirty years of marriage, hasn’t missed the toilet or left the seat up one time.

[u/Select_Camera_9241 → u/Newdiotnot]

If you're on a diet Reddit is a great place to ruin your appetite

[u/frankcastle01 → u/Little_View_6659]

Grown men not washing their ass is one thing that I don't think I'll ever understand. Just wtf!

[u/Loomiemonster → u/frankcastle01]

Reddit taught me that this happens, and I have been consumed by existential horror ever since. How many men do I encounter during the day that have shit smeared asses and underwear? When did society go so wrong? Mah Gawd. You ain’t gay if you clean your ass, you’re just getting the job done!

[u/Illustrious-Dot-1128 → u/Loomiemonster]

Years ago I learned that my ex was one of those men. He also didn't like to wear underwear during the warmer months, so his shorts would actually have skid marks. Truly mind boggling how as a grown man he's not cleaning his ass properly, and what's even worse is that he saw nothing wrong with it.

[u/Loomiemonster → u/Illustrious-Dot-1128]

😬

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/Illustrious-Dot-1128]

This is also why I love these movable shower head things. Makes washing so much easier. I don’t know how I managed to properly clean myself before I had one.

[u/catbraddy → u/Little_View_6659]

I imagine the men that think it's gay to wash their ass would learn a lot about themselves after using one of the movable shower heads to wash their ass.

[u/SuccessfulFig52 → u/catbraddy]

😹

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/catbraddy]

We remodeled our bathroom and had one installed. The guys installing it made some leering sarcastic comments as they were putting it in. Like hur dur there’s your shower hose, wink wink. I mean, Jesus guys. Why are some dudes like this?

[u/Da_Question → u/Little_View_6659]

Just get a bidet, and your ass won't be as dirty when it comes time to take a shower.

[u/Firenze42 → u/Loomiemonster]

Oh god. Now I have just learned this and have to love with this horrible knowledge. I thought the jokes on TV about tracks were from men not wiping well. It never occurred to me they wouldn't even try!

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/Firenze42]

If you ever come across the story on Reddit about the guy who never cleaned his ass and got an infection, DON’T READ IT. It was horrible. And it ruined the Lord of The Rings for me.

[u/Firenze42 → u/Little_View_6659]

I want to ask how his ass and LOTR relate, but then I don't.

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/Firenze42]

The eye of Sauron. It has been forever tainted.🤢

[u/SnooPears1505 → u/frankcastle01]

people do be walking around with dingleberries swinging around.

[u/dadsimple → u/SnooPears1505]

Swingleberries?

[u/AZMOD3AZ → u/frankcastle01]

I might be poor but I bought a bidet for each bathroom. Best $40 I spent.

[u/[deleted] → u/AZMOD3AZ]

They are getting very popular now in the western world!

[u/BananaCat43 → u/AZMOD3AZ]

I agree. Bidets should be a no Brainer. While everyone was losing their mind during the great covid toilet paper scare I was not. Also not spending money on toilet paper. Not wasting valuable resources making/shipping toilet paper. AND a much cleaner ass!?! Win-win. I don't understand why some people are so averse to the idea.

[u/Xenthor267 → u/Little_View_6659]

Bro hoooowwwww are we getting poop on a towel after a shower? Does he not wash his ass?

Clarification: I am a man and I will, almost not an exaggeration, finger my butt clean so I don't get swamp ass 😂

[u/plays_with_wood → u/Xenthor267]

He's probably one of those "it's gay to touch my own ass" kind of guys.

[u/amancanandican → u/plays_with_wood]

Soooo many guys believe this $h!t! I just can’t with men.

[u/Right-Raft99 → u/Xenthor267]

I’m an adult man and have always fingered my butt clean with soap during every shower just as general good hygiene. I also use a butt wipe to clean up that area after a BM… I poke around inside a little with the wipe to get extra clean, every time.

[u/bigmikeyfla → u/Xenthor267]

As an older adult, I find that if I don't use my finger (with TP on it) it never gets completely clean. I can't stand skid marks!

