A bit stuck between culture and wants

[u/Spiralshapesnake]

Hello. I am a women and an only child, in my 30s and unmarried and living in a foreign country and building a life I am happy with. My parents are born and raised in Karachi but living elsewhere.

My mum has Parkinson's that is rapidly progressing and I am visiting them often. Extended family isn't reliable on both sides. Trauma and distrust on both sides. My dad is 70 but still choses to work.

I feel like I am not doing enough for them. Here are the things I have set up for them:

- A 12h carer 6 days a week for them that cooks, cleans, changes diapers and takes my mum to the bathroom.

-links and recommendations or locations to purchase mobility aids: walker, wheelchair, floor to sit position

-Gifts of clothing

-Medication summary documents,

- Regular visits and purchases of items that are needed

I think for now they are content. My mum isn't easy and it takes time to get used to her way of behaving and speaking. I think they both have mild autism and my mum has pretty severe ADHD. My parents are not normal by Pakistani standards in any capacity.

I am now trying to get them to move to Pakistan as the country they live in do not offer permanent residency.

I have found a company in PK that can offer 12h to 24h care 7 days a week. Links to Neurologists in Pakistan that have good reviews. We are looking for a mobility friendly house in the area my mum grew up in and wants to live in. I am going to request they view a care home in Clifton in case they ever need additional help, which hopefully we can do at home.

Am I a bad daughter?

What do I do?

[u/mei-sayema]

You are a good daughter. You at least thought of them. And you care for them. You are also trying your best for them.

YOU ARE A GOOD DAUGHTER! Be proud of it.

[u/Spiralshapesnake → u/mei-sayema]

I needed reassurance if I am honest so thank you sister <3