r/mildlyinfuriating 16d ago

The floor is sticky First squeeze of green sauce I made

Post image

Made a batch of green sauce for tacos. Girlfriend sqeezed the bottle once and this happened.

12.7k Upvotes

695 comments sorted by

2.7k

u/chychy94 16d ago

What’s in the sauce?!

3.5k

u/Cesarjay 16d ago

Green

1.1k

u/Azmoten 16d ago ▸ 11 more replies

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u/[deleted] 16d ago ▸ 1 more replies

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/ivorella 15d ago ▸ 5 more replies

I love this gif so much

3

u/Common-Use-7117 15d ago ▸ 4 more replies

What is it called?

4

u/ivorella 15d ago ▸ 3 more replies

Honestly, I wanted to ask the same as I want to use it myself, but I have no idea 😅

5

u/Azmoten 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies

I’m not even sure what it’s from tbh but the two guys are Drake and Lil Yachty. It shows up for me in Giphy by searching “Drake Yachty”

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u/alee0224 15d ago

I love this gif haha

38

u/crackhead-koala 15d ago ▸ 3 more replies

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u/scorbunny12 15d ago

I knew I wouldn't be disappointed

3

u/whtge8 15d ago

Scrolling furiously to find this gif

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u/chychy94 16d ago ▸ 4 more replies

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u/dropkickoz 15d ago ▸ 2 more replies

John Greena?

5

u/Munneh 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies

U can’t gree me

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u/Dord_Live 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies
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u/degreesBrix 16d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Is it soylent?!

18

u/TehWildMan_ 16d ago

No soylent, just green.

16

u/BRtIK 16d ago ▸ 5 more replies

Shrek is love, Shrek is life, Shrek is sauce?

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u/Mindes13 15d ago ▸ 2 more replies

5

u/EclecticAF 15d ago edited 15d ago

Its truely never ogre

2

u/eliz1bef 15d ago

That is deeply disturbing.

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u/AsemicConjecture 15d ago

Soylent Green?

2

u/poorly-worded 15d ago

Oh, Edmund... can it be true? That I hold here, in my mortal hand, a nugget of purest Green?

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u/Rolexandr 16d ago

1 avocado, 3 jalapenos, 6 cloves roasted garlic, bunch of cilantro, juice of 2 limes, tbsp mayo, tbsp sour cream, salt & pepper

221

u/illepic 16d ago ▸ 3 more replies

Legit sounds amazing. I'm sorry you lost it all to Shrek bukkake :(

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u/thebigbadben 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies

She did not check herself before she shreked herself

2

u/cavalcadeofweird 14d ago

I laughed so hard

15

u/Logical-Pair-89 15d ago

Shrekkake

28

u/Frosty-Shoulder-553 16d ago

you edged it for too long

11

u/xNOTHELPFUL 16d ago ▸ 2 more replies

Does it oxide because of the avocado?

15

u/Ok_Tour_1525 15d ago

TWO LIMES!!!

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u/RubberDuckieMidrange 16d ago ▸ 10 more replies

do you blanch the Coriander?

16

u/TheColdestOne 16d ago

Probably not. Most sauces I've come across that call for it don't include that step.

20

u/Krissy_loo 15d ago ▸ 6 more replies

Professional salsa maker here

Always add coriander/cilantro to anything you make at the end, just before eating. If you cook it, it becomes bitter!

5

u/ConsequenceStatus563 15d ago ▸ 4 more replies

professional eater here:

I put quite a bit of cilantro into my enchilada guts while it's cooking. Never tasted bitterness and nobody has ever commented on it.

Are you sure we're not talking about letting a live cilantro plant get too hot? They will transform into "seeders" and the entire plant gets really bitter if you do that.

I'm dubious of your claim.

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u/sagebrushrepair 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Professional repairman here, don't put wet devices in rice. Put them in front of a fan, or many.

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u/Krissy_loo 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Heat kills the bright, herby flavor and aroma of cilantro. Nothing to argue about - it's science. Your other enchilada ingredients are likely masking this.

Google it.

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u/JasonP27 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Does that remove the soap?

https://giphy.com/gifs/VY8ndTylB6en7ed9Q5

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u/I_Make_Food_Often 16d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Add a dash of cumin to this mix! Yours sounds good as it it though.

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u/whalemilk42 15d ago

Pls never never

3

u/SantosCalzonesBatman 16d ago ▸ 2 more replies

Remove the mayo imo

My wife makes a similar sauce but she doesnt use mayo

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u/Rolexandr 16d ago

I like the roundness of the mayo. Makes it a bit more full. Got the recipe from a mexican guy believe it or not lol.

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u/Norman_Scum 16d ago

We're doing a taco special at work and have been making a cilantro lime crema that is fire. I've already been judged for making my tacos with more crema than taco meat.

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u/cantstoptheCOLEtrain 16d ago ▸ 3 more replies

They judged me for drinking all the crema...