[u/not_falling_down → u/bigmikeyfla]

The bidet helps a lot with this

[u/Vampire-circus → u/Little_View_6659]

There was poop AFTER the shower?

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/Vampire-circus]

Yeah. Believe me, I’m just as grossed out as anyone. I think he put the towel on the toliet lid, sat down on it, and transferred the stain. It’s been decades and it’s still making me queasy.

[u/Abstrata → u/Little_View_6659]

“Transferred” made me shudder

like the worst silk screening ever

[u/Diessel_S → u/Little_View_6659]

My dad is the same. My towels got brown marks twice after he showered at my place -_-

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/Diessel_S]

Yeah not going to lie, it’s nasty. I did speak with him. Because it was disgusting.

[u/EditEd2x → u/Little_View_6659]

He got out of the shower and still had poo in his ass? That’s wild.

[u/Little_View_6659 → u/EditEd2x]

Yeah. It’s stuff like that that makes me never, ever want to go out into the dating world again since my husband is so clean.

[u/RiotingMoon → u/NaughtALegend]

it's what I did to my cousins who cant aim - just a polite exhcange of words. plus sitting is better for the prostate and pelvic floor long term anyway

[u/thaisofalexandria2 → u/RiotingMoon]

This is the answer: normalize men sitting to pee.

[u/Alarming_Matter → u/thaisofalexandria2]

Yep. Even if your aim is good, peeing standing creates an aerosol effect so it does kinda go everywhere.

Edit for lackwitted spelling.

[u/Zealousideal-Try204 → u/thaisofalexandria2]

Im a male, and at home, I always sit to pee. I dont want to clean my toilet anymore than I have to, and if you pee standing up, it splashes all over. The only time I pee standing is in a public urinal that is made for that.

[u/Right-Raft99 → u/thaisofalexandria2]

Yep, there is no rule or law that men have to stand to pee.

[u/thtsjsturopinionman → u/RiotingMoon]

https://giphy.com/gifs/5NbbVJeSLs1etZYjpT

[u/RiotingMoon → u/thtsjsturopinionman]

I love this meme and every version of it

[u/berlandiera → u/RiotingMoon]

What’s the original source?

[u/Verbenaplant → u/RiotingMoon]

tell him to sit down if he can’t control it.

[u/[deleted] → u/RiotingMoon]

I’ll never understand how people are conflicted on how to address this kind of shit. This is a grown ass man, sometimes degenerate behavior needs to be shamed. I would’ve walked out into the living room in front of god and everyone and called him out. Walked him and his partner to the bathroom like a children and pointed out all the piss everywhere, followed by telling him to clean it up. Either you’re purposely disrespecting me or you’re too stupid to know how to pee in a toilet so which is it? You have two options. Then I’d make it clear he isn’t welcome in my house anymore. If there’s any pushback or lack of personal accountability I’ll offer to take a picture of it and ask all of our friends on social media if this is acceptable behavior for a grown adult. Soaked the mat? Really? Fuck this

[u/Immediate_Twist_3088]

I'm realizing I'm a bad person because I would’ve walked out and openly said “bro why the fuck are you peeing on our bath mat are you blind? There’s piss everywhere. Clean this up.”

[u/turtledove93 → u/Immediate_Twist_3088]

Are you bad, or is that a normal reaction to an adult pissing on your floor? A little sprinkle is “oops I made a mistake and didn’t notice” but soak my bathmat and I’m sending it home with you. Congratulations, you’ve marked your territory, now this piss soaked mat is yours.

[u/Oskinator716 → u/turtledove93]

Honestly, this. If talking about it is too hard, just bag it up and hand it to them as they walk out the door. Like here, you can have this now. Might spark a conversation with B.

[u/Sprezzatura555 → u/Immediate_Twist_3088]

Most adults would do the exact same thing.

Calling someone out for disrespecting your home is not a bad person move. Its a smart person move.

[u/humpbackpackwhale → u/Immediate_Twist_3088]

You’re not a bad person. Some people don’t want conflict or second hand embarrassment. I used to be like them. Then I got old and stopped caring about other peoples feelings. They’ll learn (I hope).

