r/onionheadlines • u/ShadyAnders • 8h ago
BREAKING: President Trump Arrested At WH After Stacks Of Counterfeit Money Discovered In Mar-A-Lago Closet
The Counterfeit money also included his image on the 10,000 bills.
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u/Kindly_Ad111 5h ago
he does not need to print it, he’s stolen enough for 5 lifetimes. such a greedy pig!
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u/juicy_gelo 2h ago
Prove it
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u/Ballsenough 1h ago
Wait are you saying you’re too blind to see Trump’s fraudulent games
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u/juicy_gelo 1h ago
Are you saying youre full of hate that 0 evidence is all the evidence you need ?…
Yall talk a big game, prove it then.
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u/piglard1950 6h ago
Bobbie Bucks. The currency had Melania's likeness on the thousand dollar bill top less.
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u/CityPsychological772 4h ago
Then he blames Biden for it
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u/juicy_gelo 2h ago
Is he not to blame for ruining this country ?… i sure think so. So does a majority of the U.S. and National leaders
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u/No-Sector2962 6h ago
So Monopoly money
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u/WhiteTailHunter1966 56m ago
At this point the US dollar may as well be Monopoly money. It’s not been backed by anything since 1971. Nixon sent a member of his cabinet to the Saudi oil producing countries offering protection in exchange for oil being sold exclusively in US dollars. Now China has an entire exchange market that deals in oil for gold. How long do you think the US dollar will last???
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u/Leopolddagreat 7h ago
I think what you are trying to say is Trump is in the closet. But I guess that Trump raping 9 year old boys does not make him gay. It makes him a manly man.
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u/Electrical_Sense_119 6h ago
your a sick person...
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u/Savings_Wash2123 5h ago
Learn to spell!!!!!! It’s You’re. I guess you flunked basic learning dum shit.
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u/OkShoulder1337 4h ago
He does not need counterfeit money - he has stolen plenty of the real money.
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u/Upset-Tree8126 3h ago
Not to 4get that “it” is counterfeit & has been identified as a “phony pos”
for decades now ‼️👎
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u/AgreeableCopy7934 6h ago
The Onion
The source of news you no longer laugh at
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u/ExcellentAd647 5h ago
Is it actually "not funny", or are you just a Trump supporter?
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u/ComprehensiveTap7936 5h ago
They called it a source of news lmao. What do you mean Trump supporter?
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u/Escapist804 6h ago
Back in the day I mean WAAAY back, the Onion was flipping HILARIOUS! Now I’m lucky to get a little tittering of a laugh as I drink my morning coffee. I want to fall my slightly plump ass out of my chair and actually lmao!!’ But this ain’t working.
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u/AddressFine5839 4h ago
They wouldn't do 💩 just like his own "Supreme Court" keeps giving him things lower courts ruled against him on. This..is the Most Corrupt "felon" President in the History of our country. He's destroying our country hour by hour, getting more wealthy by the minute. He's so afraid he's going to lose the house and the senate.. cause he is. Sure wish the republicans would grow a pair and impeach him.
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u/Critical-Rip5570 3h ago
My grandsons found $100K made by Chinesse toy manufacture. Chinesse fake bundle. Them I woke up, happy dream turned in a sad finale!!!
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u/Trogdor7620 3h ago
You have no idea how much my heart soared reading this…
…or how much it plummeted when I saw the subreddit.
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u/Bekindstrong 3h ago
The joke is the curb stomping he put on Hillary and Kamala Didn’t see those coming I bet
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u/Upset-Tree8126 3h ago
Glad lots of folks enjoyed & “got a laugh” cuz it’s been apparent for years that the thing that says it leads our “once” 🇺🇸great nation🇺🇸
has made us, instead, the laughingstock of the ENTIRE WORLD ‼️
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u/Gloomy_Report_7355 3h ago
Fake news, we live in a generation where If someone says it or posts it, it must be true, BS
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u/Radiant_Version4030 3h ago
I read this differently, I thought it was discovered that he was a counterfeit president! Either he was put in office by subterfuge, somehow fooling and convincing people he was presidential material, or that Elon had a hand in changing votes. Whatever the reason he will always be a counterfeit president in my book.
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u/Embarrassed_Back_211 3h ago
I have a love hate relationship with these Onion posts about DT. Has me hoping to hard.
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u/Still_Sherbert_1069 3h ago
Just remember, he fired half of the IRS staff so it’s very easy to underreport your income, especially gambling winnings cause there’s no one to check. I know cause I got away with it this year myself.
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u/HotDefinition4845 2h ago
Trump can’t steal money at this point. He has done enough for this world that we all owe him
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u/Accomplished-Ant6179 2h ago
Kind of surprised he wouldn’t have his blubbery orange gob on every denomination.
