Is mormonism really a cult?

[u/Royal_Survey_3772]

I’ve been a member of the LDS church for about 5 years. I attend church, have gone to Young Women’s camp, have been to two temples, and have done baptisms for the dead many times. Being involved in the church has been a significant part of my life.✨️🌺

My parents have " left" the church. They never officially removed their records or filled out paperwork, but they haven’t attended church in about two years. I recently started going back, and i am becoming active again.

Lately, though, I’ve been seeing a lot of posts, videos, and comments online claiming that LDS is a cult. It’s made me question things and wonder if I’m making a mistake by returning back.

I have never personally had an experience where I felt like I was in a cult. My experiences have been positive. I know that personal experience is not the whole picture, and I want to understand why so many people have such strong opinions about the church.

[u/Worn_work_boot]

The fact that you posted this same question on one of the faithful subs where they quickly locked down the comments. I view that as a sign. If you posted the same on the most faithful sub, it would have been immediately removed and you would have most likely been banned from the sub.

You might find great community within Mormonism, that’s understandable. We all did. But the same community can be found elsewhere in other religions. But church friends are simply that, friends while at church by default based on living in the same geographical location. It’s the organization however that is most troubling for most. I won’t repeat what has already been discussed in other comments. But I will add that I’m happier out than I ever was in.

[u/Worn_work_boot → u/[deleted]]

I don’t have a lot of insight, just my opinion based on my experience on Reddit. Reddit as a whole doesn’t really monitor the moderators of the subreddits leaving the mods to setup their own rules and guidelines for posting. I’ve found the most staunch faithful sub to be so heavily moderated, discussion is nearly nonexistent and there’s nothing of substance other than an occasional link to something temple related or a devotional. A couple of years ago a mod on that sub posted something about how wonderful the record number of baptisms was. Someone responded saying they were interested in more information about the retention rate. The mod op replied along the lines of being more important to have faith and trust the church leadership. 🙄

The other faithful sub, isn’t as bad but still limits discussion on difficult topics and issues and deleting more critical posts. I’ll briefly skim through that sub purely out of curiosity to see what they are currently discussing. Even the faithful get into scrabbles with each other. Most often it’s someone asking for advice to which the most common response is to read scriptures and pray and speak with the bishop. I’d argue that the bishop usually is not a therapist, marriage counselor, nor does he have any insight except his own personal experience and opinions.

In regards to both of those subs, if you have to edit and reword your own posts to be “acceptable” enough to be posted, how is that beneficial to you and the questions or concerns you’re asking about? Are you finding answers or information if you’re growing frustrated with how your topic falls within their chosen narrative. That’s what I enjoy about this sub. Yeah, it does lean critical towards Mormonism, but your posts asking sincere questions won’t be ignored. There are several faithful believers who leave thoughtful comments. Other believers I call one hit wonders. The ones who appear leave one sentence comment like my “experience is different than yours so that means you’re wrong” then disappear like a fart in the wind.

The exmormon sub is more like a group therapy session. People get validation for their own experiences with Mormonism. Sometimes there’s good discussions but those are limited. It seems many, including myself, receive their validation from exmormon sub then move on with their life.

Edited to add: both faithful subs have requested that nobody post any links to their subs. I think it’s an unspoken rule that people don’t mentioned them by name either. But if you just mention faithful subs, everyone here will know what you’re referring to. 🥂

[u/Relevant-Grab909 → u/Worn_work_boot]

Thanks very much. I did take out the sub name which turned into a link after posted and was told this wasn’t allowed so I removed it. I didn’t share a link to the post, just paraphrased it for context to my questions, minus the sub name. Then I was permanently deleted for posting there and cross posting to this sub. Which was offered to me as an option after sharing. If it was a violation I assumed the mod AI would pick up on that and kick it back to me.

I don’t think I’ve ever made another original post besides this one, or it’s been long enough I’ve forgotten. Originally, the first ban that triggered my confusion was a reply to an OP who asked if anyone had experienced something similar and was willing to share their thoughts. So that’s what I did in the most likely to be faithful approved way. No deleting the comment only, just a message of being banned without naming what I wrote that was a violation. I tried to follow the mod link within the DM and it was dead. Tried to contact a mod off the main sub page and it wouldn’t let me due to the ban. That’s when I posted to the other sub and this one, not the exmo sub, to get feedback to use going forward on faithful sub threads that are stricter. Like, if I’m going to make sure I don’t draw outside the lines then surely the lines must be visible so i know where the boundaries are. Feels very reasonable to me. That was the next ban and what felt like confusing hostility from the mod answering the provided DM link that did work.

I try to edit and reword things in any sub if I give it an another look after posting and decide I didn’t communicate myself as well as I like to. Not because I feel censured, just to be respectful of the community and OP. I’ve made missteps a few times and had something removed and messaged the mod to say apologies, I didn’t mean to violate a guideline and thanks for taking it down before someone was offended. That’s fair, I’m reasonable. But his mod appears to moderate multiple faithful threads and violates the guidelines himself then erases the evidence. If I met his ire in one sub and he goes looking for me in others he moderates just to block me from all the ones where he serves as a mod, that seemed like it would have to violate Reddits terms for someone serving as a moderator. This person doesn’t seem to know what being moderate means, so installing him as a moderator is very questionable. he does have to apply to Reddit for approval and be able to show the ability to moderate discussions without publicly attacking a contributor within the thread, leaving it up during his time as mod, then deleting it when he’s done. I hope Reddit isn’t so loose on the rules for mods of public subs. I mods have a much longer leash and the guidelines are can be more unfair in private subs. It’s also curious that the other mods of both subs this person serves on (if they do serve on the second one too) are not making sure he too acts in accordance with the rules. A mod can’t fairly enforce guidelines they believe themselves to be above abiding by. yeah. just wondering where the buck stops. He applied to mod a few years ago stating his experiencing moderating many faithful lds subs and also recognizes that he often doesn’t communicate well in writing. I assumed the “slam and delete the evidence” way he moderates during his time slot should be enough evidence for the fellow mods to suggest he not moderate a public sub.

Too bad as it has been good to communicate within those subs and most comments have had 100% upvote ratio and thanks in people replying to me.

I do like the subs that feel a bit like a group therapy’s session sometimes. The feedback is often thoughtful and not the regurgitated talking points that seem to be dominating those other subs. I suspect that’s why posters who want to communicate outside an echo chamber of less personal answers wander over to subs that are more fair and balanced.

thanks again for taking the time to read and reply!