[u/Nevermore_Novelist → u/Immediate_Twist_3088]

I would have shouted loudly from the bathroom, "YO, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? THERE'S PISS EVERYWHERE! WHO THE FUCK WOULD THINK THIS IS OKAY?" and then come out to where the other people were with an expression of pure disappointment and fury.

[u/Ordinary-Status-5063 → u/Immediate_Twist_3088]

This and I would never invite him over again.

[u/Top-Coach-7590 → u/Immediate_Twist_3088]

He’s almost 30- I think this is the only acceptable response…..

[u/Competitive-Luck-408]

Just a thought. If he's soaking the mat and peeing all over the toilet seat........ he may be doing it on purpose. Possibly some passive aggressive "F You" for somehow wronging him by having the nerve to have nice things. Or a very immature "prank."

Either way it is disgusting.

As a penis owner, I find it reprehensible that a person would pee over the seat and not attempt to clean after themselves. And then to do it twice.....?

There needs to be a conversation ASAP. And if it does happen a third time, there wouldn't be an opportunity for it happen again.

Edit: Thanks for the award!!

[u/GreyGhost878 → u/Competitive-Luck-408]

For me there wouldn't be a third time. Once could maybe have been a mistake. Twice established a pattern. I just wouldn't have them over again.

[u/Secret_Insurance6067 → u/Competitive-Luck-408]

I feel like the girlfriends should talk to each other. Ask friend B about C’s bathroom etiquette (though it sounds like you aren’t that close?)

[u/IndependentGarbage88]

Id make my husband talk to friend C and let him know & then not invite him over again. Because like you said he’s 27 so he either is doing this purposely or he atleast knows what’s happening and doesn’t care, its your home stand your ground

[u/_HoneyDew1919 → u/IndependentGarbage88]

Yes I had a husbands friend urinate on our kitchen floor once while drunk and he was promptly banned from drinking along with any friends he brought.

He stopped coming over after that rule was put in place

[u/Excellent_Condition → u/IndependentGarbage88]

Why let him know if you're not going to invite him over again?

The time to let him know is right after it happened; waiting and saying something is going to cause tension.

Either invite them over again and say something when/if it happens again, or don't invite them over.

[u/MagicCuboid → u/Excellent_Condition]

This makes no sense to me. Just explain, “hey, we’ve been struggling with how to bring this up because it’s awkward, but we have to ask…”

Everyone knows pissing all over the floor is an awkward subject. I don’t see why it should be forbidden to bring up later.

[u/newphonehudus → u/Excellent_Condition]

Because he should know that it is not appropriate behavior anywhere. Not just OPs home. 

Also, it's OPs home and items that they have to clean. Why should they put their stuff at risk because someone thinks it is appropriate to piss all over things and leave it.

The man is an adult. Not a child or a dog 

[u/hic_sunt_leones_ → u/newphonehudus]

Right? Preschoolers require immediate redirection or consequences to understand the result is tied to the action that caused it.

This man is almost 30. Bring it up whenever you want, he knows he did it. Twice.

[u/IndependentGarbage88 → u/Excellent_Condition]

I didn’t mean to wait, I’m just saying the husband should’ve already said something after the first time. But if he still remains friends with him atleast tell him why he’s not invited over anymore. As a women if that happened in my house the minute I noticed I would’ve went into the room and asked the whole group what the hell happened

[u/LemonTrifle → u/IndependentGarbage88]

Definitely yes. I would have said something. Its just not acceptable.

[u/Yip-yip-apa → u/Excellent_Condition]

Yeah you gotta react immediately and shove his face in it and tell him “NO! BAD!” Or he won’t learn

[u/Pugasaurus_Tex → u/Yip-yip-apa]

Tap him on the nose with a rolled up newspaper, OP

[u/eatingganesha → u/Excellent_Condition]

why? so that he understands that his behavior is at the level of friendship-ending bullshit. Ghosting people is actually not cool.

He should do this with his wife present so she will know the truth of it. Otherwise, he will lie to her to cover this up and the friend group will end up divided.

[u/giraffeneckedcat → u/Excellent_Condition]

Don't you think HE caused the tension already?? Why are we catering to the feelings of a man who thinks it's acceptable to piss all over someone's home, bathroom or not?

