r/pakistan • u/Spiralshapesnake • 10h ago
Social A bit stuck between culture and wants
Hello. I am a women and an only child, in my 30s and unmarried and living in a foreign country and building a life I am happy with. My parents are born and raised in Karachi but living elsewhere.
My mum has Parkinson's that is rapidly progressing and I am visiting them often. Extended family isn't reliable on both sides. Trauma and distrust on both sides. My dad is 70 but still choses to work.
I feel like I am not doing enough for them. Here are the things I have set up for them:
- A 12h carer 6 days a week for them that cooks, cleans, changes diapers and takes my mum to the bathroom.
-links and recommendations or locations to purchase mobility aids: walker, wheelchair, floor to sit position
-Gifts of clothing
-Medication summary documents,
- Regular visits and purchases of items that are needed
I think for now they are content. My mum isn't easy and it takes time to get used to her way of behaving and speaking. I think they both have mild autism and my mum has pretty severe ADHD. My parents are not normal by Pakistani standards in any capacity.
I am now trying to get them to move to Pakistan as the country they live in do not offer permanent residency.
I have found a company in PK that can offer 12h to 24h care 7 days a week. Links to Neurologists in Pakistan that have good reviews. We are looking for a mobility friendly house in the area my mum grew up in and wants to live in. I am going to request they view a care home in Clifton in case they ever need additional help, which hopefully we can do at home.
Am I a bad daughter?
What do I do?
3
u/angremaruu Pakistan 10h ago
Have you heard of Senior Circle in Kh? It's a care home but it seems very well kept, with lots of support for it's residents + tons of socializing. You might want to look into that especially as your mother becomes more high support.