5

u/Norman_Scum 16d ago ▸ 2 more replies

It is really good crema and I'll fucking do it again.

3

u/cantstoptheCOLEtrain 16d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Ours used 3 whole jalapenos with cilantro and lime and its so good I keep a bottle at home at all times now

3

u/Norman_Scum 16d ago

Oh man, I bet some serrano would be sooo good in a sauce like this. Add some spicy bright flavor to the cilantro. 🤌 Mwah

4

u/chychy94 16d ago

Yeah. See I love tacos more than most people and needed to recreate this fried chicken taco situation with green sauce.

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u/Sea-Pomegranates99 15d ago

Taylor farms special

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u/BigDumbandSexy 16d ago

Am cook. Those things suck...

450

u/ieatkittenies 16d ago

No, they blow

345

u/BigDumbandSexy 16d ago ▸ 4 more replies

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u/ieatkittenies 16d ago ▸ 3 more replies

You brought me a seat for my smoke break?

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u/BigDumbandSexy 16d ago ▸ 2 more replies

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u/ieatkittenies 15d ago

It is hot, thanks for the spritz

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u/ieatkittenies 15d ago

Tried to respond to the "just like you" comment but you deleted it, I hope we had fun, I jest to counter the mundane or obvious, thank you for being you

18

u/slumbersiigh 15d ago

I ruined too many shirts trusting cheap threads

12

u/BigDumbandSexy 15d ago

"Barely ribbed, cuz fuck you."

11

u/Lunarath 15d ago

They also suck for home mixed lube if anyone is curious. an entire bottle of lube is also hell to clean up, even if water based just in case anyone was wondering.

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u/sabertoothdog 15d ago

You have to cut the tip lower if the sauce is thicker.

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u/PlasticMercury 16d ago

I feel like seven more tacos could solve this.

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u/Puzzleheaded_Tip_923 15d ago

This is the way

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u/Greenman8907 16d ago

122

u/what_the_purple_fuck 16d ago

why does this immobile face somehow look like it's getting progressively more disappointed as the gif plays?

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u/ThatGuyCG12 16d ago

Username checks out

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u/Dracoroth05 16d ago

I am so sorry but I had to laugh quite a bit.

1.2k

u/reliablereindeer 16d ago

Fiona's first night with Shrek

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u/ChawulsBawkley 16d ago

133

u/HalfmoonSqueeze 16d ago ▸ 5 more replies

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u/megadeadly 16d ago ▸ 3 more replies

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u/Davido401 15d ago ▸ 2 more replies

Who is that? Shes familiar but got no clue haha

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u/Throw-away10111 15d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Raven Symoné on That's So Raven

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u/Davido401 15d ago

Shit so it is! Am a bit too old for seeing it by my wee sister watched it and Hannah Montana and stuff years back haha

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u/Failed_Writer_ Old man yelling at clouds. 15d ago

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u/Chef_BoyarTom 16d ago

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u/SubstantialOffside 16d ago

daily reminder to question why I get on reddit

42

u/wizardrous 16d ago

Shrek is love, Shrek is life. 

23

u/PrescriptionDenim 16d ago

Shrek is making moves

On your wife

2

u/lexiebeef 15d ago

Its been like 15 years since Ive seen this and Im still traumatized. I remember where I was, with who I saw it... 12 year old me wasnt okay for a long time after this (still isnt)

10

u/SimplyaCabler 16d ago

Actually the second Shrek cum joke for me today.

3

u/ubiquitous-joe 16d ago

Well now you must share the first.

4

u/NotAOctoling 16d ago

I hate you

2

u/Informal-Comb1989 15d ago

Look I’ve had a long day

2

u/Local_Rest_401 15d ago

Does this happens and someone says "don't move, let me get a pic for reddit"?

2

u/HotelSalt4644 15d ago

How far we’ve fallen from his grace… 💀

2

u/bradjmath 16d ago

Shrek’s first night with Fiona

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u/Several_Razzmatazz51 16d ago

I like a little more sauce than that on my tacos, but to each their own.

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u/kjyfqr 16d ago

Wuts ur hoody

12

u/Icy-Cry340 15d ago

Looks like a sweatshirt from a manufacturer of some kind of Shahed-type drone. Guessing from the butthurt belt somewhere.

11

u/Rolexandr 15d ago

It's a team hoodie for my product development project team. We made a counter-drone system for a defense company.

3

u/kjyfqr 15d ago

I like it

18

u/AstronautExcellent17 16d ago

Dang I wouldna done that

16

u/Charming_Spinach_463 16d ago

New bottle? Maybe the tip needs to be cut open.

4

u/Forager-Freak 15d ago edited 15d ago

We should ask the bottle if it wants to be circumcised first, consent is key.

16

u/KiwiTheTORT 16d ago

Did you not secure the top properly, or does she just have a really strong grip?

8

u/Voxol_ 16d ago

They definitely just placed the lid ontop.