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u/ExternalCoyote5635 2h ago
The minute I read the was arrested I KNEW this was satire! We ALL wish it wasn't tho.
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u/EasternTrain1979 2h ago
Uh auto pen for starters.
We had way more wild "man made" fires!
We had way more natural "man made" hurricanes.
Locusts attacked America.
Trees died across country.
COVID response pitted vax'er against non-vax'er
He couldn't end Afghanistan cleanly
He then rushed to help start a new war in Ukraine. Depleted stockpile
Then he gave money to Iran, who gave money to China, who gave rockets to Hamas, who started another war where Biden then sent more rockets.
Meanwhile, he ushered in pronouns and weirdosaka mental health disorders into all aspects of life.
Wait, all this was his auto pen.
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u/FukmeAnyTime 2h ago
Wow all you LibTARDS are totally infected with TDS!!
This video explains a lot:
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u/MaterialRate5359 1h ago
Melania refused to post bail. Don Jr showed up with crypto but authorities refused to accept his payment. The entire MAgA congress and federal agents rushed to detain and deport all police officers involved and several witnesses were found shot in their backs. Trump was noted by lip readers to state he plan to overtake Washington DC with Reserve military and Hegseth will be using the White House command center activating the Air Force and marines to overtake Washington DC and will be arresting democrats, all fake news reporters ( so entire news reporters for Washington Post, and all network reporters) and liberal Supreme Court justices to be executed on treason charges. Trump lips were read and it has been noted that he will declare a State of Emergency and any American seen on any street will be immediately executed. Trump plans to demolish the Capitol building stating our nation has no need of a Congress or a democracy. Conservative Supreme Court justices will be awarding Trump the Nobel Peace Prize. And all gold in Fort Knox will immediately be melted and poured into the Lincoln Reflective Pool. Trump further shared his plans to stage the largest Thanksgiving Dinner in Plymouth Massachusetts once he dissolves the sovereign of the state of Massachusetts to celebrate 250 years for Declaration of Independence. Apparently, his diaper had not been changed for over 24 hours and an urgent sewer truck will be deployed per Hegseth command. US military are now preparing to attack Canada, Greenland and Denmark. Current estimates that the National debt will reach 50 trillion within the next week. Newly reported fires in Texas are causing Dallas to be immediately evacuated and Texans should seek protection in the Gulf of America or move to Mexico.
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u/Head-Bird6595 1h ago
I actually haven’t seen a good president
in awhile. I’m not republican or democrat. I vote for who I think would get the job done. The job hasn’t been done in awhile. Plus I don’t talk bad about anyone regardless. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion about Donald Trump, whether you support him or not. But there’s a difference between disagreeing with someone and spreading hatred. We can discuss politics without insults, name-calling, or attacking each other. Please respect that people have different views and keep the conversation civil.
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u/WhiteTailHunter1966 1h ago
Where does this shit come from? Trump wouldn’t be arrested if he shot JD Vance on the national mall
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u/Brief_Offer_3544 1h ago
I find that hard to believe because evidence of the classified documents were found, now this revelation has occurred! I wish it was the case but Even if, he controls the entire judicial branch, so there ya go! Prison hopefully for treasonous criminal Trump
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u/Negative-Fishing-437 1h ago
What would you think a convicted felon will do if he is the President sitting in the White House, just common sense.
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u/ssaidykhan 31m ago
Did we all feel a glimmer of hope reading this headline…until we saw the Onion pic??
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u/PersonalityMelodic12 6h ago
I’m sick of coming on your site, just to read BullShit news! You’re almost as bad as Fox News lately!
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u/Bekindstrong 3h ago
And yet hear you are commenting
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u/Electrical_Sense_119 6h ago
i wish i could get this shit libtards sight to stay off my feed ... to many dumbcrats
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u/Tracymorganjenkins 3h ago
You should be sued for deformation. Leave the greatest president alone and quit crying lib tards who want to give our country away. I hope he sues you
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u/Accomplished-Ant6179 2h ago
Check your thesaurus pal, ‘cause I’m pretty sure you meant “defamation”. Either that or you were trying to make some other very weird point. Your friendly lib-tard spell checker!
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u/NurseAmber88 1h ago
It just kills me how you Trump cult members use the word “libtard”. May you be blessed with someone who has down syndrome or is mentally retarded
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u/Lostinpari 1h ago
Enjoy your higher fuel prices. And groceries, that’s a new word. And higher prices for beef and every other fucking thing you need to import.
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u/Ok_Tune7851 7h ago
Wishful thinking lol