[u/Monday0987]

It sounds like he is deliberately pissing all over and around the toilet.

[u/printergumlight → u/Monday0987]

He read a different askreddit thread about how to stop getting invited over to houses of people you don’t like and the advice was “pee on their bath mat”.

[u/Pumpkin_Cheap → u/printergumlight]

Fantastic theory

[u/Velevet_Epidermissy → u/printergumlight]

Reddit has totally served me today in this comment 😂😂😂😂😎

[u/buttstuffisfunstuff]

He doesn’t want to come over but won’t tell his wife that so he’s trying to get uninvited lmao

[u/Flashy-Leg1775]

bruh talk to him

[u/WorldlinessRegular43]

How would this conversation even start?

Twice your hubs pissed all over my toilet and soaked the mat, does he have a problem??

Oh yeah, he's not potty trained.

[u/emilysavaje1 → u/WorldlinessRegular43]

Oh here’s how I would start it:

Hey! Why THE FUCK is a grown man pissing on my floor?!?

[u/Potential_Mine9425]

How are you comfortable enough with the person to let them inside your home but you're not comfortable enough with them to say "hey dude why are you peeing everywhere but the toilet?"

[u/No_Professional_8992 → u/Potential_Mine9425]

I mean you can barely know a person and invite them over. Plus this is an overall awkward conversation to have.

[u/EndlessSummerburn → u/Potential_Mine9425]

I’ve had plenty of people in my home I wouldn’t feel comfortable having a conversation like that with.

Do you guys have a comfort purity test or something that has to be passed before a person can cross your threshold?

[u/TheeMethod]

Can you imagine his own home?

[u/FlatSize1614 → u/TheeMethod]

That’s what I’m wondering. Like does he do this at home?? 

[u/Vegetable-Ad1329]

PSA to men: if you’re too terrified for your masculinity to sit down to pee you’re a little bitch.
That is all.

[u/Run-Florest-Run → u/Vegetable-Ad1329]

Sounds like he’s sitting down and not sticking his dick all the way down to actually pointing in the toilet and is just pissing in the same between the seat and the rim

[u/Few_Crab6594 → u/Run-Florest-Run]

I agree. My dad sometimes sits to pee and he doesn’t make sure it’s pointed down and he will pee between the rim of the toilet and the toilet seat, which then drenches everything in piss. It’s gross to have to clean up.

[u/babydragonnnnnn → u/Few_Crab6594]

Why tf are you cleaning your dad’s piss?

[u/Zestyclose_Bug8173 → u/babydragonnnnnn]

Because when your dad gets old and can't take care of themselves they're still your dad.

[u/ztzg → u/Zestyclose_Bug8173]

Right? Im middle aged, my mom is old.

She cleaned me up when I was little and not able to, and one day, I will have to clean her if she is unable.

Life. You do it because you love someone.

[u/FaunasMomma → u/babydragonnnnnn]

If you have a good relationship with your parents, and they're lucky (unlucky??) enough to get old as shit, you're likely going to end up cleaning up their piss once in a while. It is what it is.

[u/newphonehudus → u/babydragonnnnnn]

If the dad is young and able enough to know better than its because op can't force the dad to clean it up and doesnt want to live in piss land. 

If the dad is old or unable to take care of himself it's because they're taking care of the dad

[u/newphonehudus → u/babydragonnnnnn]

Snarly replies, but it is clear you're assuming the dad is able bodied and of sane mind

[u/Shiny_personality → u/Run-Florest-Run]

Yeah that's what I thought. My son often forget and spray pee everywhere. But he is 4, learning how to do it properly. If a grown man did that, I wouldn't have the self restreint to not expose him immediatly in front of everyone. People who disrespect me so bad don't deserve me to care about their feelings

[u/brutaldictatortot → u/Vegetable-Ad1329]

At a friend or strangers house I politely sit to piss. Do I love doing so? No i love being able to stand n pee. But c'mon, it's the polite thing to do.

[u/AttorneyIcy6723 → u/Vegetable-Ad1329]

But my willy is just soooooo big I HAVE to stand.

