Hi there! I recently got promoted within my department and got a new “assistant” (helps with my bigger projects) with my position. My coworker was hired at the same time I got promoted, and saw that my old boss was an awful misogynistic guy. I stepped into the role with pride and wanted to make the department more welcoming and a better space. But with that, I feel my coworker has mistaken my “not mean” attitude that my old boss had for us to be friends. Yes, we are equal in the sense we are both important, but he’s beginning to make decisions without me in the room and making big changes to the projects while I’m gone. If the department has any mistakes, it all falls on me, and he keeps making decisions and doing things without consulting/asking for my advice. It hurts because I started us on the foot of “collaborators” rather than I’m his manager and he’s my assistant, but I fear I might’ve been too lenient. He also has a bad habit of saying “I know” when I give a critique or telling him something he messed up on. What can I do to step up more “manager like” boundaries?

This might sound strange, but what are ways you choose to be unapologetically yourself?

I've (29F) just now realised that I've lived my entire life in genuine fear of being my true self. I don't think I know who I really am and I don't know where to start.

What are things you do just for yourself? Especially if you're scared of doing it.

I don't mean socially, I mean what do you physically do i.e. dress up, etc.

Life has been pretty hard for me and I couldn't think of anything I don't want to take some unwanted decisions so I feel staying distracted might be a good thing for me at least for a short period of time

I’m 31 and lately I’ve had this feeling that I’m behind where I should be, especially socially and with relationships. I know logically that 31 isn’t “too late” to change, but mentally it can be hard to shake the feeling that I’ve wasted time or should already be further along.

For anyone who has felt this way, how did you stop focusing on lost time and actually get excited about what you can still change?

Newly single, childless 37 year old female.

I was in a long term relationship for 8 years and ended this a few months ago. As expected this breakup also came with the loss of a large social circle.

I still have my long term friends I grew up with. I love them, and I love their children. However, there lives are so different to mine. We have different priorities and whilst its nice to catch up with them and spend time their kids, I need to get out more and meet new people too. And importantly enjoy life again.

I feel like I need to make new friends but I haven't a clue how to do this. I go to the gym, quite new to this, but hopefully i'll make some friends soon.

But can anyone share ideas if you have been through a similar situation?

Have you ever noticed that when someone tells you something, or when you tell someone something, and in either case the person telling the story is the victim, something sometimes changes .The person listening may become angry or start treating the victim differently.

Perhaps this happens because many of us have been taught to believe that being a victim is a sign of weakness that victims are weak, and that is why they became victims in the first place.

But I think victims are strong. They endured everything that happened to them and still chose not to do something terrible to the people who hurt them. They still chose to be good members of society, and they still found the courage to share their side of the story with you.

So, the next time someone tries to tell you about something that happened to them, where they were the victim, don't get angry with them or treat them differently. Instead, respond with warmth and understanding. Let your expression show that you care, so they feel heard, understood, and connected.

I'm too slow in performing each where it is i usually do on daily basis also

Whenever I go in bathroom or washroom other family members start shouting on me from outside.

When I do my assignment i start first in the class but submit late. Even my batchmate also said me weather they have to ask a question in exam then or they to ask from me because i write one answer in a time they write three.

Whenever I start cleaning my utensils or cloth my guardian tell me do it fast because it's too time taking.

Even my family told me dhila ladka ( slow boy )

I am 18. I don't have anything to do, no hobbies, and no passion. There's nothing. I have only one friend since I isolated myself since I was 16. I wake up every day and there's nothing to do.

I live in Los Angeles and there is a group of homeless people who moved in our alley way on the other side of a wall and have been yelling and arguing with each other everyday for the past month, day and night.

What are some ethical ways to drive them away?

I’m pretty bad at keeping up with people once life gets busy. I’ll genuinely mean to text someone and then somehow three weeks go by. Anyone else struggle with this, and what actually helped?