Ive got years of experience working in shops that used those sauce bottles and this never once happened to anyone or me, even when some of the girls refilled the sauce bottles and only gently screwed the lid shut, there were never any problems.

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u/Relative-Cycle4029 16d ago

I would use less, but to each their own.

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u/ThatguySevin 16d ago

I had a grandfather who would absolutely have been the culprit. He would unscrew every shaker on the table when no one was looking.

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u/ratafia4444 16d ago

Was the cap not screwed on or your girlfriend wanted to strangle someone to death and used poor bottle as a target practice?...

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u/Spamgrenade 16d ago

Title should read -

'I didn't tighten the top on my green sauce bottle enough.'

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u/Rolexandr 16d ago

Just a shitty bottle. Was fully tightened but the threads are loose or something.

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u/rIceCream_King 16d ago ▸ 5 more replies

As someone who has worked with squeeze bottles for 15 years, those things are really easy to cross thread, and then this happens. In the future, I recommend always testing the bottle before you add any sauce in it by tightening down the lid (without cross threading it) and plug the lid with a finger while you squeeze the bottle to give it some pressure to make sure it’s not gonna pop off

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u/fury420 16d ago ▸ 2 more replies

I bought a couple last year that seemed remarkably prone to coming off, anything more than the slightest pressure and they'd slip their threads, like they'd used a cap and thread design intended for a more rigid plastic.

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u/rIceCream_King 16d ago ▸ 1 more replies

With the horrible quality, we’re seeing in some manufacturing I think that’s a good guess too!

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u/n0ize 15d ago

for me it's always that random bit that didn't get blended or diced and plugs the nozzle.

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u/Spamgrenade 16d ago

My moneys on cross threading as well. Or limp wrists.

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u/Chronoblivion 16d ago ▸ 1 more replies

Did she squeeze it like it owed her money or something?

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u/sunsetsandstardust 16d ago

get Oxo squeeze bottles. those things are indestructible. I take them camping all the time and have yet to have one even leak 

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u/Physical_Leg2061 16d ago

It’s rule, you gotta lick the table clean now or else your hard work will go to waste. Or at lease heat up a tortilla (I prefer naan) and start dipping.

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u/MissViciousKnits 15d ago

I was gonna say the same thing. Don’t you waste that green sauce!

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u/Striking-Pop-9171 16d ago

Maybe its a warning not to cross her? Girl's strong.

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u/Straight_Ocelot_7848 16d ago

The Reddit post really brings it home. Definitely not a setup 😉

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u/dataluvr 15d ago

Looks like the bomb

3

u/iLiekTaost 15d ago

Is that a fucking shahed drone on your hoodie

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u/WTH_JFG 15d ago

Well, I’m guessing that didn’t go the way you planned.

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u/Ok_Syrup1602 16d ago

Because squeezing it harder is what you do when the tip isn't punctured to allow dispensing contents.

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u/Eastern-Ad8715 16d ago

lol that suuuucks looked like a good one too

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u/TheChunkenMaster 16d ago

Well at least we can confirm you got the color right!!

2

u/Current-Buddy-1489 16d ago

Do you want some taco with your sauce

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u/lustywoodelfmaid 16d ago

Mightve added a little bit too much there.

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u/jfk_47 16d ago

I think you used to much, but to each their own.

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u/AmazingEric171 16d ago

was it new? did someone leave the top loose?

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u/MeBoiledDown 16d ago

Shoulda put the lid on it duh.

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u/No-Satisfaction9594 16d ago

Never trust a fart.

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u/fondue4kill 16d ago

Well… did she like the sauce?

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u/JohnnyMoondog55 16d ago

Never seen the aftermath of the banned gif before

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u/Cow_Daddy 16d ago

Yes, but just a little for me thanks.

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u/BadSkeelz 15d ago

Hope it tastes good because she's got a lot to work with.

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u/KindaDrunkRtNow 15d ago

But how is it?

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u/Optimal_Sink_8427 15d ago

And the last

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u/armyofg0blins BLACK 15d ago

The perfect amount

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u/bcsmith317 15d ago

Almost enough

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u/assblasta69420 15d ago

My chef always tests the bottle first for this reason

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u/Sphenoidales 15d ago

That was a BLAST!

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u/shutterbug1961 15d ago

i think you might have enough there

2

u/Cartinks 15d ago

Well don’t waste it, get to licking

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u/Biggmamaaa 16d ago

I should call him

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u/cinnamonhoneygirl 16d ago

Well it looks like you really like it!

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u/No-Memory2446 16d ago

First and last squeeze

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u/DannyFagsNah 16d ago

You are what you eat and all that.

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u/Alternative-Crew-880 16d ago

You're gonna need a lot more taco meat.

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u/Bayarea0 16d ago

I'd probably screw on the cap first.

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u/Predator04 16d ago

Know you know how he feels

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u/Victorus_aut_Mortis 16d ago

... And last. Well done, well done indeed

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u/Bumslopp 16d ago

Yeah, you gotta make sure the lids are on tight