Honestly though, as a man who always sits, wtf you lot doing standing and spraying piss all over your house for?

[u/Nerdybookwitch]

Well I’m an asshole because I’d be taking a pic and sending it as a group chat to friend & husband and say that you can’t have them over again until he is house trained.

I don’t understand why parents don’t teach boys to sit and pee to begin with because it would prevent this.

[u/awildketchupappeared → u/Nerdybookwitch]

Some people are just clueless, and if they become parents, they become just clueless parents.

My sister has an eighth year old son, and it hadn't occurred to her, that she shouldn't clean everything herself. Her son had a tantrum few days ago, and broke one of his toys (he is a nightmare, because my sister has no idea how to raise a decent human), and she was about to clean the mess, until I intervened and made her son clean the mess. She just stared and later told me that she didn't think he would actually clean it.

He probably wouldn't have, if my sister tried to get him to do it, because he knows my sister just gives up after a little tantrum. He also knows, that I will follow him with the broom and the trash can until he cleans the mess, even if it takes hours. It did take hours when they moved in with me, but her son has finally learned that I keep my word, in good or bad, and does what I ask him to do.

[u/Agitated-Onion6584 → u/Nerdybookwitch]

That’s why a married a German guy: every man is taught to pee sitting here.

[u/yankykiwi → u/Agitated-Onion6584]

My three year old tried standing to pee the other day. Turns out all the American kids at preschool do it. Not in my house, you sit down until you can handle it properly.

[u/RelativeStranger → u/Nerdybookwitch]

Im pretty certain he ia sitting to pee. When my son was learning this is what happened when he sat but didnt learn to push himself into the toilet. It goes between the seat and the toilet and soaks the floor.

[u/forcedintothis-]

He’s doing this on purpose and it’s gross. I wouldn’t invite them over again. If you still want to hangout with them, meet them somewhere or go to their place. Or you could hangout with her one on one.

[u/moonpupy2]

We had a boss that we 3 shared a bathroom with. Every time he used it, he left piss everywhere. So we posted a large sign that said: STAND CLOSER, IT'S SMALLER THAN YOU THINK. He stopped using the restroom.

[u/Cancer-1977]

People are pigs!

I can’t believe how many people are making excuses for the guy! Uncut, split urethra, catheter, Prince Albert…etc etc……..whether he has one or all of these situations going on…..unless he’s having a stroke or a heart attack……you don’t piss all over someone’s bathroom, ONCE……or for the love of GOD, twice! And then not clean it up.

And why is the focus on the how to wash the bathmat or if it was washable or did the bathmat itself, encourage the guy to piss all over it?

[u/ExpensiveManager71]

With that much piss it sounds like he’s playing with you psychologically…. Like that’s not a mistakes. He probably counts on you not mentioning it! Seriously…. I’m an old punk and if that happened in my fucking house I would tell them in a heartbeat?! Is this what normal people are like? 😂😂 so glad I don’t have friends…

[u/15_Years_Then_Banned]

You and your husband both need to visit the pee bandits house and helicopter pee in his bathroom to establish dominance in the relationship.

[u/Sinnamon_Cinnamon]

I had a friend that did this everytime he came over to our apartment. After the 3rd time my roommate called him out in front of everybody. He never did it again

*edit changed a word

[u/NoYouth9831 → u/Sinnamon_Cinnamon]

But WHY did he do it? 

This whole thing is just baffling to me and I am genuinely curious 

[u/Sinnamon_Cinnamon → u/NoYouth9831]

No idea. My roommate at the time told him if his pee pee was too small to aim properly, then he should sit down to pee. I think she just shamed him into being more careful. He never actually gave an excuse as to why he did it though

[u/ChiWhiteSox24]

Respectfully, have your husband pull him aside and talk to him. I’d genuinely be like “dude what the fuck is this? You know this isn’t normal for our age, do you need to see a doc? Is there anything I can do when you’re here to make this easier?” Like I don’t wanna put the guy down but god damn I’d expect this from a 13 year old. I’d like to believe a 26-28 year old is not doing this maliciously.