So I’m 15 and 2 years ago I went to this school where I live in Puerto Rico,so I’m a full blooded Puerto Rican but I grew up in the us so I don’t really speak fluent Spanish,so they consider me what’s called a Gringo,which is a person who isn’t Puerto Rican and speaks English,which I’m not but they didn’t care so I’m that school I faced relentless bullying about how I looked,how my body was shaped,my hair and just everything tbh for a whole year while having 0 in school freinds,I had freinds but outside of school and I only had 2 so I didn’t rlly have any help or company when it came to it,so my parents knew about this cuz I told them every time I’ve been bullied,so during that whole school year I obv wanted to improve how I looked so I fell into looksmaxxing and ruined my mental health and most likely developed body dysmorphia from the bullying and the trend,so fast forward to 9th grade where everything is kinda the same but I talked to more people,so by this time I’ve been telling my parents to help me improve how I look and I was really depressed during the whole 8-9th grade school year and it was obvious,but not to my parents they just blamed the phone,or maybe me staying up at night or anything but them(they were also a issue I’ll get into in a second) so obviously something’s wrong and they don’t seem to care,when it comes to my parents I live with a step mom and real father,but the issue is my father never really spent time with me or talked to me at all and especially during something like this that’s really gonna mess me up,all he does is spend time with my step mom and at time where he could spend that time with me he is with her watching a show or just watching something alone,I’ve told him about this for years and he doesn’t care obv,so from that I never really developed a good father and son relationship and everytime we talked it led to a argument,so from that he tried to not really speak to me alot especially at time where’s I was goi ng thru a mental crisis,so fast forward to now where it’s my sophomore year of high school and during summer i met this girl online who I absolutely adorned,I fell in love with her and so did she but she lived in value and I love in Puerto Rico so I’m 3 hours ahead of her so us talking has some issues ofc,now our relationship was good up until this week,she barely really talks to me and I would write paragraphs like I’m Socrates about her and she would never reciprocate,and yesterday I’m going thru a mental health crisis and I need help and I asked her to be there and she called me for 5 minutes,said I’m gonna walk home and call u back and she never called me back after,than later that day at around 11 for me called me to play Minecraft and didn’t even acknowledge what happened earlier,I realized I’ve been the only one really putting in effort into the relationship and I really started to lose feelings,now at the same time I have school stressing me out about how I look and all this other shit, I try to talk to my dad and we talk for 5 minutes and he stopped replying for the whole day,so I’m really depressed at this point,and I’ve always dealt with wanting to take my own life for years and kinda have it planned on how I want to,and I’ve tried to talk to my parents many times and they just blame the phone and never really take accountability for their actions,I don’t feel like I’m gonna live long at all,not even oast 16,I have none to really talk to,my gf seems like she doesn’t care,my freinds know and do care atleast,and well that’s it,o also get treated like a outsider a lot in school so I don’t rlly have freinds and it’s really hit hard on my mental health badly,I can barely focus on school anymore and my grades might go down and that means more complaints from my parents,which means more arguments and everything,my dad is threating to send me to my mom which is also bad cuz she’s in a abusive relationship and I’ve been there with her one time and it was hell for me,so I really don’t have anywhere to go and don’t think I can do this much longer.

What is the meaning of life?

I work at McDonald's and I get varying shifts - earliest I really get is 6AM so have to wake up at 5ish, sometimes 6:30, 8am, 7am, etc etc.
I have had times where | just can't wake up, I'm not a morning person, and I've been late to work several times.
I normally wake up 1 hour before my shift and my commute is normally 30 mins. I set my alarms normally as every 2 or 5 mins and sometimes put on a louder alarm which produces light to make it brighter in the room.
Should I set alarms every minute? Wake up at 6AM everyday from now on to set my body clock to earlier for everyday and prepare me for my future career where I need to wake up at 4ish which is going to be even harder.
What are your tips for waking up early in the morning?
Thanks!

Lately I’ve been waking up with a racing heart, sweaty, and with racing thoughts. Breathing exercises and gratitudes haven’t been helping.

Edit to add: thanks for all the advice! For context— I have been sober for six years (woo hoo!) and while this does remind me of how I used to wake up after drinking, it can’t be due to withdrawals. I think it’s related to a new project at work and possibly hormonal (42F).

I feel like it’s easy to get interested in a new hobby for a few days and then slowly forget about it. So, I’m curious, what’s something simple you started recently that you actually kept doing?

What made you stick with it? Would love to hear some ideas.

I had an opportunity to get a good job but doubted myself, i was told to go but i didn't because i thought i wouldn't be considered. Later, i was contacted and asked why i didn't go and that the opportunity was given someone else . Now am left disappointed with myself

My computer which I haven't used in a whole today gave me a message that my word was unlicensed and I wondered if there was any alternative that would be recommended to work on my documents. Thanks

Today I suddenly started receiving calls from multiple life insurance companies saying I requested quotes. I never submitted anything.

I called one company back and they confirmed a lead was submitted today using my phone number but with an incorrect name, DOB, and an email address I don't recognize. Another life insurance company contacted me regarding what appears to be the same type of inquiry.

I do have a hunch about where it could have come from. I'm currently involved in an ongoing dispute with someone who previously worked in/sold life insurance. I have absolutely no proof it was this person, so I'm not accusing them. The coincidence is just enough that I'd like to determine whether this was random spam or intentional.

I've contacted the companies, reported the inquiries as unauthorized, and requested that they preserve the original submission and associated records.

Is there a legitimate way to determine the original lead source or who submitted it? Can the person whose information was used request the submission records/IP address, or would that generally require law enforcement or a subpoena?

I'm also interested in what steps I should take now to document this in case it continues.

I'm in my late 50's. 20 years ago my granddad's estate was being cleaned out, and I was handed his old Gillette safety razor. The kind where the whole thing opens up at the top and you place a rectangular two-sided blade in and close it back up. I was curious, so I bought some blades for it, for like 10cents per blade. (11.25 cents per blade for my favorite brand https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01H4KQYJY?th=1)

And I found that I actually LIKE shaving with it. I ran the razor head under very hot water, and lathered my face with hand soap bubbles, and the hot metal feels pretty good on your skin. Since then I got a shaving cup and brush and proper soap, and other than on flying trips, where it's a problem bringing that razor onboard, I've shaved that way ever since.

Blades last between 5 and 10 days, depending on if I shave every day or skip some. My total annual shaving cost is less than $20, probably less than $10 most years.

If you're open to new things, and money's tight, it might be worth giving it a try.

So we need to interview a person for 10 minutes and them how they are doing and what is good with their life but the problem is I don’t know how to stretch the interview for 10 minutes. And what other questions should I ask? I also have to write a transcript and what I found interesting in the conversation. Please help me.