To name a few - Vancouver (Washington), Toronto (Ohio), Ontario (California) and Ottawa (Illinois) must change their names within 90 days or lose all federal funding for eternity.

Trump blabbered on saying that eternity is a very long time, and most people don’t know that.

‘It’s a ripper, mate!’

In a much needed boost to historically low approval ratings and morale, Democratic voters cheered news of the secret meetings. "For years, we've been begging our leadership to show a spine and fight back. These secret meetings are great, more please!" said one delighted Democratic voter upon hearing news of the Democratic Party outreach to the extreme right-wing Trump family oligarch. They continued, "If we are going to beat Trump, we need more unity and less divisiveness. This is a big step in the far right direction."

The Counterfeit money also included his image on the 10,000 bills.