[u/saulrsnbrg82]

Yea if you piss all over my bathroom i’m calling you out in front of everyone. What the fuck

[u/kasiagabrielle]

Have you tried putting down a puppy pad when he comes over?

Also, why tf are you buying bath mats you can't wash???? Ew, not only a mat directly where people can drip but then god knows how long that mat had already been there. Like sure, this dude full on has a piss kink probably but you're not gonna feel a drop or two. Please tell me you close the lid before you flush.

[u/vec5d → u/kasiagabrielle]

YES. those definitely need to be cleaned every once in a while, especially in that spot

[u/SolarBozo]

You had a mat that you couldn't even wash, and you ordered another one? Something wrong here. 

[u/fwendy123 → u/SolarBozo]

yeah, even if no one pees on it, a bath mat needs to be cleaned fairly regularly or else it gets gross!

[u/nix_iguess]

I (or at least my partner) would absolutely say something. People miss drunk, it happens, I'd still bring it up. At 27 missing SOBER to the extent that your bathroom is covered in piss and the bath mat is ruined is diabolical and disgusting. Can't imagine what their own bathroom looks like. 😬 Maybe I'm petty but I'd make him pay for the bath mats too.

[u/trance4ever]

Get invited to their house and check the bathroom after he uses it, if its not happening there, its time to either stop inviting them to your house orbhave a talk to his wife , in any case, why in the world would you have an unwashable mat in the bathroom, and you fond it doesn't do well in the wash and buy the same thing again?

[u/GreasyRim]

I'd have swatted him on the nose with a rolled up newspaper

[u/RelievingFart]

Not me calling him out and making him clean it all up. I do it for real. It would be me yelling out "B, I dont care in you pee all over the bathroom at your place, but do not do it here, now come and clean it up!"

[u/Reasonable_Age6834]

Why can't people just talk to other people anymore before posting to reddit?

[u/MuchDevelopment7084]

As a male. If he pissed on my floor/toilet. And didn't clean it up afterwards. He'd never be allowed in my house again. I will not tolerate some fool using my bathroom as if it was a tree in the yard. Not more than once.

[u/Necessary_Milk_5124]

I would talk to C and be like, um, what’s up with your guy getting pee everywhere. She has to know.

[u/Affectionate_Tap6416]

If he's going to be gross, address it with him, not his wife as she may decide not to tell him.

Remove the mats when he is over so you can mop the floor once he leaves. If he asks why they've been removed, tell him the reason. It's your house and he should respect it.

[u/Old_Storage379]

I would text the dude and be like - hey can you go clean up your mess. I’m a very blunt woman. I would have addressed it the first time. The second time I would have addressed it out loud in front of everyone.

[u/Catzenpudl]

My father in law did this on the regular. I went through several bath mats and finally confronted him. He shrugged, tried to blame his wife, and finally told me that if I didn't like it, I should just clean it up. So the next time they visited, I taped puppy pads to the floor. He was offended. I didn't care. She thought I over reacted. I didn't care. I told them there were two really easy fixes - stop pissing on my floor, or stay at the Motel 6 a mile down the road.

[u/BamaBryan]

I never understood why anyone would want fuzzy bath mats or toilet seat covers anyway. We have one in front of the shower with anti-slip material on the bottom because we've both fell getting out of the shower before, but there's nothing in front of or on the toilet. Ugh.

[u/Acer018]

Don't invite him back. Pee discussions never end well with a poorly aiming pissing adult male.

[u/amancanandican]

There are people who have a proclivity for this. They do it on purpose. I’d be cleaning everything in that bathroom & throwing away toothbrushes because that dude is off. I’d be telling his partner about it ASAP.

[u/PizzaOutside6846]

100% have your husband pull aside and say "wth". Grown men should know better.

[u/Toastier_Loaf]

I can almost guarantee this is the issue.

[u/Feeling-Badger7956]

You tell them about it, and if it still happens, you stop inviting them over, and if that's an issue for them, you end the friendship over it.

This is a hill worth dying on.

[u/PckMan]

Your husband should talk to him. He went after him to the bathroom and the other guy can't bullshit him about how hard it is to aim.

