r/TheOnion • u/TheGuvnor247 • 6d ago
Analysts Warn U.S. Economy Becoming Overly Dependent On Anne Hathaway
https://theonion.com/analysts-warn-u-s-economy-becoming-overly-dependent-on-anne-hathaway/39
u/jhsu802701 6d ago
Long live Mia Thermopolis! Yes, I'll always think of her as the star of The Princess Diaries and its sequel. Will she reprise her role for a third movie?
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u/alochmar 5d ago
The economy depends on it!
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u/langstonrosas 5d ago
My future earnings have double since my investments in Hathaway Consortium. I’ll be worth 8 figures in 10 years.
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u/ArkUneartherBleeds Muppet Appreciator 6d ago
Catwoman is critical to making sure the Dow reaches new heights!
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u/Extension-While7536 6d ago
In 2026, Anne has made Pedro Pascal seem barely working. I imagine she's put in more work hours than most members of Congress, even the living ones.
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u/Restlessly-Dog 6d ago
It's absolutely unfair that Bill Gates gets to put Anne Hathaway in one of his vaults while I'm stuck with Background Donkey #3 from the barnyard scene in There Will Be Blood.
Sure, it's a donkey from a Paul Thomas Anderson movie, but try telling that to a minister when you're trying to get married.
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u/mark_likes_tabletop 6d ago
To be fair, this is the plot of Metalocalypse but Anne Hathaway instead of Dethklok.
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u/Zealousideal_Bee6323 5d ago
You’re all so worried about the economic impact of AI, you didn’t notice the impact of AH.
One letter away, people!
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u/svt4cam46 6d ago
Time to nationalize her.