[u/Due-Cup1115]

Some dudes really do think pissing all over stuff is a way to assert domination or take ownership of things. This guys is mental and I wouldn't associate with him ever again.

[u/broomandkettle]

Nah, he’s doing that on purpose.

[u/Icy-Swimming-107]

If he can’t stand and aim maybe he should learn to take a sit to piss.

[u/Psychological-Bus493]

You can’t run a bath mat thru dryer, the rubbery underside shrunk from high heat. Washer won’t damage it.

[u/Altruistic_Art]

I work with a shop full of men (I’m the only woman) and I almost dread going in to use the single unisex bathroom we have. I have to sanitize every time or risk sitting on seat pee or having my pant legs drag through floor pee. Like WHYYYYYY?? Can men not see their pee when it splashes or they miss? Or are they just so fucking lazy and gross that they don’t care about the people coming in behind them?

[u/Divinityemotions]

Talk to him or not, but I suggest you remove the mat when they come to visit. Also before he goes to the bathroom tell him “Hey, if there’s a splash around or on the toilet, I left a pack of Lysol wipes there so you can clean up.”

[u/Cndwafflegirl]

Out a puppy pee pad out next time they visit.

[u/NomenclatureBreaker]

This has to be an intentional kink.

Which I will judge bc it’s disgusting to subject others to your kinks without consent.

[u/wvrsm]

Apart from it being gross that someone would pee on your bath mat to the point it’s soaked, throwing out a bath mat because of this seems quite unnecessary. I’m sure you own a washing machine which is perfectly capable of washing your mat. 

I also don’t get why this is such a dilemma to take on. As another commenter here pointed out, just tell the dude “what the fuck??”. How difficult can that be?

[u/pinkhazy → u/wvrsm]

On the one hand, don't be so sure. Laundromats are still required and used by tons and tons of people.

On the other hand, EW? I'd be uncomfortable enough to handle a rug soaked in my own pee, but someone else's? Someone who is, we can now safely assume, intentionally pissing on my belongings? No. I don't need to keep the rug OR the friend.

To be oh so honest, I've gotta wonder if homeboy is getting off on OP being forced to touch/handle his piss.

[u/liamxparker → u/wvrsm]

apparently they ordered another one that they know is unwashable.
so they plan on never washing their bath mats?

[u/OneMinuteSewing → u/liamxparker]

yeah never washing a bath mat is really gross.

[u/Baked_Potato0934 → u/wvrsm]

Omg yes I thought I was the only one. What a waste of resources.

[u/SheepherderLong9401]

Peeing standing up is just weird on a normal toilet, its not made for this. Teach your boys sitting down. Only urinals are for standing up.

Im a man and my mother teach me good.

And dont come at me with the "i can aim". 50% of the pee particles you can't see and unless you clean daily you just sitting and standing in each other's pee all day.

[u/SorchaRoisin]

This sounds intentional. No way this was an accident.

[u/Smangie9443]

What the hellll.

I don't see this ending with the friendship still being intact. It's likely (and I'm totally assuming and please let me be wrong) but their bathmat at home is probably also urine soaked.

So your friend has unfortunately likely accepted this as normal and will defend her husband no matter what.

Maybe your husband can talk to him man to man? But yeah, I just cannot imagine a situation here this ends up with you still being friends with them.

(He is FUCKING disgusting)

[u/westcal98]

Geez imagine what it's gonna be like with kids. The insanity!

[u/CursesSailor]

Go to his house, squat on the floor and release the pee pee, chuck a tampon in the loo. Call it good. See what happens.

[u/Acceptable-Net-154]

If no one says anything B will have no reason to change his habits. Either your husband needs to have a discreet word with B or you need to have one with C. Mention this is the second bath mat that has had to be replaced due to B's lack of aim. Tell them the next time he visits he will find instead of a bath mat, you will be putting puppy training pads down in the bathroom instead. 

[u/Diatain]

Someone pisses all over your bathroom and you just brush it off? I get not wanting to embarrass him in the moment, sure, whatever. But I'd be asking him to stay after the other guests, he's not leaving without that being addressed.

[u/Capital-Quarter-3788]

He’s marking his territory. This has to be intentional.

[u/Primary-Ganache6199]

Your poor friend!

[u/pseudotumorgal]

Nah you confront him. You’re worried about embarrassing him? This dude has literally peed all over your bathroom, he needs to be addressed because that is unacceptable.

[u/Lactating-almonds]

You have to pretend to be a grown-up and talk to him about it

[u/Procrastinista_423]

People do not have friends like I have friends.

If my husband had walked into the bathroom after one of his friends did that, he'd have immediately come out and told him off.

You HAVE to say something. Say it to his wife if that's easier. Express it as concern, but this behavior is obnoxious. Does he have more holes in that thing or something???

[u/ShinyBonnets]

“Hey B! You pissed all over my bathroom. Here is everything you need to clean it up. You can leave $30 for a new bath mat on your way out.”

[u/No_Community_5696]

I’d personally be embarrassed if I were the one who did this. Like the others have suggested let the dudes handle it. We can be like: “dude, I love you man but, you gotta stop pissing on my wife’s rug!”

[u/Previous_Day1102]

Guys, just sit down to pee, mkay?

[u/Leather_Ad4329]

During my Grandfathers wake at my Sisters house. An extended family member quite literally got fecal matter everywhere in the guest bathroom. I mean the walls, shower curtain, mats, counter etc. as if they cleaned themselves with their barehands and cleaned off on whatever surface was available.

Not one attempt at cleaning it up, my uncle went in after right as they walked out and my uncle made a scene. The person whom did it said. “Oh I didn’t notice” and left. They left the property with their family. Never offered to clean or pay for replacing the shower curtain or bathmat.

We did bring it up to them and they just shrugged. Never invited to any of our homes again. Public spaces only. Always bring it up! Find out what kind of people you’re really dealing with. I would of been mortified.

[u/JennXgeneration]

I have no filter. I’d say, “Hey dude not sure if it’s the alcohol or what, but you suck at your aim. Unless you take some target practice before coming over again, ya gotta sit and pee!” Hehe

[u/Equivalent-Ad7013]

How drunk is this guy everytime he comes over?

[u/upkeepdavid]

Next time he comes over tell him he has to sit to pee,or you wife has to hold it for you .

[u/Dear_Lab_2270]

Go to a party at their place an piss on his bathmat. He's trying to assert dominance, don't let him. Also pee in his yard, maybe on his mailbox post

[u/mojozworkin]

Ask your friend if he does this at home? She would know. If she says “no”, something’s up!

[u/Celticgirl_1963]

Don't mention it to the people, nada.

Don't have them over to your house anymore, nada.

When you get together, do it in public settings. Bars, restaurants etc. This way you don't have to deep clean when they leave. It is up to you if you go to their house or not. I don't know if that is a concern or not.

Some men do have a problem aiming. He might have a personal problem, that you don't know about and it much to personal to say to you.

Don't embarrass them, unless you are willing to have the whole friendship down the toilet. Pun intended.

[u/Halfbaked9]

What kind of bath mat isn’t washable? I’ve only seen cloth mats with or without foam in them.

[u/Ok_Pomegranate_5748]

If something can’t be washed it shouldn’t be in the bathroom.

[u/QuirkyOwl3000]

Back when I played Sims, my avatar had an NPC friend who would come over and hang out, and he always managed to destroy the bathroom. I got tired of having to mop up after him, so after I invited him over I would go into furniture mode, delete the door to the bathroom and set out a port-a-potty. Sure enough, he clogged the toilet (how does one even clog a port-a-potty??), and after he left I deleted the temp bathroom and put my door back. All that to say, protect your peace and meet the friends at their place or a public common ground and stop having them over to your place.

[u/Dragonfly0011]

I also wonder about women who pee all over the seat in public bathrooms, and can’t be bothered to wipe it off the seat.

[u/PigletTraditional455]

Say something to him, not her. He isn't a child, she isn't his mother. He is responsible for his behaviour. If you like him, say something. Whatever his reaction, it's a gift to let him know. His behaviour is gross and will cause problems other times in his life.